I’ve been imprisoned by my fear for most of my adult life. I don’t know who I would be. Free to explore who I was before this fear overtook my physical body and spirit.
Nero-plasticity thank God … real but not true … 💜🙏🏽🧘🏽♀️🕯🧘🏽♀️🙏🏽💜 definitely interest in the six week line course so long as it’s not outrageously expensive 💜💜💜 thank you
I would do more of what made me feel good and healthy – wouldn’t compromise my eating habits and would have greater self-control because I would not let indecisiveness or other people be prioritized over my own needs.
I would be friendly yet firm, I wouldn’t allow myself to be taken advantage of. I would be braver when it came to standing up for myself and I would be more open to holding self accountable and acting in my best interests.
I think I would love people I care about better; and I wouldn’t think I was such a hazard to society. I would have more faith in myself; in things working out; in abundance, joy. And I would feel more. Be present more. Want to be here more.
I would be closer to myself, know myself more deeply if I got through my fear.
🙏🏻 thank you. Fear is so debilitating and we pass it on with our insecurities. Who would I be if I didn’t believe something was wrong with me? Free to enjoy life! Thank you
II would be a nice person who could freely engage with people. I am 87 and widowed; I belong to a grief support group for those who have lost their spouses but my fear keeps me from
socializing and gaining the possibility of new friends which would put an end to my painful isolation.
If I didn’t believe something was wrong with me I would be jumping in to living fully each day. I would return to traveling, dancing, painting, wearing beautiful clothes. I would stop wasting precious time with self doubt and shame…and fully release the traumatic programming behind
those beliefs. I would be enriching my life with new experiences instead of playing small and living repetitive patterns. I would know and celebrate my worth…and find increasing joy and peace.
Without fear, I am creative. I finish things that truly call me and let go things I no longer truly want to do. I take care of myself and thrive in every part of life. I love the phrase, “real but not true.”
I am currently working with a client with low self-belief. I will teach her to use the phrase, “real but not true” to begin to fill her deconditioning tool belt.
If I didn’t believe something was wrong with me I wouldn’t be afraid that I would be unlovable, afraid of failure. I would be able to believe that I am good enough as I am, and worthy of being loved, able to trust and fully live others
More alive and enjoying life. Appreciating everything I still can do given health challenges and stopped my popping and trance. This question hit me to the core!
I’ve believed that there was something wrong with me my whole life. It never occurred to me that it would be possible to let go of that belief. It would be amazing. I get a “lightening” sensation just contemplating the possiblity.
Thank you very much for this wonderful information Tara and nicabm.
I have observed that many of my clients have self-doubts as a product of an internalization of negative narratives from their social environment, together with an external locus of control in which the reality coming from outside is not questioned and reflected.
I think that some of the external criticisms can be taken as opportunities to learn, and others that are not supported by a rational sense or a beneficial intention, can be omitted, always highlighting our nature of qualities and virtues.
Also some limiting beliefs such as not considering the possibility of change and not recognizing the strengths in oneself to promote improvement, are frequent in self-doubts.
In my personal case, I have been in a continuous learning about my strengths and my limitations, and as I have advanced in my interests, I have been developing and cultivating more the traits that allow me to achieve what I want to be.
I’d be more adventurous and much less self-centered. I’d be more present to my life. I’d be more available to others. My main fear as I age is around illness and death. I wonder if this class would be helpful with that? Could you speak to that please, Tara?
I’d be more adventurous and much less self-centered. I’d be more present to my life. I’d be more available to others. My main fear as I age is around illness and death. I wonder if this class would be helpful with that? Could you speak to that please, Tara?
Kate Thompson, Medicine, Port Orchard , WA, USAsays
If I didn’t believe there was something wrong with me, I would explore and try on so many new experiences and ask for help and guidance instead of never beginning for fear of failure. I am consumed by fear of failure.
Wow, this couldn’t have come at a more timely moment… The naked truth is, I don’t really know who I’d be if I thought differently about myself. Low self-esteem and self-doubt have been my shadow for as long as I can remember, and although I know my self-worth (and there are many things I love and appreciate about myself), self-doubt is keeping me small and in the shadows. So for now I’m just bawling my eyes out…
I would be compassionate with myself; someone who could accept that my son has a serious mental illness that I did not cause.
I am grateful for the information you have shared.
I love what you are saying but would “imagined (ie. and therefore neurophysiologically real) but not (objectively) true” be more apt than “real but not true” as when the amygdala feels the fear it is, on a physiological level at least, real and true especially with flashbacks and PTSD. And while we want to decondition the client/person to their trauma they may also need -on some level- to own the truth of their trauma (especially when it’s childhood trauma and maybe denied by a parent or adult). The amygdala has no sense of time and so the language could emphasize that fact…the body IS reacting but to the memory of trauma not to actual trauma in the here and now.
I would love your feedback so I can work through my own understanding of this valuable terminology.
Catherine Pittman, Psychology, Plymouth, IN, USAsays
I wouldn’t want to give up my fear, because it is a protective response. But I would like to reduce my anxiety.
Fear occurs when there is a genuine threat. Anxiety is how we refer to the very real feeling that there is some kind of threat–when the situation may not actually pose a threat.
“Real but not true!”.This is what I never thought about! It brings me joy when I repeat it…when I understand that my brain makes me believe something that is not true, simply because it’s real.
Looking forward to a liberating way of living with knowing the truth and become free of fear.
Who would I be if I didn’t think something was wrong with me? I would be new, freer, stronger, grittier. I could tenderly embrace the great sadness of our time (in my heart and in others) with the faith that I can work in right relation with the world. I could find and free the pearl only I have to offer the world, that is hidden in the rough places. I could relax in my aging body with tenderness and pride. I love the image of the heart with a cape flowing behind. We can’t all live epic lives — but if I didn’t believe that something was wrong with me, I could live into my own-sized heroic life with contentment.
Thank you for sharing this meaningful program.
I would enjoy everything un my life more.
I’ve been imprisoned by my fear for most of my adult life. I don’t know who I would be. Free to explore who I was before this fear overtook my physical body and spirit.
Profound wisdom but easier said than done!
I wouldn’t have a heavy heart. I’d be free to express who I really am. I would be able to take on anything and thrive.
Nero-plasticity thank God … real but not true … 💜🙏🏽🧘🏽♀️🕯🧘🏽♀️🙏🏽💜 definitely interest in the six week line course so long as it’s not outrageously expensive 💜💜💜 thank you
I would do more of what made me feel good and healthy – wouldn’t compromise my eating habits and would have greater self-control because I would not let indecisiveness or other people be prioritized over my own needs.
I would be friendly yet firm, I wouldn’t allow myself to be taken advantage of. I would be braver when it came to standing up for myself and I would be more open to holding self accountable and acting in my best interests.
I think I would love people I care about better; and I wouldn’t think I was such a hazard to society. I would have more faith in myself; in things working out; in abundance, joy. And I would feel more. Be present more. Want to be here more.
I would be closer to myself, know myself more deeply if I got through my fear.
🙏🏻 thank you. Fear is so debilitating and we pass it on with our insecurities. Who would I be if I didn’t believe something was wrong with me? Free to enjoy life! Thank you
II would be a nice person who could freely engage with people. I am 87 and widowed; I belong to a grief support group for those who have lost their spouses but my fear keeps me from
socializing and gaining the possibility of new friends which would put an end to my painful isolation.
I might be more outgoing, accept more invitations, be a little better at living.
Thank you for this program
If I didn’t believe something was wrong with me I would be jumping in to living fully each day. I would return to traveling, dancing, painting, wearing beautiful clothes. I would stop wasting precious time with self doubt and shame…and fully release the traumatic programming behind
those beliefs. I would be enriching my life with new experiences instead of playing small and living repetitive patterns. I would know and celebrate my worth…and find increasing joy and peace.
Thank you. It is a really powerful message to reflect on who I would like to be without fear
Without fear, I am creative. I finish things that truly call me and let go things I no longer truly want to do. I take care of myself and thrive in every part of life. I love the phrase, “real but not true.”
I am currently working with a client with low self-belief. I will teach her to use the phrase, “real but not true” to begin to fill her deconditioning tool belt.
Thank you
Most helpful! Thanks so much.
This is very helpful for many of my clients. I can only think their answers they would be better version of themselves…better parent, spouse, employee
If I didn’t believe something was wrong with me I wouldn’t be afraid that I would be unlovable, afraid of failure. I would be able to believe that I am good enough as I am, and worthy of being loved, able to trust and fully live others
I would be more present with my loved ones and more able to effectively support my daughter because fear would not be leading the way.
More alive and enjoying life. Appreciating everything I still can do given health challenges and stopped my popping and trance. This question hit me to the core!
I would be able to move forward in my life.
I’ve believed that there was something wrong with me my whole life. It never occurred to me that it would be possible to let go of that belief. It would be amazing. I get a “lightening” sensation just contemplating the possiblity.
I find these questions to ask your clients very helpful. Thank you!
I would be limitless and not be afraid to fail.
This is my learning now! Thank you.
More at peace with myself. Sense of feeling safe, connected. Less judgemental and trusting of myself and others.
Thank you very much for this wonderful information Tara and nicabm.
I have observed that many of my clients have self-doubts as a product of an internalization of negative narratives from their social environment, together with an external locus of control in which the reality coming from outside is not questioned and reflected.
I think that some of the external criticisms can be taken as opportunities to learn, and others that are not supported by a rational sense or a beneficial intention, can be omitted, always highlighting our nature of qualities and virtues.
Also some limiting beliefs such as not considering the possibility of change and not recognizing the strengths in oneself to promote improvement, are frequent in self-doubts.
In my personal case, I have been in a continuous learning about my strengths and my limitations, and as I have advanced in my interests, I have been developing and cultivating more the traits that allow me to achieve what I want to be.
Thanks.
Warm hugs
A relaxed and happy fun-loving person
I’d be more adventurous and much less self-centered. I’d be more present to my life. I’d be more available to others. My main fear as I age is around illness and death. I wonder if this class would be helpful with that? Could you speak to that please, Tara?
I’d be more adventurous and much less self-centered. I’d be more present to my life. I’d be more available to others. My main fear as I age is around illness and death. I wonder if this class would be helpful with that? Could you speak to that please, Tara?
I would certainly be a calmer and more grounded person. Working on it! Thanks very much for your guidance and support.
The successful woman I could have been if not let fear get the better of me.
What wonderful words and phrases to use with us all as we struggle with our many fears and self doubts
Looking forward to escaping fear.
If I didn’t believe there was something wrong with me, I would explore and try on so many new experiences and ask for help and guidance instead of never beginning for fear of failure. I am consumed by fear of failure.
I would be much more confident in my personal and professional relationships.
Thanks Tara, meaningful tool!
Nicole from Quebec
I would be without empathy and exist only in the confidence of self success
I would be happy, live fully in the present moment.
Wow, this couldn’t have come at a more timely moment… The naked truth is, I don’t really know who I’d be if I thought differently about myself. Low self-esteem and self-doubt have been my shadow for as long as I can remember, and although I know my self-worth (and there are many things I love and appreciate about myself), self-doubt is keeping me small and in the shadows. So for now I’m just bawling my eyes out…
I would put myself out there more and share more.
I’d be more present for the people in my life, I’d have more courage to take risks and try new things.
A more self assured person!
I would be compassionate with myself; someone who could accept that my son has a serious mental illness that I did not cause.
I am grateful for the information you have shared.
I love what you are saying but would “imagined (ie. and therefore neurophysiologically real) but not (objectively) true” be more apt than “real but not true” as when the amygdala feels the fear it is, on a physiological level at least, real and true especially with flashbacks and PTSD. And while we want to decondition the client/person to their trauma they may also need -on some level- to own the truth of their trauma (especially when it’s childhood trauma and maybe denied by a parent or adult). The amygdala has no sense of time and so the language could emphasize that fact…the body IS reacting but to the memory of trauma not to actual trauma in the here and now.
I would love your feedback so I can work through my own understanding of this valuable terminology.
I wouldn’t want to give up my fear, because it is a protective response. But I would like to reduce my anxiety.
Fear occurs when there is a genuine threat. Anxiety is how we refer to the very real feeling that there is some kind of threat–when the situation may not actually pose a threat.
I definitely would benefit from less anxiety.
Catherine P.
What a great beginning for personal growth!
I don’t know who I will be, and I am excited for the journey!
I would be a happy human.
“Real but not true!”.This is what I never thought about! It brings me joy when I repeat it…when I understand that my brain makes me believe something that is not true, simply because it’s real.
Looking forward to a liberating way of living with knowing the truth and become free of fear.
Who would I be if I didn’t think something was wrong with me? I would be new, freer, stronger, grittier. I could tenderly embrace the great sadness of our time (in my heart and in others) with the faith that I can work in right relation with the world. I could find and free the pearl only I have to offer the world, that is hidden in the rough places. I could relax in my aging body with tenderness and pride. I love the image of the heart with a cape flowing behind. We can’t all live epic lives — but if I didn’t believe that something was wrong with me, I could live into my own-sized heroic life with contentment.