Thanks Tara, I appreciate your insights. I believe this exercise will be helpful in getting in touch with some of the sorrow that is also linked to and carried by our regret for behavior impacted by shame.
Clients often say that they fear accepting self and practicing self compassion because it’s like “letting themselves off the hook” and they fear getting more out of control with negative behavior. I appreciate the encouragement that we must be faithful in creating a practice of self forgiveness and compassion … over time it changes us.
Laura Smyth, Another Field, Wilmington , DE, USAsays
These videos have helped me to realize that my relationship with myself affects my relationships with others. I found them to be very helpful in my journey.
I tried forgiving myself but I feel so strange. I feel like it’s not real and I don’t feel forgiven. Perhaps my stubbornness is in the way. But maybe I have to go through the action many times until I can feel the authenticity.
Thank you sharing your wisdom about forgiveness. Self-forgiveness seems a monumental task when you find yourself repeating the regrettable behavior. It appears to be a cycle that feeds on the energy of guilt, shame & remorse.
Very helpful useful transforming information. Thanks for the videos and content made available for free. Makes me hopeful of the future ? since this is exactly what we need more than ever. Relationships are key and woven into every fabric in our lives. So to create healthier ones is key. Thanks again.
I especially appreciate the opportunity to forgive/accept myself for past transgressions and see them as an opportunity to recognize the seeds/foundation feelings that they are rooted in
So simple and so easy to practice myself and then teach to my clients. Thank you for helping me to heal and how to help my clients change how they feel about themselves.
Recently, Self comments have included, why would others want to be with me when I wouldn’t want to be with myself. The trance of unworthiness journey has been long and drawn out. I’m ready to pull that wheel out of the wheel rut and begin a new more loving journey, for myself and those around me. Thank you Tara.
Often I feel a subtle disconnection with others thinking I might make the same mistake again. For me this inquiry expanded to, “How would I look, act and feel if I forgave myself fully.” That visualization and embodiment of my future forgiven self brings a feeling of connection and openness with myself and others.
I went back to my home country after my studies, leaving my best friend behind when she was having a really hard time. Forgiving myself would help being kinder towards myself and might allow me to get close with a friend to that level again.
If I forgive myself for not being totally nice to my father, I can see him without having to keep up myself when I am with him and hopefully I can relax more in his company
Thank you Tara for showing me that there is another place that I can live in besides my thoughts. That shifted my point of view and brings me much more inner peace every day. Thank you for always asking the right questions!
Thank you for this generous and heartfelt series for NICBM. I found that when I sat with forgiveness for myself whilst holding someone in mind that I feel I have hurt in the past, I experienced that person as less difficult or threatening and felt a sense of gentleness toward them without it having to come from a place of guilt.
My words and actions recently hurt a very dear friend. I have apologized on several occasions. She has not responded to my apologies. I miss her terribly and feel very lonely without her in my life.
By forgiving myself I know that I have done all that I can do. I feel more at peace by forgiving myself.
I connected with self judgement towards a very hurt and sad part. I will try and fine more opportunities for self compassion and forgiveness. This will deepen my work with clients. Thank you Tara!!
Wow, I have struggled on and off to feel connected to my husband and felt very guilty about that. I realise that I am not connected to my self and have no compassion with myself. This part helped me to understand the importance of self acceptance and self forgiveness in order to love myself and others. Thank you.
I LOVE what Tara shares about Healing self Judgement – Our inner judge has a good intention . Examine the limiting beliefs . Listen to the Body Thank you
I will absolutely be using this in my daily practice with clients .
Dear Tara, This is an unfoldning realization: I have felt so guilty about not loving my son enough, not having given him the heartfelt support he could so have needed, often been harsh with him, judgmental. And also a bit caught up in this: The fear of being incapable of loving which has been self-fulfilling and drenched in frustration. I am just coming to realize, that when I give myself space and some care and compassion, love comes natural. I will hold to this precious seed.
My sister, recently widowed, lives in fear of hurricanes (in the Fl Keyes), not feeling physically safe alone, and fear for her two brothers catching COVIG and leaving her alone in the world. I know she is in a trance of unworthiness following his death, and I have struggled to know how to help her. I feeling guilty I cannot engage her in what I know in mindfulness or meditation, and I felt inadequate in guiding her with loving kindness, compassion, and equanimity. Now I know this is not true, and it is not my fault.
Somehow , most of the time, i can forgive myself about past actions where i harmed knowingly and also unknowingly my growing son …. My level of consciousness was different then . But he has hard time forgiving me . And, when we see each other his impatience towards me remind me constantly about how wrong i have been , despite my deep efforts to correct the present and my many apologies . Often , he can be rude towards me , and i try to make him respect me . But when i say anuthing he gets mad and will say that if he is angry it is because i thought him so . Therefore, it brings me back to theses moments where i was ignorant and made mistakes and i m right back in my suffering and have hard time accepting the past and moving on and beleiving that i am now a better person . This entire situation make me very sad . I know it is impermanent but it is also a vicious circle . Thanks again for sharing these free video it help alot . Truly ,
Opening to self condemnation and the underlying pain and vulnerability that’s part of life opens us up to our humanity and that of others….
Thank you, Tara, for your gentle heart and compassionate way of Being.
Patricia Van Santen, Medicine, Palm Desert, CA, USAsays
When I forgive myself I am able to hear more of the truth of what is happening with my patients rather than hearing through my own unresolved issues and projections. Thank you.
I found this series to be very insightful and powerful.
Simple to use with clients and generally beneficial personally – sometimes we need to remember to be vulnerable as counsellors.
Thank you.
Thank you very much, Tara, for these beautiful videos! As long as I haven’t forgiven myself I have imprisoned myself and the other person, since I am limited to see myself through my judgmental eyes and I project from this point of view my judgement onto the other. Forgiving myself is freeing myself and opening up my perception for what I am and for what the other person is.
Thank you Tara, for your insights on the power of vulnerability and self-acceptance–beautifully packaged in 3 parts … a great reminder that when we experience and model the courage to face our own fears and “flaws,” we heal ourselves and encourage others to do the same.
Christina Thomas, Counseling, San Diego, CA, USAsays
As I tried this exercise myself, with a particularly difficult relationship in my life, I felt I could forgive myself. However, my mind would wander back to the ‘damage’ that may have been done and if that person would truly be able to forgive and allow for a new, healthier relationship to emerge between the two of us?
It is so easy to be compassionate with others, yet how do we get that for ourselves if we have so often heard the message that we are not enough, we are the problems. There is such a disconnect between the rational knowledge and the feelings.
I feel a lot of inspiration to forgiveness. I would love to know the exercise Sam did❤️??
I found these videos to be very informative.
Thanks Tara, I appreciate your insights. I believe this exercise will be helpful in getting in touch with some of the sorrow that is also linked to and carried by our regret for behavior impacted by shame.
holding onto self judgement makes my body tight. I felt my legs soften when you offered acceptance. Soften and open rather than hold and contain.
Ruby
Clients often say that they fear accepting self and practicing self compassion because it’s like “letting themselves off the hook” and they fear getting more out of control with negative behavior. I appreciate the encouragement that we must be faithful in creating a practice of self forgiveness and compassion … over time it changes us.
These videos have helped me to realize that my relationship with myself affects my relationships with others. I found them to be very helpful in my journey.
I would not feel so lonely and disconnected from my family.
I tried forgiving myself but I feel so strange. I feel like it’s not real and I don’t feel forgiven. Perhaps my stubbornness is in the way. But maybe I have to go through the action many times until I can feel the authenticity.
Thank you sharing your wisdom about forgiveness. Self-forgiveness seems a monumental task when you find yourself repeating the regrettable behavior. It appears to be a cycle that feeds on the energy of guilt, shame & remorse.
i can imagine being able to be more honest with this person in a genuinely enquiring sort of way, rather than nastily angry.
Very helpful useful transforming information. Thanks for the videos and content made available for free. Makes me hopeful of the future ? since this is exactly what we need more than ever. Relationships are key and woven into every fabric in our lives. So to create healthier ones is key. Thanks again.
Huge transformation in self forgiveness
I especially appreciate the opportunity to forgive/accept myself for past transgressions and see them as an opportunity to recognize the seeds/foundation feelings that they are rooted in
I would no longer have to keep the rest of the world at arm’s length.
So simple and so easy to practice myself and then teach to my clients. Thank you for helping me to heal and how to help my clients change how they feel about themselves.
Recently, Self comments have included, why would others want to be with me when I wouldn’t want to be with myself. The trance of unworthiness journey has been long and drawn out. I’m ready to pull that wheel out of the wheel rut and begin a new more loving journey, for myself and those around me. Thank you Tara.
Often I feel a subtle disconnection with others thinking I might make the same mistake again. For me this inquiry expanded to, “How would I look, act and feel if I forgave myself fully.” That visualization and embodiment of my future forgiven self brings a feeling of connection and openness with myself and others.
I went back to my home country after my studies, leaving my best friend behind when she was having a really hard time. Forgiving myself would help being kinder towards myself and might allow me to get close with a friend to that level again.
If I forgive myself for not being totally nice to my father, I can see him without having to keep up myself when I am with him and hopefully I can relax more in his company
Thank you Tara for showing me that there is another place that I can live in besides my thoughts. That shifted my point of view and brings me much more inner peace every day. Thank you for always asking the right questions!
Thank you for this generous and heartfelt series for NICBM. I found that when I sat with forgiveness for myself whilst holding someone in mind that I feel I have hurt in the past, I experienced that person as less difficult or threatening and felt a sense of gentleness toward them without it having to come from a place of guilt.
Genuine forgiveness could help my clients build deeper relationships that the were prevented from building by the chains that held them down.
I really appreciate these videos. Thank you Tara.
My words and actions recently hurt a very dear friend. I have apologized on several occasions. She has not responded to my apologies. I miss her terribly and feel very lonely without her in my life.
By forgiving myself I know that I have done all that I can do. I feel more at peace by forgiving myself.
Thank you for these great little clips! Much gratitude
I connected with self judgement towards a very hurt and sad part. I will try and fine more opportunities for self compassion and forgiveness. This will deepen my work with clients. Thank you Tara!!
this is so prescient for me, personally and professionally. as ever with Tara, i am learning things i can apply directly to my life.
Wow, I have struggled on and off to feel connected to my husband and felt very guilty about that. I realise that I am not connected to my self and have no compassion with myself. This part helped me to understand the importance of self acceptance and self forgiveness in order to love myself and others. Thank you.
Thank you very much for these videos.I like the fact that they are brief and to the point.
I LOVE what Tara shares about Healing self Judgement – Our inner judge has a good intention . Examine the limiting beliefs . Listen to the Body Thank you
I will absolutely be using this in my daily practice with clients .
Mary , Mental Health Nurse Therapist , AB Canada
Wonderful wisdom listening to Tara!
Bringing compassion to ourselves is powerful in so many ways & helps us open to others.
Dear Tara, This is an unfoldning realization: I have felt so guilty about not loving my son enough, not having given him the heartfelt support he could so have needed, often been harsh with him, judgmental. And also a bit caught up in this: The fear of being incapable of loving which has been self-fulfilling and drenched in frustration. I am just coming to realize, that when I give myself space and some care and compassion, love comes natural. I will hold to this precious seed.
My sister, recently widowed, lives in fear of hurricanes (in the Fl Keyes), not feeling physically safe alone, and fear for her two brothers catching COVIG and leaving her alone in the world. I know she is in a trance of unworthiness following his death, and I have struggled to know how to help her. I feeling guilty I cannot engage her in what I know in mindfulness or meditation, and I felt inadequate in guiding her with loving kindness, compassion, and equanimity. Now I know this is not true, and it is not my fault.
Thank you this has been insightful!
Thank you very much Tara,
Somehow , most of the time, i can forgive myself about past actions where i harmed knowingly and also unknowingly my growing son …. My level of consciousness was different then . But he has hard time forgiving me . And, when we see each other his impatience towards me remind me constantly about how wrong i have been , despite my deep efforts to correct the present and my many apologies . Often , he can be rude towards me , and i try to make him respect me . But when i say anuthing he gets mad and will say that if he is angry it is because i thought him so . Therefore, it brings me back to theses moments where i was ignorant and made mistakes and i m right back in my suffering and have hard time accepting the past and moving on and beleiving that i am now a better person . This entire situation make me very sad . I know it is impermanent but it is also a vicious circle . Thanks again for sharing these free video it help alot . Truly ,
Can hardly wait for the guided meditation. This is all so enlightening. very applicable
Genuine forgiveness would create more courage to speak up and out in the dangerous world.
Opening to self condemnation and the underlying pain and vulnerability that’s part of life opens us up to our humanity and that of others….
Thank you, Tara, for your gentle heart and compassionate way of Being.
Relationships are a mirror of myself. When I love myself relationships will be loving.
When I forgive myself I am able to hear more of the truth of what is happening with my patients rather than hearing through my own unresolved issues and projections. Thank you.
They can open up their hearts. They can dare to be vulnerable. Thus enable connection with others.
Just to allow myself to stop the running around and BE in touch with what is is a gift…thank you
Thank you Tara
I found this series to be very insightful and powerful.
Simple to use with clients and generally beneficial personally – sometimes we need to remember to be vulnerable as counsellors.
Thank you.
These videos were wonderfully thoughtful and being the state of the world a great time to be heard.
Thank you very much, Tara, for these beautiful videos! As long as I haven’t forgiven myself I have imprisoned myself and the other person, since I am limited to see myself through my judgmental eyes and I project from this point of view my judgement onto the other. Forgiving myself is freeing myself and opening up my perception for what I am and for what the other person is.
Thank you Tara, for your insights on the power of vulnerability and self-acceptance–beautifully packaged in 3 parts … a great reminder that when we experience and model the courage to face our own fears and “flaws,” we heal ourselves and encourage others to do the same.
As I tried this exercise myself, with a particularly difficult relationship in my life, I felt I could forgive myself. However, my mind would wander back to the ‘damage’ that may have been done and if that person would truly be able to forgive and allow for a new, healthier relationship to emerge between the two of us?
Thank you!
I felt a softening, a warming of my heart. I opened my heart to myself and the person I felt some guilt with.
It is so easy to be compassionate with others, yet how do we get that for ourselves if we have so often heard the message that we are not enough, we are the problems. There is such a disconnect between the rational knowledge and the feelings.
I find the whole series powerful and useful in my work