According to Paul Gilbert, PhD, we have three types of emotion regulation systems – we’ve got the Threat System, the Drive System, and the Soothing System. Now when a client is stuck in a painful cycle of self-criticism and shame, it’s often because these three systems are out of balance. You see, many clients spend […]
One Key Insight That Can Help Clients Undo Years of Blame and Shame
As practitioners, we’re well-acquainted with the fight, flight, freeze response – that automatic response that evolved to protect us from external threats or danger. But what happens when the threat is internal? When the threat is painful emotions or distress? Our response can still be automatic, and for many clients it can often be to […]
One Common Mistake Practitioners Make That Can Heighten a Client’s Shame
Working with a client who struggles with deep feelings of shame can often be a delicate and nuanced process . . . . . . and according to Peter Levine, PhD, there’s one mistake practitioners sometimes make that can send clients even further into shameful feelings. Here, Peter will share what that mistake is – […]
How to Reframe a Client’s Relationship with an Inner Critic
A toxic inner critic can often trap our clients in painful patterns of shame, or sometimes leave them frozen in fear. But according to Rick Hanson, PhD, the inner critic can also serve an important function. So how can we help clients counteract a harsh inner critic in order to experience healing and growth? In […]
Working with Clients Who Feel "Never Good Enough"
People constantly compare themselves against messages they receive from friends, family, media, and our culture. And those messages often contribute to feelings of “never good enough”: Not attractive enough. Not intelligent enough. Not thin enough. Not successful enough. For many of our clients, they’ve encountered these types of messages from a very young age, and […]