How Compassion-Oriented Therapies Work and What Makes Them So Effective
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with Christopher Germer, PhD;
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with Christopher Germer, PhD; Dennis Tirch, PhD; Geshe Lobsang Tenzin Negi, PhD; Paul Gilbert, PhD;
Kristin Neff, PhD; Jack Kornfield, PhD; Susan Pollak, MTS, EdD; Christopher Willard, PsyD; Ruth Buczynski, PhD and Ashley Vigil-Otero, PsyD
Sign up for a Gold Package
So interesting to see how so many different therapeutic models add richness and depth to the compassion focussed therapy framework. Lots of lightbulbs going off in my head giving shape to different interventions I can use with clients. Thank you so much for offering this free.
Thank you! I really enjoyed the clarification of the internal threats and how different stages in the nervous system have specific presentations. I will try the self compassion breaks with myself and my pts, and return more frequently to loving kindness.
I think I will keep the phrase ¨ can you HOLD that with compassion¨? Also, other ways in which I will say that are ¨Can you OPEN UP to the fact that you didn´t choose this?¨. Thanks, loved it.
Thank you, I will use some of these practices in an hour with a client trapped in shame. Really appreciate the video. Also appreciate your generosity.
Reframing, stepping back from the memory or current situation seemed like a powerful tool.
I especially liked learning about the strategies to address self compassion in the Self Compassion Break. Also liked the symbol of suffering = pain times resistance.
This is a good teaching tool. Explanation of the internal stressors of the three Fs was also very helpful. I appreciate receiving all the strategies. I live in SD far from any of these
presenters, so being able to access these webinars is extremely helpful for me. Thank you for offering these free.
Thank you for providing this helpful module. I find all aspects of it quite simple enough to transfer to practice. One of the many significant things that caught my attention is the mention and some focus on the mental capacity/capabilities that a person is born with (not their fault), which in turn affects how they view their world, thereby giving recognition to, in my opinion, nature/nurture. I find that a lot of researches tend to point accusing fingers at parents/primary caregivers leading people (clients) to strongly view as enemies those who could be their biggest support (parents, family, caregivers) while professionals cheer on these beliefs. I have seen too many clients alienate themselves from their support and deepen their sufferings as a result. It makes me so sad. This mention of mental capacity/capability thus provide some hope.
I’m starting in clinical practice. And with this webinar, i will investigate more about the strategies they presented. I clarify
That my english is not very good, but i understood most of what they said.
Thanyou very much for doing ir for free. I have clearer many things.
Regards from Asunción-Paraguay
It is so good to be reminded of the loving kindness meditation. I heard about it years ago and share it often.
I really liked hearing about how internal stress shows up and naming it with the same labels of an external threat which makes it easier to learn and teach others. So looking forward to helping my clients with shame and next weeks session.
I purchased the gold package on this topic as it is relevant for all my clients that are caregivers with harsh inner critics to do more and feel guilt and shame for not doing enough.
With thanks to the team!
Thank you for this opportunity to see this free video cast. It was very helpful. I like the the idea of self talk before sleep – and self compassion with intention.I found the following the phrases helpful to think about and use- ‘you didn’t choose where or who you were born to or the circumstances that have happened’ . ‘We need to be calm to heal’ resonates with me. Thanks so much for this freebie! Love it!
For a hostile client resisting any connection like an anorexic teen or some MICA wreck who is mandated to therapy, these techniques seem a bit later in the therapeutic path. Some ability to have an insightful thought seems necessary although all the strategies look fantastic for people who can go slow enough to catch on.
Thank you for this series. I missed the first session but this one has my mind churning on how many ways this information can enhance my practice both with individuals and group therapies. I am a licensed professional counselor as well as art therapist working with at risk kids in a runaway and homeless youth shelter. So many ideas are generating in my head – thank you
Mindful practice of SEAT is so.powerful! And the language to use in loving-kindness meditation can make an important shift toward self-compassion! I will try it with youth I work with in Mental Health and Addictions Program. It is also trauma informed!
Tonight‘s program was excellent and so inspiring. The power of compassion has always been apparent to me but not so well expressed and demystified as it was in today’s program. I especially appreciated Dr. Neff’s self disclosure with a story of her autistic son. I’m looking forward to the rest of this program. I will use this information tomorrow with a client I have who is suffering with shame.
Three powerful takeaways for me. The first recognising that the fight flight or freeze threat, when turned inward , becomes self criticism , isolation and rumination. The second is about the power of loving kindness meditation to build self compassion…and the option of offering a client in distress some key phrases to use… May I be safe , may I be healthy, may I be peaceful , may I live with ease…And finally being able to meet the gaze of your client with loving eyes and ask “can you hold that with compassion?”…So simple but so powerful. I already use the self compassion break and would like to understand better how to use the reality check.
Thank you NICABM. Found it really helpful to hear how other practitioners apply SC/ACT. Can easily integrate all the examples into CBT and EMDR sessions as appropriate
I think projecting the inner critic and then to get an image of your compassionate friend, your compassionate self will be helpful .Also to defuse events by saying that they are only happening in the mind. These ways of changing perception can really change a person. As well as knowing the thoughts come and go. Lin Smallwood
I work with teens and learning about the harshness of their inner critics. I now have a strategy to teach them about the metaphor of the old brain and new brain, go through mindfulness practices using the SEAT model, name and tame, and especially teach them about the compassionate self as the alternative to the critical self, and introduce the self-compassion break….
Thank you so much for this being available for free. I have learned nearly all of this in training etc. and this has reminded me so well of the power of the work, as well as how to better and very practically bring it into sessions etc. So powerful. ?
The easiest concept for me to apply is the self compassion break: 1.Use of mindfulness, a recognition of struggle, 2. Common humanity, others are struggling too, 3 Self kindness.
Seat was good too
I would like to purchase this but cost may be prohibitive
Mindful SEAT is great way to talk about externalizing thoughts
Thank you very much. It is quite affirming.I am a physician who uses self-compassion and mindfulness for myself and my clients but I haven’t thought about using loving-kindness specifically when people are suffering. I will try that today!
I will practice more self-compassion exercises with my clients in session instead of just telling them about the X, Y, Z exercise. As always, so grateful to be able to learn through this platform. Daniela Ramos
Help clients turn their inner critic into their inner therapist.
Thank you so much for this rare opportunity and for offering the sessions for free!
I enjoyed it I have a head injury that had left me out in left field it’s been 13 months now and I am slowly finding my norm. I am also a victime of severe domestic abuse. Which I was well stalked 4 many years being America INDIAN and SIOUX. It’s been very hard. So many woman 0n reservation don’t get help.no money left in a state of great f difficulties.
The showing/comparing of internal threats – many impacts on us in the style of the more well-known – external threats and fight, flight or freeze. The self-critic, self-isolation and over-identification and fusion responses were an epiphany for me in that context. Thank you to all the researchers for your work and curiosity.
I would like to share a beautiful poem on compassion I found https://hellopoetry.com/poem/2933328/compassion/
Compassion
When you are swept over by sorrow
And your night is forlorn
When your hours are reigning pain
My compassion will be there.
When everything is taken
And your attachments are all broken
And you’ve squandered your daily bank of seconds
My compassion will be there.
When rage and retaliation strike home
Alienation, isolation sings loud
When the thoughts are like a spinning whirling twisted train with the most perverse of engineers
And the tracks lead to endless night
My compassion will be there.
When love has slipped through your fingers again
And you’re in the deepest hole you’ve ever known with only a shovel
And your fingers can’t grip
And it can’t be fixed without a ladder
And there is no ladder anywhere
My compassion will be there.
Whether you’re too young or too old
Whether your world is
Expanding or contracting
My compassion will be there.
Countless life stories
Many echoing rooms
The human condition played out
In infinite permutations
When I have nothing else to say
And nothing else to give
As best I can
My compassion will be there.
Yes! This was a very useful and easy to follow session. (But the articles flashed up were too tiny to read). I find a lot of my clients and patients who belong to the population I researched at The University of Melbourne entitled: “Lives Unseen: Unacknowledged Trauma of Non-disordered, Competent Adult Children Of Parents with a Severe Mental Illness” have enormous difficulties in self compassion. (Google my name: Suzette Misrachi and you’ll get this research). These individuals are challenged by any kind of loving self acceptance. Often it’s because they were heavily criticized by their attachment figures and often were “parentified” (see my short article on this in medium.com). I feel that the more we are able to be self-compassionate towards ourselves as therapists, the more we are able to extend such a resource to others. It has to begin somewhere… and it cannot remain as a theoretical construct. It’s gotta be super-duper real!
Thank-you for sharing this broadcast at no cost
I am a mother,who has 3 children neurologically effected through substance abuse I have taken various courses they often experience flight and fight and I have found their emotions get out of control.
I know I will find it helpful to teach them what they can learn from what their senses are telling them ;
and to learn to recognize and regulate
their emotions
Many Thanks
Patricia
I missed the first session on Neurobiology of Compassion, as I was away. I have clinical backgrund & I also have a history of severe trauma from years of Domestic violence (my adult son has experienced this too). I was very distressed to see that the feature of being able to pause replays to simply absorb the information, & also fill in my notes, has been removed in this series. I have purchased previous NICABM webinars, however I am no longer able to do this, due to significant financial hardship in my family. I had previously praised this valuable feature & I wonder if this may contributed to its removal (in the name of profits from Gold Subscriber sales). Now, my only option is to re-listen to the replay later today or Thurs while time constraints are a huge issue for me. My son & I have worked long & hard at trying to overcome trauma triggers, while we continue to experience very high & ongoing level of adversity & obstacles on an almost daily basis. I was excited to learn about this series, as we have only ourselves to rely on as supports. So self-compassion (S.C.) is essential to our survival. I am now totally exhausted after trying to absorb this info. today & take frantic notes, with no option to pause. This is so discouraging, as the S.C techniques were very helpful to hear. I am left with a dilemma – do I continue to tune into the remaining 2 modules, or forgo them altogether, as the race to write down the info. may be more detrimental to my SNS overdrive than not tuning in at all!! Interested in comments from others on this matter!
I missed the first session on Neurobiology of Compassion, as I was away. I have clinical backgrund & I also have a history of severe trauma from years of Domestic violence (my adult son has experienced this too). I was very distressed to see that the feature of being able to pause replays to simply absorb the information, & also fill in my notes, has been removed in this series. I have purchased previous NICABM webinars, however I am no longer able to do this, due to significant financial hardship in my family. I had previously praised this valuable feature & I wonder if this may contributed to its removal (in the name of profits from Gold Subscriber sales). Now, my only option is to re-listen to the replay later today or Thurs while time constraints are a huge issue for me. My son & I have worked long & hard at trying to overcome trauma triggers, while we continue to experience very high & ongoing level of adversity & obstacles on an almost daily basis. I was excited to learn about this series, as we have only ourselves to rely on as supports. So self-compassion (S.C.) is essential to our survival. I am now totally exhausted after trying to absorb this info. today & take frantic notes, with no option to pause. This is so discouraging, as the S.C techniques were very helpful to hear about, but I could not take notes so quickly. I am left with a dilemma – do I continue to tune into the remaining 2 modules, or forgo them altogether, as the race to write down the info. may be more detrimental to my SNS overdrive than not tuning in at all!! Interested in comments from others on this matter!
Unlike “The Secret”‘s advice to avoid troubled people because their negative energy is toxic or contagious,
this shows that compassion towards oneself (and others – last week), is good for everyone!
I will use this in teaching.
First of all THANK YOU for offering this for free, may you and your families receive in return much love and kindness forever!
As a professional dietitian a do counselling with pregnant woman at psychosocial risk and talking about food brings up so much about their emotional and relationship challenges. I have been learning to have a holistic approach to clients but did no have the words for it- this training has given me the language and concepts to help women acknowledge their humanity, normalize their imperfections, and learn to love themselves in a meaningful deep way that will impact not only their physical but mental and spiritual health. I work with refugees and new immigrant women struggle with so many issues in Canada, I hope I can use this knowledge will help open their heart and minds to new way of life.
I cannot thank you enough.
I love the closing about helping clients embrace their humanity with a heart that is spacious, kind and free.
In addition I want to share that This information will transform my personal life and help me support close family struggling with depression and suicide ideation.
There was much in the podcast that was very useful and educative for me. I selected one simple message: “we only heal in the para-sympathetic state. We need to be calm to heal”. Although I had previously known about the importance of Paul Gilbert’s “Soothing Emotional System” this comment really resonated with me today. I remember once talking with a nurse as I lay in bed in hospital recovering from an operation. She was talking about the importance of sleep. She made the point that in their experience the best mending of the wounds from the operation occurred during periods of deep sleep. It seems to me that the message above points out how emotional and physical healing seem to follow similar patterns. Both need ‘soothing’ states.
Excellent information and some extremely useful ways to deal with self criticism. Most of my clients have a inner critical self constantly judging and attributing blame. These are some wonderful ideas to change their perspective to a more compassionate and kind way of thinking. We as practitioners also often fall in the trap of self criticism and blame and need to use these ourselves to be more kind to ourselves which will thereby enhance our practice and enhance our compassion to self and to our clients. Could be used with colleagues in supervision.
Thank you so much for this! Such an invaluable reminder of the strategies and concepts that have been brought together so nicely and it has given me ides of how i can share these with clients in more structured ways. I intend to practice integrating loving kindness meditations more actively into my sessions and with myself too!
I am working with a young man, in his late 20’s, who reports his sleep has been disturbed for years. He sounds hopeless and feels worthless. I would love to be able to support him in growing a sense of worthiness and to understand and practice of self-compassion. He is so shut down and I am also working to build a circle of support for him. His parents expectations are unhelpful. Any thoughts are welcome. Thank you for this webinar. Robin Zucker, Boston
The encouragement to express simple loving kindness words with compassion is a helpful reminder.
Thank you for making these modules so practical, research based, and available for free. They are very helpful. I particularly liked the idea of the conversation with the inner critic. I will use that this week. The inner critic is such a common human experience, and is overall harmful not helpful!
Thank you so much for an enlightening and inspirational session
Message and resources
For me everything has been transforming and i cannot wait to start working with CFT
however if i had to choose one think itt would be the thtee stepmindfulness break
Thank you so much
Thanks, that was very interesting. I already work with compassion in my practice but it was inspiring to be given specific exercises to help clients learn to apply compassion to themselves. I particularly liked Paul Gilbert’s description of how he helps clients explore their inner critic awaken their inner compassionate voice and then use that to understand what fear and shame the inner critic is hiding / running from. I definitely want to try using that with clients, as it seems very powerful. Thanks again.
Very informative, useful, worthwhile and inspiring. Many thanks, I’m looking forward to module 3.
Thank you so much for sharing these tools with us. There is so much here that I love! I think the biggest take home message for me is that simple guidance can make such a difference opening up perspective-taking. There is NO reason not to do it and it can be done with ease, multiple times per day. Thank you to all teachers for being so practical and helpful!
I’m excited to try offering and leading folks through athe Self Compassion Break. And I’m going to try it myself as well. Might post it up as a reminder.
These sessions are so valuable and insightful! As a person with first-/second-hand experience and researcher in this field, I always learn something new each session. I look forward to adding new insights to my research area and learning more to assist others.
Thank you so much for making this available without charge. I have a chronic mental health problem and am finding them invaluable. Dennis Tirch – thank you. I love the analogy of the glass of I’m a weirdo! So useful…..
There is so much that I liked and will use: Mindful SEAT; psycho-ed. about the Internal Threat System and its connection with the Amygdala’s fight, flight or freeze responses; little compassion breaks and their three parts. What really stands out is the idea that core beliefs, such as “everyone thinks I’m weird” don’t have to be changed, but rather can be diffused! However, a thought like that is probably a projection of that person’s own belief that s/he IS weird. So, is Dr. Tirch saying that diffusion can be used to change core beliefs? It seemed that he was. Then, there is something that I would add, which is that thinking about the inner critic as a Protector, a la Internal Family Systems Therapy, means that therapists might need to also ask clients “what does the Critic want to protect you from?” – if that fits your client’s situation. Asking what the Critic worries about, is and has been hurt by, etc. can get close to that, but I think asking directly is best. Using Loving Kindness Meditation to help the Critic and the whole person to feel safe seems like a very helpful idea, again tailored to the client’s needs.
I will be helping my client to name the emotions behind the shame, feelings of inadequacy and being put down by others. This is where the feelings of being stuck for years with this hinders formation of good relationships. I think it will be helpful to start teaching the client how to accept that this is happening within/internally and what might be helpful in dealing with these feelings to shift the client to action mode and the possibility of taking control of the situation.
Forgot to mention very important aspect for me. As an Art Therapist, the idea of Thank the Mind made me already plan a series of drawings describing the Critic, and another the image of the what you would like it to look like. Often by puting down on paper an image rather than just words, it is more authentic and individual and meaningful to the person drawing. witnessing and sharing the immages often allows the client to come up with their own solutions which are personnaly helpful to them.