You shouldn’t kick yourself when you’re down . . .
. . . but sometimes it’s hard not to. Even if we’re compassionate toward others, we can still be our own worst critics.
Mindfulness meditation really works. And self-compassion is one of its key benefits.
Kristen Neff, PhD, from the University of Texas-Austin, and Christopher Germer, PhD, from Harvard Medical School, wanted to find out whether self-compassion could be developed through training.
Dr. Neff and Dr. Germer randomly assigned 54 people to either an 8-week mindfulness self-compassion (MSC) program or a waitlist control.
The MSC program combined weekly 2-hour meetings with homework and a half-day meditation retreat. The program began with an explanation of what self-compassion is, and incorporated both formal and informal mindfulness practices.
Before the program, participants completed surveys to measure self-compassion, mindfulness, and other internal states. They took the same surveys immediately after the program’s completion, and then 6 months later as a follow-up.
And, as it turns out, Dr. Neff and Dr. Germer have good news for people who’d like to develop self-compassion.
After taking the program, participants reported significantly greater gains in self-compassion, along with mindfulness, compassion for others, and life satisfaction when compared with the control group.
What’s more, researchers found a large statistical effect size in self-compassion. This is relevant because many previous studies of mindfulness programs have found substantially smaller effect sizes – suggesting that this program might be particularly effective.
Of course, since the research involves only self-report data, we should be cautious about drawing conclusions. When people reply that they’re more compassionate or mindful on a survey, what does that really mean about their mental states?
What’s more, this research involves only a waitlist control. That means we can’t be sure what made the difference. People might develop self-compassion just from getting together twice a week. Or maybe doing “mental homework” of any kind helps all sorts of internal states.
So, while I think this is a good foundation, I’d like to see more research that uses objective measures of self-compassion and an active control.
If you’d like to read the whole study, it’s currently in press in the Journal of Clinical Psychology.
Of course, to see the benefits of self-compassion with your clients, you need to be able to introduce mindfulness effectively.
Has mindfulness training ever transformed one of your clients’ capacity for self-compassion? What about your own? Please share your thoughts in the comments below.
ed sheeran first album says
I couldn’t be more in agreement. By the way, do you see more of the same for the days and months ahead? I am very intrigued by your positions and your posts.
Robin, LCSW says
I run a multifamily group on Saturday mornings as part of the intensive outpatient program I facilitate. I designed the group to provide information to family members in support of patients coming to understanding about the impact of mental illness on their daily functioning. Today, we discussed the impact on relationships of the balance between self compassion and consideration of others. Our group practices effective communication methods that place emphasis on I and We language instead of You and My. I am excited and blessed when I watch the famiilies practice acceptance of each other in that moment, forgiveness for themselves for labels and judgments that sabotage self worth. I truly believe the practice of mindfulness is a vital tool for transforming our perspectives and accepting the gifts of Spirit in our lives. Thank you for your research.
Kristin Neff, Professor says
Thanks for writing this article (I found it because I have a google alerts on self-compassion). I just thought I’d mention that there is, in fact, no objective measure of self-compassion. How can an outside observer peer into the mind of someone else and know what’s going on there? And certainly an fMRI couldn’t distinguish self-compassion from other similar mindstates, or much accuracy at all in terms of level of the experience. Self-report is still the best tool we have for measuring subjective mindstates. It’s also good to know that when people use the scale to describe their partner’s self-compassionate behaviors, partner and self-reports correlate .70, which is very high. The self-compassion scale is therefore tapping into something clear observable by intimate others.
Kathleen Hunter, teacher, mediator, life coach, motivational speaker says
Yes, whenever “life happens” mindfulness and meditation is the place to go for me. (I do mediate each day.)
The month of September presented itself with two critical situations. First, my son was attacked, beaten and chocked by a stranger in San Francisco while he and his wife were biking. (He had crossed a street and appeared to be alone.) My son is fine physically, and I believe he is seeing a therapist for trauma.
Then my husband resisted going to have a cough checked; it got worse. Finally with chocking, he was taken to the doctor with a collapsed lung lobe and a blockage of some sort. Wednesday he was found to have had pneumonia and a mucus plug was “rinsed out” by the surgeon. Voila! the lung re-inflated!
What I’m getting at here is that without mindfulness meditation I wouldn’t have been able to operate from a place of clarity, and peace for myself and for my family members. While all this was going on I just went within. I especially enjoyed – yes enjoyed – Deepak Chopra’s 21 Day Meditation challenge which I did through out the day. Hugs, Kathy
Dr. Lamber R. Soze Banga, Astro-Homoeo. Researcher says
I think a large number of people in India are totally innocent in this regard and must be taught basically to learn about themselves through such programmes like this one.
Dr. Lamber R. Soze Banga
Jennifer, Retired says
I think people in general are fearful of meditation because they think it could be some kind of brain washing. I also feel theire are some concerns about what seems to be complicated methods of meditation. Marty’s breathing track is so simple – just 10 minutes a day – no need of group sessions.
Groups would be valuable to share experiences, and the more feedback given will only interest and help others to try. This is why these websites are so important to those who really want a better life by healing within. I am a journey in process – a process that will not end until I draw my last breath.
Ronnie Moehrke, Author says
About forty-five years ago – (I’m now 80) I realized how inner negative comments towards others would randomly come into my mind and I was aware I had serious negative thoughts towards myself – sometimes it would get so bad that I was seriously suicidal.
I made up my mind then that My mind was MY business and My responsibility for what I allowed into it – and I was never going to get “well” if I allowed negative thoughts to run around in my mind randomly….and ever since then I have guarded my mind from negativity – not from righteous anger – I had to differentiate the two – that was part of the process of being aware of what was going on in my mind. I didn’t realize then that I was suffering from PTSD.
I have written a book that is in the process of being published under the name Ronnie Fellows:
THE ONLY GOOD INDIAN: PTSD: A Native American’s story of Survival…
It should be available soon.
Judith Alexander MSW, ACSW, clinical social worker, private practice says
I have been self-employed in a town of 9,000 people for the past 30 years. For the past 18 of those years, I have offered 6 month long classes using Julia Cameron’s book, The Artist’s Way, a Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity to well over 100 GROUPS of people. The groups meet for 2 hours per week, and participants agree to use the tools of the course: journaling 3 pages each morning (Morning Pages) and taking a weekly “date” alone to experience something heartful, creative, or just enjoyable, developing 2 habits of paying attention to what is on one’s mind, and experiencing what one enjoys doing. Along with the content of the book, the process instigates profound changes in most participants’ lives, whereby they embrace their “heart’s desires” (I have always wanted to do ______ ) via the weekly dates, and let go of the previously unconscious mental negativity that underscores the lack of self compassion by, through the journaling process SEEING the rote self bashing that acts as white noise in most people’s minds, at least some of the time. I have seen people leave destructive circumstances behind, start new businesses that enliven them, lose weight, start health programs for themselves – in short – they ditch bad habits, and embrace new ones, through the increased consciousness of the course input. There is the weekly support holding them to the process, but at least as much benefit of learning self-compassion is derived from the use of the tools and the information so well articulated in the book. It has been a best seller since the mid 90’s and I believe the reason why is it gets results! Not just for artists, but for anyone wanting to grow in their self awareness and self love, The Artist’s Way is a transforming process, for sure. Establishing self-compassion is one of the main results, in my experience.
Marty, Retired says
I find some of these questions self evident if you practiced mindfulness daily and applied it. Therapists must have a different intellectual description of this practice.
When we meditate/mindfully, we go beneath the cognitive half of our brain connecting to the other hemisphere ( right side). There is no judgment, no right or wrong, good or bad or damage self image.
As Jill Bolte Taylor describe when a stroke shut down her left hemisphere in a four hour period, life was euphoric, ultimate bliss. Everything was connected. She could not tell when in the shower, where her arm began and the wall ended. Her Rolodex was a bunch of pixels no words even.
The question posed is so limited when describing mindfulnesses power with our mind.
We are perfect on this side, our true self, Everytime we use mindfulness, deeply the connection between the hemispheres grows with the blood and electricity involved with practice. What fires together wires together.
We become a little more equinamimous each time we set. It is an accumulative practice where shifts are not linear. If you you trust your true self, issues will be brought forward when we are ready to integrate them.
this ability to direct our attention to the present moment is the most powerful ability we can access. It has melted my childhood abuse, then filled in the voids with affirmations and staying present. We are responsible for our effort in the face of fear, doubt or worry, results are a pay grade way beyond us.
Sandy, Play Therapy and Psychotherapy says
Mindfulness training is foundational to meaning healing practices. Once established as a way of life, all manner of difficulties dissolve and the path appears.
mia angela barbera, ICF- ceritifed mindfulness-based onotological coach, social worker, physiologist says
You bet, including myself. Clients spontaneously notice their language and rephrase in gentler more curious language. Clients practice miming (slow 10%), instead of fighting against what is happening when they can’t sleep, struggle to follow through on intentions, etc. Try getting angry slowly – worked great for a client. They also lose weight “without the usual food restrictions and exercise. One woman deeply touched me when she shared that she had become the person she thought she could only be after losing 100 lbs – light, playful, expansive and clear how to meet her needs. As in “The Art of War”, she was victorious before the “battle”. “The best battle is the one never fought.” One of her personal practices was to imagine holding her stomach with tenderness, as a great treasure, inspired by a Thich Nhat Hahn practice for anger. This all works with depressed clients. Brain-drain is gone, they feel lighter and sleep well and approach needed community more easily. I hope this is helpful. Warmly, Mia
Arthur Gillman, Mathematician (abstract algebras) says
This research finding merely rediscovers the results published nearly a century ago by Frank Plumpton Ramsey (“Ramsey Sentences”) in mathematical logic. What can we do to narrow this information-transfer gap between gown and town? /Arthur Gillman/ arthur.gillman@gmail.com