Thanks for this exercise!! The remaining hurt felt like a square hard box infront of my soft hearth. And feeling sorry its still there eventhough smaller than before. Need to go on working with it with myself, and my clients.
as I placed my palm over my heart, in an instant tears came, warm wave went through my head and something around sternum melted. there was a deep breath filling a space that have not breathed for a long years.
I can actually value my self.
I can actually know I’m perfectly imperfect.
I can actually love my self.
Thank you for giving my a system to get to my heart space.
Nina Mongiello, Teacher, SOUTH LAKE TAHOE, CA, USAsays
I felt sadness for myself that I’m still in this place of pain. I see that this is a practice that will be extremely beneficial, but in the moments of suffering I tend to forget this kind of work and it keeps me stuck. My hope is that if I practice this enough it will come naturally. Thank you Tara
I felt a tight squeeze in my chest, after a while felt love and kindness to my heart. I will practice this more with my client as it’s validates my feelings with self. I am enough there way I am, love myself enough as well.
I found a deep sadness at the heart centre and while it is sad it also feels like release…acceptance and peace. Sometimes all a client needs is the touch of a loving hand
When I put my hand on my heart and felt compassion and care for myself, what came up next was how much I wish others would show me that kind of caring. People are generally friendly and kind to me, but it feels surface level. I need the deep intimacy of being with someone who really gets me and cares for me in the way I felt when I put my own hand on my heart.
After practicing this exercise, I felt the love of the Lord as I am reminded that I am loved, cherished and a Child of God.
I love this 3 step exercise! I have done similar with using the waves in the ocean as a visual for clients, but adding that gesture of compassion and kindness along with this was so awesome! Thank you:)
Dear Tarah,
I have listened to you for many years. It is the first time to watch. I’ve hoped to be in DC sometime to meet with you (though my family is from DC; I live in Latvia).
Radical Acceptance and Self-Acceptance are still some of my go-to audiobooks.
Thank you for taking the time to make this gift. So many desperately need these reminders, buoys in a stormy sea.
Joan Sullivan, Psychology, Wellesley , MA, USAsays
After performing this intervention on myself, i immediately felt unconditional love of myself, despite my concerns that I had had an integral role in damaging my relationship with someone who I very much love. Hopefully, feeling self-love will allow me to overcome obstacles to closeness in the aforementioned person I love.
I appreciated the information about the areas of the brain that are affected by self judgement. And that being conscious of our thoughts and naming our feelings activates a different part of the brain that can help us open u to understanding and healing our self judgement.
Thank you Tara for this rich resource. Such depth within these bite size nuggets.
Sitting with my hand on heart, at first awkwardness, then judgement of my imperfect self compassion, I lightened & chuckled with myself, tried out a few phrases to feel how they resonated with my heart. The empowerment of this talk allowed me to accept my suffering without judgment which opened the door to feeling into the warmth on my hand, imagining a hug & then the phrase ‘ I believe in you ‘ floated from the depths quite unexpectedly
Your voice and wisdom are as always a balm for the soul & this course gold with such potential to enrich this world
Self compassion and forgiving brings relief, softness, kind of moisture to rough, dry, harsh environment. But sometimes the fear comes: what if I end up condoning or tolerating hurtful behavior ? What will help me if I am trying to forgive me ( or the other person who I am trying to forgive), to practice successful, helpful refrain from hurtful behavior ? My experience tells me that forgiving decreases such behavior overtime, but sometimes it takes several cycles.
How to be patient with self and others: forgive, understand limitations but also aspire to do better ?
This was not easy. I did feel a slight lessening in my heart of the burning feeling I have with the depression . I know that I must continue to observe, practise and repeat mindfulness and self love. Thank you Tara.
Difficult to feel self-compassion – so I have decided to do self-compassion training every morning as part of morning meditation. Thank you, Tara and all of you.
Thank you for reminding me that self compassion is a practice. Just now with hand on my heart a familiar judgement came up again for me. Years ago something I said/did to a lifelong friend who was hurting terribly from a relationship rupture with her partner caused her to disconnect from me entirely. Each time I tried to apologize somehow I did it wrong. I’ll never know because for 25 years now she refuses to speak to me. I can guess that I shared too much of my process in my apology? I will never know. I’ve moved on and love her still as a lifelong friend. Yet, like a thorn it is stuck in my heart and my list of great losses.
A couple things that I discovered for myself are what I like say is “That which we can distinguish, we can extinguish.” and “That which you can give voice to loses its power over you.”
Thank you for this reminder of self compassion. I was very faithful in doing self compassion, but have recently been very sporadic with my practice of this. I have noticed a negative shift in my self criticism & will get back to my practice of self compassion.
Following a blow out yesterday with my adult daughter, I blamed myself for not doing/being enough for her. Pragmatically untrue; emotionally devastating. I did the final step to move from self-criticism to self-love. I felt better. I see that his process can work and will take time.
Thanks for this exercise!! The remaining hurt felt like a square hard box infront of my soft hearth. And feeling sorry its still there eventhough smaller than before. Need to go on working with it with myself, and my clients.
as I placed my palm over my heart, in an instant tears came, warm wave went through my head and something around sternum melted. there was a deep breath filling a space that have not breathed for a long years.
I can actually value my self.
I can actually know I’m perfectly imperfect.
I can actually love my self.
Thank you for giving my a system to get to my heart space.
I felt sadness for myself that I’m still in this place of pain. I see that this is a practice that will be extremely beneficial, but in the moments of suffering I tend to forget this kind of work and it keeps me stuck. My hope is that if I practice this enough it will come naturally. Thank you Tara
I felt a tight squeeze in my chest, after a while felt love and kindness to my heart. I will practice this more with my client as it’s validates my feelings with self. I am enough there way I am, love myself enough as well.
I found a deep sadness at the heart centre and while it is sad it also feels like release…acceptance and peace. Sometimes all a client needs is the touch of a loving hand
Every time I tap in to express love to myself in a sincere way, tears spring to my eyes and I want to cry but I have no idea why.
When I put my hand on my heart and felt compassion and care for myself, what came up next was how much I wish others would show me that kind of caring. People are generally friendly and kind to me, but it feels surface level. I need the deep intimacy of being with someone who really gets me and cares for me in the way I felt when I put my own hand on my heart.
Feelings of sadness, and missed opportunities.
I would say the kindness gesture practice give me a sense of calm healing and wholeness
thank you for your clear and concrete advices, Lili
After practicing this exercise, I felt the love of the Lord as I am reminded that I am loved, cherished and a Child of God.
I love this 3 step exercise! I have done similar with using the waves in the ocean as a visual for clients, but adding that gesture of compassion and kindness along with this was so awesome! Thank you:)
Thank you so much for this, it gives me a map for ways to work on these same insecurities, and gives me hope…for the first time.
Dear Tarah,
I have listened to you for many years. It is the first time to watch. I’ve hoped to be in DC sometime to meet with you (though my family is from DC; I live in Latvia).
Radical Acceptance and Self-Acceptance are still some of my go-to audiobooks.
Thank you for taking the time to make this gift. So many desperately need these reminders, buoys in a stormy sea.
I could feel my heart opening to my own soul and beating more regularly.
After performing this intervention on myself, i immediately felt unconditional love of myself, despite my concerns that I had had an integral role in damaging my relationship with someone who I very much love. Hopefully, feeling self-love will allow me to overcome obstacles to closeness in the aforementioned person I love.
Simply giving myself permission to feel and accept and not to try too hard – to let the feeling be there is a huge step and feels good – a relief
I appreciated the information about the areas of the brain that are affected by self judgement. And that being conscious of our thoughts and naming our feelings activates a different part of the brain that can help us open u to understanding and healing our self judgement.
thanks so much
Thank you Tara for this rich resource. Such depth within these bite size nuggets.
Sitting with my hand on heart, at first awkwardness, then judgement of my imperfect self compassion, I lightened & chuckled with myself, tried out a few phrases to feel how they resonated with my heart. The empowerment of this talk allowed me to accept my suffering without judgment which opened the door to feeling into the warmth on my hand, imagining a hug & then the phrase ‘ I believe in you ‘ floated from the depths quite unexpectedly
Your voice and wisdom are as always a balm for the soul & this course gold with such potential to enrich this world
Self compassion and forgiving brings relief, softness, kind of moisture to rough, dry, harsh environment. But sometimes the fear comes: what if I end up condoning or tolerating hurtful behavior ? What will help me if I am trying to forgive me ( or the other person who I am trying to forgive), to practice successful, helpful refrain from hurtful behavior ? My experience tells me that forgiving decreases such behavior overtime, but sometimes it takes several cycles.
How to be patient with self and others: forgive, understand limitations but also aspire to do better ?
This was not easy. I did feel a slight lessening in my heart of the burning feeling I have with the depression . I know that I must continue to observe, practise and repeat mindfulness and self love. Thank you Tara.
Difficult to feel self-compassion – so I have decided to do self-compassion training every morning as part of morning meditation. Thank you, Tara and all of you.
so challenging…
Thank you for reminding me that self compassion is a practice. Just now with hand on my heart a familiar judgement came up again for me. Years ago something I said/did to a lifelong friend who was hurting terribly from a relationship rupture with her partner caused her to disconnect from me entirely. Each time I tried to apologize somehow I did it wrong. I’ll never know because for 25 years now she refuses to speak to me. I can guess that I shared too much of my process in my apology? I will never know. I’ve moved on and love her still as a lifelong friend. Yet, like a thorn it is stuck in my heart and my list of great losses.
A couple things that I discovered for myself are what I like say is “That which we can distinguish, we can extinguish.” and “That which you can give voice to loses its power over you.”
Thank you for this reminder of self compassion. I was very faithful in doing self compassion, but have recently been very sporadic with my practice of this. I have noticed a negative shift in my self criticism & will get back to my practice of self compassion.
Following a blow out yesterday with my adult daughter, I blamed myself for not doing/being enough for her. Pragmatically untrue; emotionally devastating. I did the final step to move from self-criticism to self-love. I felt better. I see that his process can work and will take time.
I like it and will use it with clients. Thanks!