Forgiving myself makes me know I’m ok, I’m not a defective person who can’t get it right, I am whole and worthy of loving , fulfilling connection with others.
I deeply resonated with the question how self-hatred can help you to be a better person? Although the answer seems obvious but many people still holds on to their self-criticism thinking that it can help them to become a better person.
Very emotive, vulnerable like a child in deep need for love and nurturing in real tangible held form, plus comforting words. I know it’s important that all this comes from Self, but I’ve been deprived of this in multiple interactive levels. Thankyou
Hope Karimi-Sheumaker, Another Field, SANTA ANA, CA, USAsays
By Not forgiving myself, I’ve been punishing myself, inflicting pain/hurt over and over. Forgiving myself releases the self induced hurt, lifts massive layers of pain from my heart and soul. It opens my heart and makes me feel more loving and caring for myself and others by extension.
My main shame and guilt stems from having a monetary advantage over others by birth. This separates me emotionally from others of my chosen circle. Am I resented? So I hide!!
Your videos have helped pull me out of deep, dark and scary trances of unworthiness. I share your videos and books with everyone through work and personal life. You’re one of the few teachers to really understand the somatic experience that occurs. Too often therapy will just keep the DSM empowered and there’s no refuge in that.
Releasing the self blame and perception of self as intrinsically flawed, facilitates an expanded sense of who they truly are, the ocean and with that vision of self, the heart is softened is softened and opened and all thoughts, speech and action flows from that place of greater peace and equanimity (rather than from the judging mind). Thank you Tara, I love your work 🙂
Releasing the self blame and perception of self as intrinsically flawed, facilitates an expanded sense of who they truly are, the ocean and with that vision of self, the heart is softened and opened and all thoughts, speech and action flows from that place of greater peace and equanimity (rather than from the judging mind). Thank you Tara, I love your work 🙂
Seeing self forgiveness from the prospective mentioned in the video. Gives me a new prospective on self-acceptance.
Although I have a very strong self-critic who wants to take control, siting with “It is not your fault” may allow self-compassion to arise within me and know that I have always tried my best and done what I could with what I knew and my capabilities at the time and it is okay to forgive myself (even in relation to anger whether that be vented towards myself or others).
I forgive myself for getting in the relationship that has fallen apart. Why did I not see the narcissist? There is a lot of pain they have caused that I allowed to some degree. We are both moving on. I practice more self love these days.
As I thought about the situation that has been tainted with guilt, and said to myself “It is not your fault”, I sensed a weight lift off of my chest.. thank you Tara
By realizing that I am the way I am because of my genes, the way I was brought up, and my experiences, I can observe with more kindness how I feel and think, and this helps me become less defensive.
By forgiving myself I can feel more loving and open to learning and loving in that relationship I felt guilty in. Liberating, being open, smiling, relief
Marianne Beckwith, Other, Scotts Valley, CA, USAsays
I can’t remember a time where someone close or not said a kind compassionate thing to me where I actually believed them. So therefore when I say a kind compassionate comment to anyone I actually think I’m not convincing or believable. So how do I treat myself compassionately and believe it?
I felt this warmth when placing my hand over my Heart – sensing that this may be helpful on a deeper level: reminding myself that i take care of myself.
That image of a mother and child also speaks to me.
Thank you for this.
Forgiving myself allowed me to feel more love, helped me to understand that I did the best I knew at that moment. It felt like a cool breeze, a relief, freedom…
I allowed myself to relate from another perspective, a freer perspective, in a more loving space
Working with a client who suffers with self-hatred and will try this exercise with her. Most helpful video thank you Tara, appreciate you taking the time and effort to put these series together.
I have been meditating consistently since August , 2019. I do a blend of vipassana and metta. Recently I have been easily able to do metta for myself. That came up for me several times as I worked with the loving friend piece. Thank you, Tara
Thank you, Tara!! Your free teaching videos are wonderful and we appreciate your generosity in sharing them! Am sharing them with family and friends as well as in work-related settings. Appreciate your kind gentleness!
Encouraging self forgiveness, as opposed to self blame, opens the heart to self acceptance, the starting point for all change. It finds the place on the map from which to begin, to reach the desired destination.
Ginny Mullen, Another Field, Burlington, VT, USAsays
If I can forgive myself, I can more easily forgive others. Sharing forgiveness with myself and others opens the doorway out of the prison I have been inhabiting,
Forgiving myself makes me know I’m ok, I’m not a defective person who can’t get it right, I am whole and worthy of loving , fulfilling connection with others.
Self acceptance brings a feeling of release.
I deeply resonated with the question how self-hatred can help you to be a better person? Although the answer seems obvious but many people still holds on to their self-criticism thinking that it can help them to become a better person.
I feel softer and lighter in my perspectives and very caring towards others, listening with a deeper intent and much more compassion.
Very emotive, vulnerable like a child in deep need for love and nurturing in real tangible held form, plus comforting words. I know it’s important that all this comes from Self, but I’ve been deprived of this in multiple interactive levels. Thankyou
All of these teachings were so helpful personally and I can see how helpful they would be to my clients.
I am eager to learn more.
In a deep part of me feeling great despair in my 30 year marriage, I am willing to be curious as to why.
Blessings…
By Not forgiving myself, I’ve been punishing myself, inflicting pain/hurt over and over. Forgiving myself releases the self induced hurt, lifts massive layers of pain from my heart and soul. It opens my heart and makes me feel more loving and caring for myself and others by extension.
Forgiving myself is helping me to be more loving and understanding of the other person.
Thank you ..deep seated feelings of not enough are very challenging to overcome ..I realise some of the projection is holding me back from connecting
thanks
My main shame and guilt stems from having a monetary advantage over others by birth. This separates me emotionally from others of my chosen circle. Am I resented? So I hide!!
Self-acceptance & self-compassion begets acceptance & compassion towards others
Your videos have helped pull me out of deep, dark and scary trances of unworthiness. I share your videos and books with everyone through work and personal life. You’re one of the few teachers to really understand the somatic experience that occurs. Too often therapy will just keep the DSM empowered and there’s no refuge in that.
Releasing the self blame and perception of self as intrinsically flawed, facilitates an expanded sense of who they truly are, the ocean and with that vision of self, the heart is softened is softened and opened and all thoughts, speech and action flows from that place of greater peace and equanimity (rather than from the judging mind). Thank you Tara, I love your work 🙂
Releasing the self blame and perception of self as intrinsically flawed, facilitates an expanded sense of who they truly are, the ocean and with that vision of self, the heart is softened and opened and all thoughts, speech and action flows from that place of greater peace and equanimity (rather than from the judging mind). Thank you Tara, I love your work 🙂
Seeing self forgiveness from the prospective mentioned in the video. Gives me a new prospective on self-acceptance.
Although I have a very strong self-critic who wants to take control, siting with “It is not your fault” may allow self-compassion to arise within me and know that I have always tried my best and done what I could with what I knew and my capabilities at the time and it is okay to forgive myself (even in relation to anger whether that be vented towards myself or others).
This has been a good reminder to fight my inner critic.
I forgive myself for getting in the relationship that has fallen apart. Why did I not see the narcissist? There is a lot of pain they have caused that I allowed to some degree. We are both moving on. I practice more self love these days.
As I thought about the situation that has been tainted with guilt, and said to myself “It is not your fault”, I sensed a weight lift off of my chest.. thank you Tara
By realizing that I am the way I am because of my genes, the way I was brought up, and my experiences, I can observe with more kindness how I feel and think, and this helps me become less defensive.
The heart center warms and radiates.
By forgiving myself I can feel more loving and open to learning and loving in that relationship I felt guilty in. Liberating, being open, smiling, relief
I can’t remember a time where someone close or not said a kind compassionate thing to me where I actually believed them. So therefore when I say a kind compassionate comment to anyone I actually think I’m not convincing or believable. So how do I treat myself compassionately and believe it?
The anger is often an attempt to protect but in fact does the opposite
When we are kinder and forgiving to ourselves, we can be kinder and more compassionate to others.
Still working on this. Forgiving myself for negative self talk opens up more opportunities
Not sure yet. I chose someone who is linked to trauma
It is marvellous how it opens up to more joy and happiness
I felt this warmth when placing my hand over my Heart – sensing that this may be helpful on a deeper level: reminding myself that i take care of myself.
That image of a mother and child also speaks to me.
Thank you for this.
Very helpful, thank you!
I felt as if I had “wasted time” and it would have been better to air this guilt instead of trying to hide it.
Forgiving myself allowed me to feel more love, helped me to understand that I did the best I knew at that moment. It felt like a cool breeze, a relief, freedom…
I allowed myself to relate from another perspective, a freer perspective, in a more loving space
Thank you for this material.
Working with a client who suffers with self-hatred and will try this exercise with her. Most helpful video thank you Tara, appreciate you taking the time and effort to put these series together.
Thank you for putting this into such clear words
Thank you.
I know I defensiveness is a shield to protect my vulnerability
I always appreciate Tara Brach.
After I forgive myself I am more able to start new and look forward. Thank you so much Tara 🙏
Self acceptance and forgiveness feels like a long slow process
I have been meditating consistently since August , 2019. I do a blend of vipassana and metta. Recently I have been easily able to do metta for myself. That came up for me several times as I worked with the loving friend piece. Thank you, Tara
Thank you
Roseleen
My scenario is forgiving myself for not being a perfect mother. I certainly tried my best.
Very interested in knowing the major obstacle when you have truly hurt yourself and others
Thank you, Tara!! Your free teaching videos are wonderful and we appreciate your generosity in sharing them! Am sharing them with family and friends as well as in work-related settings. Appreciate your kind gentleness!
It feels very warm hearted to feel self compassion and forgiveness
Avoiding the grief underneath reactive anger – wow, that really impacted me.
Encouraging self forgiveness, as opposed to self blame, opens the heart to self acceptance, the starting point for all change. It finds the place on the map from which to begin, to reach the desired destination.
If I can forgive myself, I can more easily forgive others. Sharing forgiveness with myself and others opens the doorway out of the prison I have been inhabiting,
When you forgive yourself you can contact the other person in a new open way and something different can happen.