Hello, I’m at work and would like to write more. Unfortunately I’ve suffered from insomnia since I was 16, and I’m now 44 and still suffering. It’s anxiety about sleeping. I’m a Ayurvedic student and a yoga teacher. You would think I’m calm but I’m not inside.
I have had addiction to worry most of my life, from combat in the military. So my life cycles between anxiety and depression. I enjoyed your definition of anxiety versus fear. In combat I saw fear every moment, but it wasn’t until I came back that the anxiety set in that my fear took over that people were trying to kill me were still around. Even though I could intellectually or cognitively tell myself that this was not true, my emotions my senses, smell, taste, hearing all filter through the anxiety. I find that mindfulness and meditation have been a supporting factor for the last 20 years for me.
Thank you Tara. I find worrying about something like giving a talk timing consuming, energy draining, and generally a waste of both. It does help me prepare and practice for it and keeps me in a cycle of self doubt. Looking forward to the next video ?
I know, at sixty years old, that not only has my addiction to worry corrupted my past, but likewise holds me in sterile and unhealthy present environment now, robbing me of a productive and happy future.
I think I’m going to do badly in my assignments and exams and the anxiety stops me from leaning into the studies. I rarely completely enjoy it at the moment as I’m finding it tricky. If the anxiety were to lessen I would have more ability to be fully present. I’m also worried about job interviews.
Thank you Tara. I am waiting for a biopsy of a small mass in three days. There is intensive pain in the area of the mass. Of course my mind has been racing ahead to what this may be. Have been doing deep mindful breathing etc but listening to your directions of mindfully observe thoughts and and again sending caring thoughts and gestures of kindness to myself. So helpful to have your voice encouraging me.
When my fear left, my worry left as well. I had tried everything else, good and bad for me, first. Walking the razors edge, which I think I got the idea from a Pema Chodron cd, absolutely worked for me about 15 years ago. Fear nor anxiety can put their fingers around your throat and harm you. Do it!
It started after a trip to Italy. I got sick while there and developed Social Anxiety. I have always had some form of social anxiety but made worst by this experience. Can’t stop myself from overthinking.
I feel “bad” a lot, judging myself and my anxiety. It is unpleasant for me to just be “with” the feeling of anxiety, but am practicing noticing when it’s there, which is just about all the time. Trying to put some distance between me and the anxiousness. I do not take many risks and it has unfortunately made my life small and not so enjoyable.
I absolutely relate to the mind body looping: at its most basic, I feel anxiety in my body, I worry that it will get worse, the escalation begins. I’ve been doing this all my life. I use these mindfulness practices already, and the absolute help. I am heartened by the idea that step-by-step, moment-by moment, I can begin to weaken that tendency, that I can liberate my energy for the better.
I will use the 3-step method and the distinction between fear and anxiety with my clients. This video is a helpful reminder of how to share these valuable tools. And – to do the same for myself.
This mini course was very inspiring. It is a good reminder of how to use mindfulness to evoke calm in thoughts and feelings. Loved the clear distinction between fear and anxiety. Thank you. Pls add Speech Therapy to your list of professions. I work with Stutterers and this 3 step process could help me help them.
I especially appreciated the clear distinction between fear and anxiety. My therapist has said that I am anxious but I didn’t believe her. I have had experience with anxious people and this manifestation is very palpable. It sometimes causes me to feel anxious for them. Now I have a much better understanding of anxiety. Each of us manifests it differently. I am one who doesn’t fight but, rather, I flee. This video has given me a lot to think about and share with my therapist the next time I see her!
I appreciated the clarity and practical suggestions in this video. Worry has been a family tradition that I’ve honed to a fine art. Except now, at 61, with my own life, work and taking on the financial and care decisions for my aging mother (the queen worry generator in my life) it IS starting indeed to strangle me. I do practice mindfulness and I have a great therapist, but with added responsibilities for someone else, worry can roar into life again. So I appreciate these steps for getting a handle on anxiety, learning to recognize it and bringing myself back to the present safe moment.
Tara Brach nailed it. It’s fear of not being good enough. I do a version of this mindfulness practice when I can. It is surprisingly comforting to put my hand over my heart. The message I give myself is, I’ve been through this before, and I’ve gotten through it.
Music always helped from age of 11 to now (50) and always helped me focus on how to give myself comfort and divert my anxiety to tune into my senses noticing the way it changed how I felt about myself
I suffer from yet undiagnosed social and generalized anxiety that creat most days filled with dread. I practic mindfulness and meditation along with studies of the dharma. All of these are leading me to a greater, more constant seat as the observer rather than the emotion. Thank you so much for such a wonderful series.
Thank you so much! So very awesome. My fear/anxiety related to not reliving the past (going without food/adequate housing, poverty, almost bankruptcy, abuse, toxic marriages (significant impact) – still hearing those voices/and cannot get the visual images of some really significant emotional impacted images out of my head. Triggers send me into what I call “flooded” or “stormed” – literally pushed into fear and cannot think – just overwhelmed.
I use to be so crippled by worry but I have learned to talk myself off the ledge most times. Worry sometimes rob me of a good night of sleep. It invades my dream on occasion. Mindfulness is something I need to practice more.
Thanks again, Tara, I find the phrase “true but not real” a very powerful one. I will try to practice it and to believe it!! As to who would I be if not fearful, well, I am not sure but think I am too much grounded in poor self opinion over many decades that it might be too difficult to unpeel this old onion!
I grew up in a family addicted to worry, worried about money, worry about what the neighbours thought about us, worried about success or rather, lack of success. Probally very like most of us!! I’m very grateful to have received this tool today and I will practice it. It gives me considerable hope that we can all break this pattern and live in presence in this beautiful world.
The associated biochemistry of shame is a mind-altering substance. The dysfunctional delusion connected with it is: I have control over things I have no control over. I learned shame as an ineffective coping mechanism. And the sensations that accompany it cause a level of arousal, which feel like I was/am working on solutions and was/is soothing kind of like nicotine is soothing even though it’s a stimulant. In addition, helping others is addictive like gambling is addictive. Sometimes it “works”. The variable reinforcement schedule is very addictive.
Learning to befriend and connect with the sensations in my body associated with shame allow me to choose other more positive ways of self-soothing which do not give me a terrible hangover.
I worry about getting things done and especially to make sure kids are ok when I’m dashing off to work, single mum, don’t want them adopting my habits of anxiety and worry.
I only realised in my forties that I had experienced General Anxiety Disorder whilst growing up. I now teach in a school with young people with mental health difficulties. I recently delivered a youth course in mindfulness and I incorporate it as much as possible into my lessons. The practice of mindfulness has been my saviour and I live it as much as possible. Great video – thank you!
I find it useful except for the analogy with addiction. I think this is stigmatising and blaming – and not necessarily true . It omits the neurological components of the anxious brain which is wired in certain way. So more attention to the neurobiology would be helpful.
I wake up very early and that’s when my worries start, I’m recover from a serious illness my body is good but my mind is not there yet! Having therapy for trauma
I do not remember a time when I wasn’t worrying or anxious or both. I feel like it’s been like this most of my waking life. I have tried meditation, mindfulness, yet I found myself back to that anxiety blackhole.
Sophia Hausler says
I worry I will burn in hell and be miserable all my life as I am my own worst enemy.
Michelle Yake says
Hello, I’m at work and would like to write more. Unfortunately I’ve suffered from insomnia since I was 16, and I’m now 44 and still suffering. It’s anxiety about sleeping. I’m a Ayurvedic student and a yoga teacher. You would think I’m calm but I’m not inside.
Thank you so much
Michelle
Bron Lancaster says
It’s like a knawing toothache that gets worse the more you focus on it.
Denis Darby says
I have had addiction to worry most of my life, from combat in the military. So my life cycles between anxiety and depression. I enjoyed your definition of anxiety versus fear. In combat I saw fear every moment, but it wasn’t until I came back that the anxiety set in that my fear took over that people were trying to kill me were still around. Even though I could intellectually or cognitively tell myself that this was not true, my emotions my senses, smell, taste, hearing all filter through the anxiety. I find that mindfulness and meditation have been a supporting factor for the last 20 years for me.
Peter T says
Thank you Tara. I find worrying about something like giving a talk timing consuming, energy draining, and generally a waste of both. It does help me prepare and practice for it and keeps me in a cycle of self doubt. Looking forward to the next video ?
Dianne Picard says
Just get into non stop cycle of worry to ppint of almost non functioninh
G Lanz says
I know, at sixty years old, that not only has my addiction to worry corrupted my past, but likewise holds me in sterile and unhealthy present environment now, robbing me of a productive and happy future.
Li Mi says
Thank you! Big fan of your work. This does help!
Ravi Chari says
I am known as the worrier in my family. I anticipate problems.
Moira Lynch says
Thanks, Tara! I am a huge fan of your work!
Via Anderson says
I think and worry too much.
Robin Fos says
My addiction to worry is on a ten plus level. I continue to work on them. However my flaw is sitting still long enough to relax.
Lucy Mackey says
I think I’m going to do badly in my assignments and exams and the anxiety stops me from leaning into the studies. I rarely completely enjoy it at the moment as I’m finding it tricky. If the anxiety were to lessen I would have more ability to be fully present. I’m also worried about job interviews.
Carol Bigio says
Thank you Tara. I am waiting for a biopsy of a small mass in three days. There is intensive pain in the area of the mass. Of course my mind has been racing ahead to what this may be. Have been doing deep mindful breathing etc but listening to your directions of mindfully observe thoughts and and again sending caring thoughts and gestures of kindness to myself. So helpful to have your voice encouraging me.
Karen Cooper says
When my fear left, my worry left as well. I had tried everything else, good and bad for me, first. Walking the razors edge, which I think I got the idea from a Pema Chodron cd, absolutely worked for me about 15 years ago. Fear nor anxiety can put their fingers around your throat and harm you. Do it!
Cuthbert Mitchell says
It started after a trip to Italy. I got sick while there and developed Social Anxiety. I have always had some form of social anxiety but made worst by this experience. Can’t stop myself from overthinking.
Nancy h says
I feel “bad” a lot, judging myself and my anxiety. It is unpleasant for me to just be “with” the feeling of anxiety, but am practicing noticing when it’s there, which is just about all the time. Trying to put some distance between me and the anxiousness. I do not take many risks and it has unfortunately made my life small and not so enjoyable.
Lisa James says
I absolutely relate to the mind body looping: at its most basic, I feel anxiety in my body, I worry that it will get worse, the escalation begins. I’ve been doing this all my life. I use these mindfulness practices already, and the absolute help. I am heartened by the idea that step-by-step, moment-by moment, I can begin to weaken that tendency, that I can liberate my energy for the better.
Helen Jean says
I will use the 3-step method and the distinction between fear and anxiety with my clients. This video is a helpful reminder of how to share these valuable tools. And – to do the same for myself.
Regina says
This mini course was very inspiring. It is a good reminder of how to use mindfulness to evoke calm in thoughts and feelings. Loved the clear distinction between fear and anxiety. Thank you. Pls add Speech Therapy to your list of professions. I work with Stutterers and this 3 step process could help me help them.
Cathy Jackson says
I especially appreciated the clear distinction between fear and anxiety. My therapist has said that I am anxious but I didn’t believe her. I have had experience with anxious people and this manifestation is very palpable. It sometimes causes me to feel anxious for them. Now I have a much better understanding of anxiety. Each of us manifests it differently. I am one who doesn’t fight but, rather, I flee. This video has given me a lot to think about and share with my therapist the next time I see her!
Carol Lee Hawtin says
Fantastic. I have a client who just might respond to this. So far, I havent created any major inroads to her chronic worry. Than you from me and her!
Lesley Goddin says
I appreciated the clarity and practical suggestions in this video. Worry has been a family tradition that I’ve honed to a fine art. Except now, at 61, with my own life, work and taking on the financial and care decisions for my aging mother (the queen worry generator in my life) it IS starting indeed to strangle me. I do practice mindfulness and I have a great therapist, but with added responsibilities for someone else, worry can roar into life again. So I appreciate these steps for getting a handle on anxiety, learning to recognize it and bringing myself back to the present safe moment.
Husna Aliyu says
I am a widow of 13 years with two kids and could not go in to another relationship since then I even ended with hypertension
Valerie Fitzgeral says
Tara Brach nailed it. It’s fear of not being good enough. I do a version of this mindfulness practice when I can. It is surprisingly comforting to put my hand over my heart. The message I give myself is, I’ve been through this before, and I’ve gotten through it.
Cyndi Starzyk-Frey says
Excellent practice! Great way to explain and explore worry/anxiety with clients and self. I will use this often. Thank you!
Deborah Dines says
Music always helped from age of 11 to now (50) and always helped me focus on how to give myself comfort and divert my anxiety to tune into my senses noticing the way it changed how I felt about myself
Ryan Box says
I suffer from yet undiagnosed social and generalized anxiety that creat most days filled with dread. I practic mindfulness and meditation along with studies of the dharma. All of these are leading me to a greater, more constant seat as the observer rather than the emotion. Thank you so much for such a wonderful series.
Kelly Trebilcock says
Thank you so much! So very awesome. My fear/anxiety related to not reliving the past (going without food/adequate housing, poverty, almost bankruptcy, abuse, toxic marriages (significant impact) – still hearing those voices/and cannot get the visual images of some really significant emotional impacted images out of my head. Triggers send me into what I call “flooded” or “stormed” – literally pushed into fear and cannot think – just overwhelmed.
Coralee Gall says
I have suffered with GAD and health anxiety since I was a toddler and have been stuck trying to clear it so I can move on with more freedom
Eileen Donahoe says
Eileen
Andrea A says
Thankyou! I will use the three steps in my class of 9-year olds, where some have worrying issues.
Jennifer B says
I use to be so crippled by worry but I have learned to talk myself off the ledge most times. Worry sometimes rob me of a good night of sleep. It invades my dream on occasion. Mindfulness is something I need to practice more.
Shane OC says
Great Mark Twain quote
Grainne McLaughlin says
Thanks again, Tara, I find the phrase “true but not real” a very powerful one. I will try to practice it and to believe it!! As to who would I be if not fearful, well, I am not sure but think I am too much grounded in poor self opinion over many decades that it might be too difficult to unpeel this old onion!
Nigel Keatley says
I grew up in a family addicted to worry, worried about money, worry about what the neighbours thought about us, worried about success or rather, lack of success. Probally very like most of us!! I’m very grateful to have received this tool today and I will practice it. It gives me considerable hope that we can all break this pattern and live in presence in this beautiful world.
Mary Robertson says
The associated biochemistry of shame is a mind-altering substance. The dysfunctional delusion connected with it is: I have control over things I have no control over. I learned shame as an ineffective coping mechanism. And the sensations that accompany it cause a level of arousal, which feel like I was/am working on solutions and was/is soothing kind of like nicotine is soothing even though it’s a stimulant. In addition, helping others is addictive like gambling is addictive. Sometimes it “works”. The variable reinforcement schedule is very addictive.
Learning to befriend and connect with the sensations in my body associated with shame allow me to choose other more positive ways of self-soothing which do not give me a terrible hangover.
Bernie Conway says
This video was helpful i like that it was short with great clarity… the 3 step plan is useful.
Thanks
Penny Errill says
I liked the simple straight forward approach, the 3 step technique is very effective, I Like to use with carers. Useful for health anxieties
tina fahmy says
a sudden panic that makes me jump in to stop it, or worse creeping panic that slowly turns to dread
Phil SDSZ says
I worry I’ll never achieve my goals & dreams.
Joan Mitton says
I worry about getting things done and especially to make sure kids are ok when I’m dashing off to work, single mum, don’t want them adopting my habits of anxiety and worry.
Margaret Kee says
I worry and become anxious about all sorts of things and, as hard as I try, can’t push the thoughts from my mind.
Ann Starkie says
Really helpful video. Explains the steps to manage worry and general anxiety really well. Have shared. Made me feel calm!
Ann Starkie says
Really helpful video. Explains the steps to manage worry and general anxiety really well. Have shared. Made me feel calm!
Matilda Tassah says
Thanks Dr. Brach, for making this clear distinction between Fear & Anxiety. I will definitely use the 3 skills with myself and my clients!
Annette Wickenden says
I only realised in my forties that I had experienced General Anxiety Disorder whilst growing up. I now teach in a school with young people with mental health difficulties. I recently delivered a youth course in mindfulness and I incorporate it as much as possible into my lessons. The practice of mindfulness has been my saviour and I live it as much as possible. Great video – thank you!
Sue Richardson says
I find it useful except for the analogy with addiction. I think this is stigmatising and blaming – and not necessarily true . It omits the neurological components of the anxious brain which is wired in certain way. So more attention to the neurobiology would be helpful.
Julie Ireland says
I wake up very early and that’s when my worries start, I’m recover from a serious illness my body is good but my mind is not there yet! Having therapy for trauma
Anna S says
I do not remember a time when I wasn’t worrying or anxious or both. I feel like it’s been like this most of my waking life. I have tried meditation, mindfulness, yet I found myself back to that anxiety blackhole.