Im pretty sure this is an inherited trait and it seems to have worsened with age and inevitable uncertainty. I do what I can to keep it at bay (meditation, acupuncture, exercise) but often I feel I can’t comtrol the looping thoughts of fear.
As someone who grew up being persecuted because of my family’s religion, abused, sexually assaulted by classmates & there was no one to turn to for help. I realized I was alone in the world with strikes against me, due to no fault of my own. I was also a gifted child who was told I was brilliant, but family members made sure I couldn’t thrive, so I turned to self-distructive habits of behavior in order to assert a measure of control over my life.
I wasted my life destroying it because it hurt too much to have immediate family members I loved destroy it for me. Now that they are all dead, at 65 I am beginning to live again because I am free from being someone else’s sacrifice ~ including my own. I’m writing a book about surviving someone else’s madness because of belief indoctrination, but I still worry about having an unknown spectre pull the rug out from under me.
I THOUGHT OF MYSELF AS A HEAVENLY ANGEL
I FELL FROM THE GREAT HEIGHT
EVER SINCE I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO GET BACK
“GET BACK_ GET BACK_ GET BACK TO WHERE YOU ONCE BELONG…”
THEN AGAIN I AM NOT AN ANGEL_ I AM HUMAN
“TO ERR IS HUMAN TO FORGIVE DIVINE.” I CAN LIVE WITH THIS.
For myself, who has been dealing with with a chronic deteriorating neurological condition since the age of six and which has reduced my life chances and experiences in so many ways, worry and rumination are pitfalls into which i can sink. Having some explanations and practices to ease my anxiety is so valuable. Thank you, Tara.❤️
Excellent, as usual.
Pity about the ‘video gimmicks’… the stuff that for no earthly reason, appears… jumps around… changes size/shape… and oh, lets not forget the ‘uber-coool’ (duh!) -whooshing- noises…
This is brilliant and so helpful. Everytime I listen to Tara I feel somewhat healed. Being a single mum is sometimes challenging and it is easy to project and worry over the future for our children, but it becomes unhelpful and has you being exactly the sort of person that they then want to push away from….Thank you.
I have social fears caused by mobbing and betrayal that I could not really stand. I feel how this influences my future planning. I escape these thoughts but in defined situations it returns and I start new to overcome. I know that this way is the only way out. Im grateful to have some guidance here to remember and strengthen me ?
I do experience all those nagging worrying thoughts.I try to connect with my breaths but sometime you worry so much it makes you physically sick and I experience pain in my neck area as well as my tummy.Thank you for the useful tips.
My wife and grandson are both seriously addicted to worry. To the point of terror at times.
I have suffered from PTSD but through excellent counseling and much guided introspection have pretty much dealt with my own issues.
Whenever people tell me to stop worrying so much or make me feel more anxious by not understanding what my anxiety looks like I become extremely angry and become more anxious. It’s something I have to explain to people but usually it’s too late and I’ve become even more agitated..
I have chronic anxiety, panic disorder and suffer from intense ongoing bodily symptoms. I also have PTSD and I have had this since I was 12. I have spent time in the hospital trying to get well, I have had two suicide attempts and I am constantly dreading the next thing that could happen. I feel increasingly desperate to get a hold of this because it’s ruining my life.
Everything Tara is amazing. Seamless interweaving of information with quotes or stories, all simple to understand and employ. Of course, the magic is then in the practice. Thank you for all you offer. Namaste.
I’ve long been aware that unnecessary worry and anxiety eat up huge amounts of my energy and keep me from taking certain (joyful) risks. Thank you for this wise and gentle process. I look forward to using it — daily!
I’ve always had a fear of what people think about me… I was raped by my father at the age of 9 until I was about 12… My mother abandoned me when I was about 14 maybe older I don’t remember
In some cases addiction to worry or fear can be actually viewed as idolatry. It is a choice. Now why would I want to make this misery an idol?
It only happened for me when I tapered off of SSRI medication. It came on gradually. I was re-adjusting to a new home in a completely new environment and culture. I just didn’t know what to do with myself half the time in this new place. Then I became fearful. My sleep patterns changed. My eating patterns changed. I lost 25 pounds without trying. I tried supplementation but I didn’t realize it could be dangerous. I was trying to replace the SSRIs by using five – HTP. I hadn’t realize the dangers of staying on it too long. Later I realized it was only supposed to be temporarily used and taking breaks every few weeks. But no I foolishly stayed on it for about 4 1/2 months without a break and then was advised to get off of it quickly. Cold turkey not always a good idea but I was getting more sick on it. So here I am presently with a new Doctor Who says it’s out of her scope of practice to evaluate diagnose and treat me. Wait. She is a nurse practitioner. She basically made me feel like I was a freak as she said she didn’t have any other patients like me. She basically scolded me for being unable to take a couple of different medications that she prescribed… they just didn’t work correctly and had too many side effects. She gave up on me but then decided to finally consult with someone associated with her practice who is a psychiatrist. They couldn’t squeeze me in but they went over all the notes and gave me something temporarily until I could find my own psychiatrist. My entire state has waiting lists of people because there is a shortage of mental health practitioners here. I’m thinking it is the state of the world in which we are living in which is driving people to these mental health practitioners. I do practice my spiritual walk and pray, meditate on the word of God. Have supportive friends but I don’t see them enough. I have a wonderful husband and a man of God for sure. So I’m on this temporary medicine which mainly holds me all together but I am not convinced it is the right medicine for the rest of my life. Meanwhile I never ever want to go through tapering off of an rx I probably should be on. I did not ask for it this condition. I did not create it. And I did not control it. Though I tried to. What had happened inside the limbic part of my brain when I was a baby up to whatever age I left my parents house was not my fault. Had I known then what I know now I would have reached out for help. I would’ve left that house much earlier than I had. Our environment is everything or at least it is for me. Though I had healthy habits all my life, a relationship with Christ mainly over the last 30 years more strongly than ever. I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to not neglect the basics: A balanced life with enough exercise, Whole Food nutrition, time out for yourself with plenty of rest and relaxation, focus on the Lord God in Jesus name, reading in the word and spending time with people that you trust versus isolation. The brain needs rest but it also needs healthy people stimulation. Whenever I get that haunting sensation to worry, to Frette, to complain, to fear,,, I praise God audibly, I asked my husband for a hug, I do something nice for myself, I pray, I put soothing music on or I listen to a very good speaker sermon. But I’m not giving into those negative feelings that some of us are plagued with it’s not a mental illness it is being open aware and frim being victimized in the past so this part of our brain has been affected it is the amygdala part of the limbic system and where we can nourish this is through the word of God, prayer, and being surrounded by the right people. Where I put my focus there I will be.
There is a book by Dr. Caroline Leif i plan on purchasing “Restart your brain”…i also plan on never being ashamed of myself for being me. “ I am no longer a slave to fear – I am a child of God. “ check out that song on YouTube it is beautiful it makes people cry – in a good way. Sing it over and over and believe it let it soothe your soul.
Dear Tara one more time I like to thank you for the simplicity with wich you share your knowledge and deep human kindness.
The strategy for breaking a fear loop will have deep impact in many people that suffer hopelessly without understanding why..?
Deep regards ?
J. J.
I’m afraid all the time. It’s debilitating. Lots of the situations I fear have already happened and I’m terrified they will happen again. I’m afraid of any type of confrontation. I’m afraid of someone close to me dying, I’m afraid the phone will ring and it will be bad or scary news. My psych continues to throw meds at me, and I need to find a different therapist. I’m paralyzed by fear.
You are so right. I am addicted to angst, to anxiety, to self doubt.
I seldom allow myself joy. I know I am blessed in so many ways yet I can’t seem to stop the anxiety. I now am doing a B’nei Mitzvah. I am 77 and the other 10 people are younger. I find it impossible to learn the Hebrew enough to read from the Torah. My voice doesn’t cooperate with chanting. The Cantor has assured me that it is totally okay to read instead of chant and to use the transliteration. But, I’m afraid I’m being seen as inept. I’m afraid of humiliating myself in front of a room full of people. I’m afraid of being seen as an ‘age’. This is just one example. I am anxious about finances, about not having done anything purposeful in life, about almost everything. I’m filled with self doubt. Thank you so much for these steps and compassion.
Yes, you definetly call it addiction…or at least a worry habit. Also it could show up as a worry avoidance – as powerful as catastrophising everything… Avoiding addiction. You could label it a lie, a peaceful lie…a pathological need to stay safe…to fall asleep and never wake up. To stay in the middle, comfortable, being like everyone else, not to be noticed… worry addiction. Is this is why middle class growing so expansively?
I was raised with a mother who would constantly worry. Her anxious state was reflected in me. As an adult I am always learning how to heal my anxious mind through mind body work, mindfulnesses practices, healthy living and therapy like cbt. I became a yoga teacher, a group facilitator, and a meditation instructor. I enjoy sharing my knowledge with commumity and clients. I am always learning and evolving.
Until I started practising regular meditation along with reading books by Jack Kornfield, Thich Nhat Hanh Jon Kabat-Zinn, and of course Tara, to mention just a few, I began to recognise the worrying and relentless negative thoughts and the resulting bodily effects. It has been a body and mind revolution for which I’m so grateful. The insight has been a gift, to coin a phrase ‘just keeps giving’ ….to the quality of my own existence.
Thank you, for sharing this amazing self-care process, when clients are able to experience and notice there on transformation Is very rewarding work.
Thank you
What I find the most interesting is how unaware most people still are of the fact that worrying does not change anything except our physical and emotional well being. When I help my clients try to see the logic in this, they really want to still hang on to the worry. They truly believe that if they don’t worry, something worse will happen. It’s both fascinating and frustrating!
I am a single mother and my family depend upon me being able to work full-time. Years ago I had a health crash and I couldn’t work for months. I have recovered from that period but now whenever I get a cold or flu I get into a fear loop about not being able to continue working. Thanks for this lovely self-care process which I have already used to shift my fear just now. I can feel my energy levels returning to normal already.
I love the simple 3-step process. I see this not only with clients, but with so many perople in my life. I like calling worry addictive…it truly has that potential. I often say anxiety is seductive.
I’ve seen it take over – so crippling / strangling. And I’ve observed that most of my clients in a psychiatric hospital have anxiety, which makes sense if psychosis can be thought of as overwhelm rather than as a genetic disorder, or as a bolt out of the blue.
Very nice 3 step summary of easing out of the addiction of worry.
what pleases me is the clarity in your teaching and the art of giving confidence in the possibility of transforming, thank you!
Again: a very practical way of using your three stage process to notice:
mindfulness of thoughts; and
our physical experiences accompanying them; followed by:
offering self some comfort and care.
Sounds very much like the body scan treatment followed by affirmation work. Is this so, or am I missing something?
I will find opportunities to use one or both approaches and see how they can break the cycle of worry.
I worry about my chronic migraines and health
I’m not addicted to worry I’m actually a teacher with students that are very concerned over their exams and are anxious
Im pretty sure this is an inherited trait and it seems to have worsened with age and inevitable uncertainty. I do what I can to keep it at bay (meditation, acupuncture, exercise) but often I feel I can’t comtrol the looping thoughts of fear.
I am not addicted to worry. Actually I am an alcohol and drug counselor. I assumed that this was a PDF concerning the topic.
As someone who grew up being persecuted because of my family’s religion, abused, sexually assaulted by classmates & there was no one to turn to for help. I realized I was alone in the world with strikes against me, due to no fault of my own. I was also a gifted child who was told I was brilliant, but family members made sure I couldn’t thrive, so I turned to self-distructive habits of behavior in order to assert a measure of control over my life.
I wasted my life destroying it because it hurt too much to have immediate family members I loved destroy it for me. Now that they are all dead, at 65 I am beginning to live again because I am free from being someone else’s sacrifice ~ including my own. I’m writing a book about surviving someone else’s madness because of belief indoctrination, but I still worry about having an unknown spectre pull the rug out from under me.
Every time I return to my breath when I’m anxious I know for sure that this will pass anyway sooner or later . Thank you so much ? mexico ??
I THOUGHT OF MYSELF AS A HEAVENLY ANGEL
I FELL FROM THE GREAT HEIGHT
EVER SINCE I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO GET BACK
“GET BACK_ GET BACK_ GET BACK TO WHERE YOU ONCE BELONG…”
THEN AGAIN I AM NOT AN ANGEL_ I AM HUMAN
“TO ERR IS HUMAN TO FORGIVE DIVINE.” I CAN LIVE WITH THIS.
For myself, who has been dealing with with a chronic deteriorating neurological condition since the age of six and which has reduced my life chances and experiences in so many ways, worry and rumination are pitfalls into which i can sink. Having some explanations and practices to ease my anxiety is so valuable. Thank you, Tara.❤️
Excellent, as usual.
Pity about the ‘video gimmicks’… the stuff that for no earthly reason, appears… jumps around… changes size/shape… and oh, lets not forget the ‘uber-coool’ (duh!) -whooshing- noises…
A lovely interweaving of facts and stories. My client’s will appreciate these insights put so elegantly and simply.
I am seeing a lady who says that breathing exercises and mindfulness make her hyperventilate. This technique is not possible at the moment with her
This is brilliant and so helpful. Everytime I listen to Tara I feel somewhat healed. Being a single mum is sometimes challenging and it is easy to project and worry over the future for our children, but it becomes unhelpful and has you being exactly the sort of person that they then want to push away from….Thank you.
I have social fears caused by mobbing and betrayal that I could not really stand. I feel how this influences my future planning. I escape these thoughts but in defined situations it returns and I start new to overcome. I know that this way is the only way out. Im grateful to have some guidance here to remember and strengthen me ?
I do experience all those nagging worrying thoughts.I try to connect with my breaths but sometime you worry so much it makes you physically sick and I experience pain in my neck area as well as my tummy.Thank you for the useful tips.
When I cannot sleep and constantly in worry mode
I never thought of it as an addiction. More like an anticipation that something bad was about to happen.
As a Black woman I am worn by the constant worries of trying to navigate white spaces.
My wife and grandson are both seriously addicted to worry. To the point of terror at times.
I have suffered from PTSD but through excellent counseling and much guided introspection have pretty much dealt with my own issues.
Whenever people tell me to stop worrying so much or make me feel more anxious by not understanding what my anxiety looks like I become extremely angry and become more anxious. It’s something I have to explain to people but usually it’s too late and I’ve become even more agitated..
I have chronic anxiety, panic disorder and suffer from intense ongoing bodily symptoms. I also have PTSD and I have had this since I was 12. I have spent time in the hospital trying to get well, I have had two suicide attempts and I am constantly dreading the next thing that could happen. I feel increasingly desperate to get a hold of this because it’s ruining my life.
Everything Tara is amazing. Seamless interweaving of information with quotes or stories, all simple to understand and employ. Of course, the magic is then in the practice. Thank you for all you offer. Namaste.
After brain surgery I worry about bringing different from before. Energy in self not the same. Good and bad days.
I’ve long been aware that unnecessary worry and anxiety eat up huge amounts of my energy and keep me from taking certain (joyful) risks. Thank you for this wise and gentle process. I look forward to using it — daily!
I’ve always had a fear of what people think about me… I was raped by my father at the age of 9 until I was about 12… My mother abandoned me when I was about 14 maybe older I don’t remember
In some cases addiction to worry or fear can be actually viewed as idolatry. It is a choice. Now why would I want to make this misery an idol?
It only happened for me when I tapered off of SSRI medication. It came on gradually. I was re-adjusting to a new home in a completely new environment and culture. I just didn’t know what to do with myself half the time in this new place. Then I became fearful. My sleep patterns changed. My eating patterns changed. I lost 25 pounds without trying. I tried supplementation but I didn’t realize it could be dangerous. I was trying to replace the SSRIs by using five – HTP. I hadn’t realize the dangers of staying on it too long. Later I realized it was only supposed to be temporarily used and taking breaks every few weeks. But no I foolishly stayed on it for about 4 1/2 months without a break and then was advised to get off of it quickly. Cold turkey not always a good idea but I was getting more sick on it. So here I am presently with a new Doctor Who says it’s out of her scope of practice to evaluate diagnose and treat me. Wait. She is a nurse practitioner. She basically made me feel like I was a freak as she said she didn’t have any other patients like me. She basically scolded me for being unable to take a couple of different medications that she prescribed… they just didn’t work correctly and had too many side effects. She gave up on me but then decided to finally consult with someone associated with her practice who is a psychiatrist. They couldn’t squeeze me in but they went over all the notes and gave me something temporarily until I could find my own psychiatrist. My entire state has waiting lists of people because there is a shortage of mental health practitioners here. I’m thinking it is the state of the world in which we are living in which is driving people to these mental health practitioners. I do practice my spiritual walk and pray, meditate on the word of God. Have supportive friends but I don’t see them enough. I have a wonderful husband and a man of God for sure. So I’m on this temporary medicine which mainly holds me all together but I am not convinced it is the right medicine for the rest of my life. Meanwhile I never ever want to go through tapering off of an rx I probably should be on. I did not ask for it this condition. I did not create it. And I did not control it. Though I tried to. What had happened inside the limbic part of my brain when I was a baby up to whatever age I left my parents house was not my fault. Had I known then what I know now I would have reached out for help. I would’ve left that house much earlier than I had. Our environment is everything or at least it is for me. Though I had healthy habits all my life, a relationship with Christ mainly over the last 30 years more strongly than ever. I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to not neglect the basics: A balanced life with enough exercise, Whole Food nutrition, time out for yourself with plenty of rest and relaxation, focus on the Lord God in Jesus name, reading in the word and spending time with people that you trust versus isolation. The brain needs rest but it also needs healthy people stimulation. Whenever I get that haunting sensation to worry, to Frette, to complain, to fear,,, I praise God audibly, I asked my husband for a hug, I do something nice for myself, I pray, I put soothing music on or I listen to a very good speaker sermon. But I’m not giving into those negative feelings that some of us are plagued with it’s not a mental illness it is being open aware and frim being victimized in the past so this part of our brain has been affected it is the amygdala part of the limbic system and where we can nourish this is through the word of God, prayer, and being surrounded by the right people. Where I put my focus there I will be.
There is a book by Dr. Caroline Leif i plan on purchasing “Restart your brain”…i also plan on never being ashamed of myself for being me. “ I am no longer a slave to fear – I am a child of God. “ check out that song on YouTube it is beautiful it makes people cry – in a good way. Sing it over and over and believe it let it soothe your soul.
Worry and feeling overwhelmed can paralyze me into inaction. That of course only makes the situation worse.
Dear Tara one more time I like to thank you for the simplicity with wich you share your knowledge and deep human kindness.
The strategy for breaking a fear loop will have deep impact in many people that suffer hopelessly without understanding why..?
Deep regards ?
J. J.
I’m afraid all the time. It’s debilitating. Lots of the situations I fear have already happened and I’m terrified they will happen again. I’m afraid of any type of confrontation. I’m afraid of someone close to me dying, I’m afraid the phone will ring and it will be bad or scary news. My psych continues to throw meds at me, and I need to find a different therapist. I’m paralyzed by fear.
You are so right. I am addicted to angst, to anxiety, to self doubt.
I seldom allow myself joy. I know I am blessed in so many ways yet I can’t seem to stop the anxiety. I now am doing a B’nei Mitzvah. I am 77 and the other 10 people are younger. I find it impossible to learn the Hebrew enough to read from the Torah. My voice doesn’t cooperate with chanting. The Cantor has assured me that it is totally okay to read instead of chant and to use the transliteration. But, I’m afraid I’m being seen as inept. I’m afraid of humiliating myself in front of a room full of people. I’m afraid of being seen as an ‘age’. This is just one example. I am anxious about finances, about not having done anything purposeful in life, about almost everything. I’m filled with self doubt. Thank you so much for these steps and compassion.
Yes, you definetly call it addiction…or at least a worry habit. Also it could show up as a worry avoidance – as powerful as catastrophising everything… Avoiding addiction. You could label it a lie, a peaceful lie…a pathological need to stay safe…to fall asleep and never wake up. To stay in the middle, comfortable, being like everyone else, not to be noticed… worry addiction. Is this is why middle class growing so expansively?
Yes my anxious thoughts come when something is due been trying my breathing technique but still spend my mind
I know how much energy is trapped in the worry.
Thanks so much for your help hopefully I shall be able save your video to watch again
I was raised with a mother who would constantly worry. Her anxious state was reflected in me. As an adult I am always learning how to heal my anxious mind through mind body work, mindfulnesses practices, healthy living and therapy like cbt. I became a yoga teacher, a group facilitator, and a meditation instructor. I enjoy sharing my knowledge with commumity and clients. I am always learning and evolving.
Very good information. Thank you
Until I started practising regular meditation along with reading books by Jack Kornfield, Thich Nhat Hanh Jon Kabat-Zinn, and of course Tara, to mention just a few, I began to recognise the worrying and relentless negative thoughts and the resulting bodily effects. It has been a body and mind revolution for which I’m so grateful. The insight has been a gift, to coin a phrase ‘just keeps giving’ ….to the quality of my own existence.
Thank you, for sharing this amazing self-care process, when clients are able to experience and notice there on transformation Is very rewarding work.
Thank you
What I find the most interesting is how unaware most people still are of the fact that worrying does not change anything except our physical and emotional well being. When I help my clients try to see the logic in this, they really want to still hang on to the worry. They truly believe that if they don’t worry, something worse will happen. It’s both fascinating and frustrating!
I practiced the three steps and felt better right away. Thanks you!!
I have seen and experienced this sometimes not recognising the like between worry and addiction
I am a single mother and my family depend upon me being able to work full-time. Years ago I had a health crash and I couldn’t work for months. I have recovered from that period but now whenever I get a cold or flu I get into a fear loop about not being able to continue working. Thanks for this lovely self-care process which I have already used to shift my fear just now. I can feel my energy levels returning to normal already.
I have seen and experienced this most my life.
Social Phobic Disorder
A very wonderful n clear explanation
I love the simple 3-step process. I see this not only with clients, but with so many perople in my life. I like calling worry addictive…it truly has that potential. I often say anxiety is seductive.
THANK YOU, TARA, THESE VIDEOS ARE SO HELPFUL!
ELIZABETH
I’ve seen it take over – so crippling / strangling. And I’ve observed that most of my clients in a psychiatric hospital have anxiety, which makes sense if psychosis can be thought of as overwhelm rather than as a genetic disorder, or as a bolt out of the blue.
Very nice 3 step summary of easing out of the addiction of worry.
This is a wonderful explanation and exercise in mindfulness to calm the worrying mind. Thank you 🙂