By just reducing the fear & stress of the coming meeting/interction, I’m already half way to feeling/seeing the person I have a difficult time with… & thus entering a “bigger & caring space”
Self hatred and forgiving ourselves is so huge in the abortion recovery ministry I serve in. I wish they could all learn this skill to stop hating themselves, have some compassion for themselves and forgive themselves
The presentation showed the possibility of individual development through self forgiveness / acceptance / compassion. From the example given, Self-forgiveness seems to have provided a window of selfawaress for the client that led him to opt for responding rather than reacting to triggering situations.
Trance of unworthiness
Vengeance a lazy way of dealing with grief
These words opened a door for me in how to understand family member!
Thank you for your guidance always wise words!!
These three videos have really resonated with me. They have really made me think differently about how I’m am with other people mainly family members and how they are and have been with me. Tara puts it in a very nice way and easy way to understand with helpful tips.
Thank you again and again for reminding me – I am worth of being loved and of loving myself with all my imperfections.
I am good as I am (and even while writing this there is a small voice insider asking “really?”).
Thank you Tara, I liked the wise saying… vengeance is a lazy form of grief.., I had not though of this and the connection between lashing out and a loss of some kind, it provided me an important source for reflection.
Thank you, Tara. I have been working for a number of years at forgiving myself for my part in a fractured relationship with a family member, and am still finding it very challenging. I find that at times I can *almost* forgive myself, but then it changes again and I almost feel back to square one. I look forward with gratitude to any tips or strategies you may share.
Self forgiveness is key to have healthy relationships with others. Thank you for sharing Sam’s story, especially in relationship with his father’s response to his own self hatred. Very useful information.
I’ve noticed my self-hatred for a while now but don’t feel like I have the ability or the right to let it go. I think that focusing on the fact that forgiving myself will help the relationships with the people around me might be what I need to do to heal. Thank you.
It will change the relationship with deeper connection and care, with respect for myself and my partner. It will begin the healing process to self-acceptance and improvement in positive, thoughtful response rather than emotional reaction.
Thank you. I know there are underlying feelings, frustrations that manifest in my interaction with my significant other. I need to let go of past failures. Alice
Very helpful insight for break patterns from childhood suffering, Appreciate examples of how we buried pain-stress and fear, then showing how it presents.
Thank you for the tools.
Being aware of how I treat and intereact with others. I am aware I’m reacting with the example of how my father put me down as a young child and later. I need to love myself more and his treatment of me was not my fault, it came from his feelings of inadequacy.
It makes sense when you say that the way we relate to others is exactly we deal with ourselves. Self forgiveness makes difference which is difficult for many of my clients
Most forgiveness techniques I’ve come across are about forgiving others. Self forgiveness is so essential to experiencing self love and self acceptance 🙏
When i hold my self in kindness about a terrible mistake i made, triangulating with a coworker and my manager, trying to help him include her in our meetings more, i notice my rage and self hatred at myself for living with shunning behaviour from her, because she somehow realized what i did, softens the littlest bit. I’m doing what i saw my mom and sisters do with me – not talking to her directly, but tyring to control by having others act differently. And it blew up in my face and now my lovely coworker can barely stand to look at me.
I have never believed in forgiveness as such, as it seems to presume an unequal relationship and holds a lot of judgement. However, when you talk about it, I see it differently. And even though my mind chooses to reject the idea of forgiveness, it is certainly an issue for me on a subconscious level, tied up with shame and unworthiness when I lose my temper or behave “badly”. Thank you again for your insights and the concept of “not being your fault” is certainly helpful as I have always had a terrible temper and it has often rumbled up from nowhere, like a volcano, when I am trying my best to be good natured, etc!
Genuinely forgiving myself could change my relationships by making me more open and forgiving to others. More loving and kind. I really want to help myself bring about that change.
Thank you. I dropped into a feeling space with the words ‘its not your fault’. It helped to feel compasion, briefly. I went back to busy mind again, even writing this.
The more acceptance, understanding and compassion for ourselves and telling ourselves it’s not our fault, the more relaxed we are. When the shame and self judgments are released from this self compassion, there is more willingness to be vulnerable and connect authentically in our relationships.
Relationships get better Much tension with a family member who raged, apologized, raged, apologized and apologized for the apologies. The intensity and relentless guilt, shame, blame affected a number of people. Understanding the situation brought little relief. It seemed knots were getting tighter. He remembered about his childhood with a rageful parent and began to see that in some way response with rage was learned and not entirely his fault. Forgiveness was the experience that he and we needed. It changed life. Energy and attention was changed. Life has become better. I’m grateful for the learning. Thank you everyone.
Thank you Tara
It’s very helpful
Makes me think about my
Mom and my childhood
Yours truly
Dan
By just reducing the fear & stress of the coming meeting/interction, I’m already half way to feeling/seeing the person I have a difficult time with… & thus entering a “bigger & caring space”
Very kern to hear Tara Brach given the significance of shame held within and how to move it outside of us –
Very interesting. I’d like to get to know more.
Self hatred and forgiving ourselves is so huge in the abortion recovery ministry I serve in. I wish they could all learn this skill to stop hating themselves, have some compassion for themselves and forgive themselves
Thank you for this valuable information.
Helllo,
I started to write what I though you all needed to hear but stopped and realised
‘I am enough, this brief comment is enough’ thank you Tara
The presentation showed the possibility of individual development through self forgiveness / acceptance / compassion. From the example given, Self-forgiveness seems to have provided a window of selfawaress for the client that led him to opt for responding rather than reacting to triggering situations.
A great tool in therapy practice
Thanks a lot for sharing…
Rajesh
Trance of unworthiness
Vengeance a lazy way of dealing with grief
These words opened a door for me in how to understand family member!
Thank you for your guidance always wise words!!
Thank you Tara for your wisdom and teaching❤️
These three videos have really resonated with me. They have really made me think differently about how I’m am with other people mainly family members and how they are and have been with me. Tara puts it in a very nice way and easy way to understand with helpful tips.
Thank you again and again for reminding me – I am worth of being loved and of loving myself with all my imperfections.
I am good as I am (and even while writing this there is a small voice insider asking “really?”).
Thank you so much
I enjoyed the presentation by Dr. Brach. We often forget to discuss self forgiveness with our clients.
Very helpful … thank you
Thank you Tara, I liked the wise saying… vengeance is a lazy form of grief.., I had not though of this and the connection between lashing out and a loss of some kind, it provided me an important source for reflection.
Thank you, Tara. I have been working for a number of years at forgiving myself for my part in a fractured relationship with a family member, and am still finding it very challenging. I find that at times I can *almost* forgive myself, but then it changes again and I almost feel back to square one. I look forward with gratitude to any tips or strategies you may share.
Self compassion
Self forgiveness is key to have healthy relationships with others. Thank you for sharing Sam’s story, especially in relationship with his father’s response to his own self hatred. Very useful information.
I’ve noticed my self-hatred for a while now but don’t feel like I have the ability or the right to let it go. I think that focusing on the fact that forgiving myself will help the relationships with the people around me might be what I need to do to heal. Thank you.
It will change the relationship with deeper connection and care, with respect for myself and my partner. It will begin the healing process to self-acceptance and improvement in positive, thoughtful response rather than emotional reaction.
Thank you. I know there are underlying feelings, frustrations that manifest in my interaction with my significant other. I need to let go of past failures. Alice
Tara is amazing in her work
Thank you 🙏
Self beliefs are so very limiting!
Very helpful insight for break patterns from childhood suffering, Appreciate examples of how we buried pain-stress and fear, then showing how it presents.
Thank you for the tools.
Being aware of how I treat and intereact with others. I am aware I’m reacting with the example of how my father put me down as a young child and later. I need to love myself more and his treatment of me was not my fault, it came from his feelings of inadequacy.
Thank you.
It makes sense when you say that the way we relate to others is exactly we deal with ourselves. Self forgiveness makes difference which is difficult for many of my clients
Warmth and comfort
These trainings are wonderful – thank you.
I really need this anti-shame tool
Gratitude
Acceptance
Learning, acceptance of my imperfections.
Caring and kind with my imperfections
Sharing my thoughts & feelings
Capable of hearing another
Accepting my thoughts and feeling fear fear.
Learning ❤️
Most forgiveness techniques I’ve come across are about forgiving others. Self forgiveness is so essential to experiencing self love and self acceptance 🙏
I felt relief. And lightness. A path to peace
I’m going to keep doing it. Thank you.
I felt comforted, safe and cozy. Thank you
I can pause before reacting
Found So much sadness around this
This meditation helps you move toward-self forgiveness and healing, talking back to shame.
Thank you so…. Much Tara. The gift of awareness. Yes, these tools will help me
To be a better person today then I was yesterday. Amen,🙏❤️
Freedom
When i hold my self in kindness about a terrible mistake i made, triangulating with a coworker and my manager, trying to help him include her in our meetings more, i notice my rage and self hatred at myself for living with shunning behaviour from her, because she somehow realized what i did, softens the littlest bit. I’m doing what i saw my mom and sisters do with me – not talking to her directly, but tyring to control by having others act differently. And it blew up in my face and now my lovely coworker can barely stand to look at me.
Thanks so much .
Forgiving is a step that will be helpful, I believe that Tara is right..
And yet, ther is still IA ginderance, that is not so easy to be felt, and integrated to be able to forgive. . .
Ther is this voice, I could have decided / acted better .. And ther is a fault .
It is very similar to the sinn in Christian church..
And yet, i do know it is a responsibility I have, that is not denied of I forgive,..
Ther is a difficult mingling of thoughts and emotions that stört up and are a hindrance to forgiving…
So. Erhaps the meditation might lead a bit further.
Thanks so much Tara,
Suza
Thanks.
I have never believed in forgiveness as such, as it seems to presume an unequal relationship and holds a lot of judgement. However, when you talk about it, I see it differently. And even though my mind chooses to reject the idea of forgiveness, it is certainly an issue for me on a subconscious level, tied up with shame and unworthiness when I lose my temper or behave “badly”. Thank you again for your insights and the concept of “not being your fault” is certainly helpful as I have always had a terrible temper and it has often rumbled up from nowhere, like a volcano, when I am trying my best to be good natured, etc!
It could allow for more acceptance and openness. Thank you, Tara.
It led to me feeling lighter and hopeful.
Genuinely forgiving myself could change my relationships by making me more open and forgiving to others. More loving and kind. I really want to help myself bring about that change.
Thank you. I dropped into a feeling space with the words ‘its not your fault’. It helped to feel compasion, briefly. I went back to busy mind again, even writing this.
But the moment was lovely.
Thank you
The more acceptance, understanding and compassion for ourselves and telling ourselves it’s not our fault, the more relaxed we are. When the shame and self judgments are released from this self compassion, there is more willingness to be vulnerable and connect authentically in our relationships.
Relationships get better Much tension with a family member who raged, apologized, raged, apologized and apologized for the apologies. The intensity and relentless guilt, shame, blame affected a number of people. Understanding the situation brought little relief. It seemed knots were getting tighter. He remembered about his childhood with a rageful parent and began to see that in some way response with rage was learned and not entirely his fault. Forgiveness was the experience that he and we needed. It changed life. Energy and attention was changed. Life has become better. I’m grateful for the learning. Thank you everyone.