This really made me think about who I would be… I would take bigger chances, do all the little day to day things that I make out to be bigger and harder than they probably are, and I’d be in a much better place overall. It makes me sad there I hold myself back because of my beliefs but I’m going to ask myself this on a regular basis to try and change that.
I would be free.I wouldn’t be contricted in my actions i.e. walking on egg shells. Out of this prison. I can feel the movement out of prison as I write this. I wouldn’t be so incapcitated.Thank you Tara.
I would be a ‘lighter’ person who would enjoy life more myself but also for my family. I would let my children fly off into the world without me worrying constantly (however I do challenge myself with these worries and they do fly off – but I pay the price with my anxiety ). I would not take life so serious and belief that I am more than capable in achieving things.
Without fear I would be living everyday welcoming the day, rather than ruminating over what was wrong with my life, my past, my”future”. I would be able to communicate more truthfully rather than fearing that I will be unloved if I value myself.
I would still be me but a more relaxed and adventurous me. I am not normally a fearful person but CoVid and advancing years has brought a lot of fear. If I could let it all go I would once more be the adventurous spirit I believe I was. I’d embrace the fullness of life, glory in its’ many twists and surprises, be more in the present moment knowing that this now is what counts. It is all that there is – just the present moment. Writing puts me at ease. I feel no fear. I feel I am consciously doing what I am meant to be doing. My thoughts flow and the tension flows out of me.
I would be less subjective to the doom and gloom narrative which is a constant drain in my thinking. I would be more confident to move through my day minus the paralysing judgment in every moment. I would embrace effortless living instead of the arduous task I feel at the start of each day, to simply get up and get started into the day. I would feel more comfortable in my intimate relationship, with my family and friends, minus the self scrutiny and the wait for it all to go wrong. Finally, as a student and teacher of A Course in Miracles, having no fear would help me reach the aim of this course, to accept the Atonement for ME! My self acceptance can only deepen my love for people and my counselling work.
Although fear is a natural phenomenon, at times it has prevented me from truly believing in myself and being myself because of fear of what others may think of me. This was inherited from my mother when I was growing up in the ’50s and ’60s, and ironically since covid and lockdowns I have been able to re-evaluate and offload large amounts of this fear and become more true to myself and hence happier. It must be said, however, that this journey can be painful and difficult as we are offloading what had become our ‘security blanket’. So be prepared for the struggle of letting go, and do not forget the benefits it will bring.
I would be a more adventurous and prolific artist (painter). I realize that what Keeps me out of venturing deeper in my work in my studio is fear of failure, judgement of others and humiliation from that perceived judgement. I need to turn and face the beast of that possibility. Even if my next work is a tostada failure, it is a step, an action toward a goal of something greater.
I have held myself hostage to be perfection and have always feared failure rather than embrace success. My standards now are set so high in this midst of pleasing others I have lost myself.
Who would I be? Fun, happy, mischievous, lovable, adventurous and fearless…..
Working towards it ……. with thanks to you.
Orla Dublin
Throughout my life, I’ve been conditioned to play it safe, usually because I feared the worst if I didn’t do so. This practical approach has for the most part kept me out of trouble, but it has also left me with numerous regrets. I feel like I’m not really LIVING and experiencing the richness and beauty in life, but simply going through the motions and EXISTING day to day.
It’s so very limiting to feel this sense of internal collapse into self doubt, these question are a gentle opening into a new potential reality, thanks
Without the mental straitjacket of fear, I would trust my body more and not feel so weak, more able to engage in physical activities I enjoy.
It would free up time and money from hamster wheeling between various treatments in a continous attempt to bring down the fear alarm from interoception and obsessive thinking.
I would become more of an anchor for myself, live life more in the present – increasing connection with people, animals and nature.
I would be more rested and not look so tired Recently I’ve gotten into an anxious bedtime state of not being able to go to sleep. Without this fear I’d be so much more alert and at peace throughout the day.
I am already a good and decent human being, but sometimes the fear is being triggered and I drag myself down into rumination.
The thing I find most hard with your steps is to locate the fear in my body. If I don’t find the place(s), how can I nurture and care?
Marie Cosgrove, Social Work, Philadelphia , PA, USAsays
I would be unstoppable. I often pause events in my life based on perceived failures. This is a huge burden to my creativity. It results in loss of confidence and incomplete projects and enhances the “ not good enough” narrative that is holding me from being excellent – and unafraid.
I actually don’t know who I would be without fear. Fear is so much a part of how I know myself. So I guess I would be stepping into the unknown. Perhaps death of a sort. Perhaps also an exploration of a part of myself I have ignored.
Without being weighed down and constrained by fear I am free to soar on the wings of inspiration and intuition. The nurturing feelings of compassion and kindness flow and spillover into sustained wellbeing and greater capacity to contain, nurture and be available to others. With the growth and expansion of heart space I feel gratitude and blessed to experience change is possible, therein realising my potential and dreams, uplifted and couraged to face and transcend fears when they arise.
Tara my deepest gratitude 🙏for your work, loveliness and the practical help and support you gift 🎁. Unwrapping and exploring the possibilities you invite us to share has been life changing. It’s a baton, like the relay runner I feel empowered and liberated to hand on to enable others to forge their own freedoms. THANK YOU. 😌 Namesta 🙏✨✨
I think I would have a wonderful sense of freedom – from the chains I loop around myself. Through my mindfulness practices this is starting to happen in many ways…. and it feels so good. Of course we are all flawed, but learning not to live in judgement of myself is something I want to keep working at, to be able to be more open to what life has to offer, and not hide in fear and anxiety! I am certainly keen to cultivate a fearless heart.
I would be calmer, freer, more relaxed. I would probably have more fun and take more risks. I would enjoy life more. I probably would need less rest and less self soothing. I would be less withdrawn.
I don’t think one can be completely free of fear, it’s an essential part of our being. I would like less of the irrational part that holds me back from social interactions and allow me to take a bolder part in my community.
The first thougt that came to my mind was about my grand doughter. I heared that she was not so happy to go back to school, and wonder what trubling thoughts she might have.
About Who would I be without fear, definitly a dancer, maybe a retiered dancer at my age.
Thank you for sharing your knoledge and spirit.
An excellent short video empowering clients to confront their fear, e.g. of failure, respond with compassion to the part of their physiology in which it resides and utilize the affirmation, ‘it’s real but not true’, and question ‘how would your life be without this problem?’ to break the debilitating trance of fear.
Dealing with anxiety most of my life. So habituated to the physiological response and ruminating thoughts. Desperate to break out of this destructive pattern .
kathleen stuart, Another Field, Calistoga , CA, USAsays
Lack of fear would help me in my quest for a lighter heart. I meditate on love, compassion and gratitude and feel that much of the time. I’m working on letting myself feel more joy and lightheartedness.
This really made me think about who I would be… I would take bigger chances, do all the little day to day things that I make out to be bigger and harder than they probably are, and I’d be in a much better place overall. It makes me sad there I hold myself back because of my beliefs but I’m going to ask myself this on a regular basis to try and change that.
I would feel the energy and competence to complete the duties of my new job.
Without the fear and self doubt I would enjoy the aliveness and preciousness of myself and life with deep ease and gratitude and most of all joy!
Feel more relax, comfortable, at ease in my body, confident, more present. More loving and accepting of myself.
I would just be a joyful,loving beeing!
What a relief,tensions could fall of.
Thank you very much for sharing so kindly
these deep insights.
Georg from Würzburg,Germany
I would be free.I wouldn’t be contricted in my actions i.e. walking on egg shells. Out of this prison. I can feel the movement out of prison as I write this. I wouldn’t be so incapcitated.Thank you Tara.
I would be a ‘lighter’ person who would enjoy life more myself but also for my family. I would let my children fly off into the world without me worrying constantly (however I do challenge myself with these worries and they do fly off – but I pay the price with my anxiety ). I would not take life so serious and belief that I am more than capable in achieving things.
Without fear I would be living everyday welcoming the day, rather than ruminating over what was wrong with my life, my past, my”future”. I would be able to communicate more truthfully rather than fearing that I will be unloved if I value myself.
Thanks Tara. Lots in that short video that struck a chord. I’ll now listen to the next videos you’ve made available.
Stella
p.s. I have a fear (ha ha ) of making my email address available to a wide audience so won’t fill in below if you don’t mind.
I would still be me but a more relaxed and adventurous me. I am not normally a fearful person but CoVid and advancing years has brought a lot of fear. If I could let it all go I would once more be the adventurous spirit I believe I was. I’d embrace the fullness of life, glory in its’ many twists and surprises, be more in the present moment knowing that this now is what counts. It is all that there is – just the present moment. Writing puts me at ease. I feel no fear. I feel I am consciously doing what I am meant to be doing. My thoughts flow and the tension flows out of me.
Thankyou Tara
Without limiting fear and anxiety I would be playful, wise peaceful creative going with the flow of life
I would be less subjective to the doom and gloom narrative which is a constant drain in my thinking. I would be more confident to move through my day minus the paralysing judgment in every moment. I would embrace effortless living instead of the arduous task I feel at the start of each day, to simply get up and get started into the day. I would feel more comfortable in my intimate relationship, with my family and friends, minus the self scrutiny and the wait for it all to go wrong. Finally, as a student and teacher of A Course in Miracles, having no fear would help me reach the aim of this course, to accept the Atonement for ME! My self acceptance can only deepen my love for people and my counselling work.
Although fear is a natural phenomenon, at times it has prevented me from truly believing in myself and being myself because of fear of what others may think of me. This was inherited from my mother when I was growing up in the ’50s and ’60s, and ironically since covid and lockdowns I have been able to re-evaluate and offload large amounts of this fear and become more true to myself and hence happier. It must be said, however, that this journey can be painful and difficult as we are offloading what had become our ‘security blanket’. So be prepared for the struggle of letting go, and do not forget the benefits it will bring.
I would be a more adventurous and prolific artist (painter). I realize that what Keeps me out of venturing deeper in my work in my studio is fear of failure, judgement of others and humiliation from that perceived judgement. I need to turn and face the beast of that possibility. Even if my next work is a tostada failure, it is a step, an action toward a goal of something greater.
Released and free!!
I have held myself hostage to be perfection and have always feared failure rather than embrace success. My standards now are set so high in this midst of pleasing others I have lost myself.
Who would I be? Fun, happy, mischievous, lovable, adventurous and fearless…..
Working towards it ……. with thanks to you.
Orla Dublin
I’d just be truly deeply and freely myself *
Throughout my life, I’ve been conditioned to play it safe, usually because I feared the worst if I didn’t do so. This practical approach has for the most part kept me out of trouble, but it has also left me with numerous regrets. I feel like I’m not really LIVING and experiencing the richness and beauty in life, but simply going through the motions and EXISTING day to day.
It’s so very limiting to feel this sense of internal collapse into self doubt, these question are a gentle opening into a new potential reality, thanks
Calm, focused, spontaneous, present
Without the mental straitjacket of fear, I would trust my body more and not feel so weak, more able to engage in physical activities I enjoy.
It would free up time and money from hamster wheeling between various treatments in a continous attempt to bring down the fear alarm from interoception and obsessive thinking.
I would become more of an anchor for myself, live life more in the present – increasing connection with people, animals and nature.
Collaborative, funny,quirky, silly, grateful, mischievous.
Without fear, I would be more in touch with my true self, trust my intuition more, go for my dreams and not bother about what others think
The worldwould be some much more gentle if we didn’t all believe in the illusion that something was wrong with us.
I would be more rested and not look so tired Recently I’ve gotten into an anxious bedtime state of not being able to go to sleep. Without this fear I’d be so much more alert and at peace throughout the day.
I am already a good and decent human being, but sometimes the fear is being triggered and I drag myself down into rumination.
The thing I find most hard with your steps is to locate the fear in my body. If I don’t find the place(s), how can I nurture and care?
I would be unstoppable. I often pause events in my life based on perceived failures. This is a huge burden to my creativity. It results in loss of confidence and incomplete projects and enhances the “ not good enough” narrative that is holding me from being excellent – and unafraid.
Thank you Tara yet again for your clarity and the emotional resonance of those words “real but not true”…. I’m always grateful for your blessings
Unnecessary entanglements and heart aches.
Thank you for “real but not true,” and “Who would you be if you didn’t believe something was wrong with you?” I know I will use them often!
I actually don’t know who I would be without fear. Fear is so much a part of how I know myself. So I guess I would be stepping into the unknown. Perhaps death of a sort. Perhaps also an exploration of a part of myself I have ignored.
Without being weighed down and constrained by fear I am free to soar on the wings of inspiration and intuition. The nurturing feelings of compassion and kindness flow and spillover into sustained wellbeing and greater capacity to contain, nurture and be available to others. With the growth and expansion of heart space I feel gratitude and blessed to experience change is possible, therein realising my potential and dreams, uplifted and couraged to face and transcend fears when they arise.
Tara my deepest gratitude 🙏for your work, loveliness and the practical help and support you gift 🎁. Unwrapping and exploring the possibilities you invite us to share has been life changing. It’s a baton, like the relay runner I feel empowered and liberated to hand on to enable others to forge their own freedoms. THANK YOU. 😌 Namesta 🙏✨✨
I would be incredible!
Brave, clever, loving, creative and deliciously mercurial. All the things I long to be.
I would be truly confident, willing and able to take risks and to speak my mind and throw out ideas in any situation. I would be free.
I think I would have a wonderful sense of freedom – from the chains I loop around myself. Through my mindfulness practices this is starting to happen in many ways…. and it feels so good. Of course we are all flawed, but learning not to live in judgement of myself is something I want to keep working at, to be able to be more open to what life has to offer, and not hide in fear and anxiety! I am certainly keen to cultivate a fearless heart.
happier and more content with myself
Two little phrases that are so helpful. Real but not true and Who would you be…
Two little phrases that are so helpful. Real but not true and Who would you be…
I would not be “needy”, constantly looking to others for affirmation.
I would be calmer, freer, more relaxed. I would probably have more fun and take more risks. I would enjoy life more. I probably would need less rest and less self soothing. I would be less withdrawn.
I don’t think one can be completely free of fear, it’s an essential part of our being. I would like less of the irrational part that holds me back from social interactions and allow me to take a bolder part in my community.
The first thougt that came to my mind was about my grand doughter. I heared that she was not so happy to go back to school, and wonder what trubling thoughts she might have.
About Who would I be without fear, definitly a dancer, maybe a retiered dancer at my age.
Thank you for sharing your knoledge and spirit.
An excellent short video empowering clients to confront their fear, e.g. of failure, respond with compassion to the part of their physiology in which it resides and utilize the affirmation, ‘it’s real but not true’, and question ‘how would your life be without this problem?’ to break the debilitating trance of fear.
Dealing with anxiety most of my life. So habituated to the physiological response and ruminating thoughts. Desperate to break out of this destructive pattern .
I would be confident. Perhaps a leader and agent for positive change. I would have more conviction when sharing my ideas
Who knows? Feels too late to change that now.
I’m turning 70 and it feels like the most profound transition of my life. Thank you for all you offer to help in this process.
Court
Lack of fear would help me in my quest for a lighter heart. I meditate on love, compassion and gratitude and feel that much of the time. I’m working on letting myself feel more joy and lightheartedness.
I would be able to trust, surrender and receive much more easily. I would be a powerful healer and creative.
So difficult to answer…
First I guess I would less control myself…
Feel free to “be loud “: laugh, cry, sing…
Be free!
Strong, confident, self-reliant. Love the question.