I spent years living a relatively fearless life. A few years ago, I experienced a series of traumatic events that devastated much of the life I had worked so hard to achieved. Now – with difficulty – I prepare carefully. I have a ritual around doing things that make me afraid. I always have a Plan B. Working this way hasn’t solved my fear, but it helps when I have a detailed plan for my activities – and a Plan B for contingencies. And if I’m stuck in a scary situation I can’t control, I do breathing exercises.
Thanks Tara,
I’m still trying to figure out how to face my terrible fear of reducing my anxiety meds that help me sleep. I have a huge fear of not sleeping. I’ve been dealing with this for a year and a half now. I’m really scared and have a very hard time feeling centered and calm. I go to my therapist once a week and am trying to practice meditation and positive affirmations, but I still have this huge huge fear, so don’t know how to face it yet.
I’ve walked through many fears during my lifetime so far, but this one has taken the cake. Still searching and trying every day to walk through this but just can’t seem to. I’m 62 and have GAD, just so you know.
Talking about the situation or problem helps me to face fear.
Mindfulness also helps me. I’m learning this skill now and I feel a better person because of it.
One of the mindful things I do is to unwind properly before sleeping. This entails a routine good for me, checking out of electronic stuff (fb, etc), relaxing by taking a few deep breaths, putting my tv onto sleep mode (background noise) and turning the volume down so I can just hear it, close my eyes during the ads and often in 5 minutes I am asleep.
This routine works for me so that I dont start thinking of the 1M+ things that I could and shouldn’t think of at bed time.
It’s also helping me to be more relaxed during the day. The PTSD I have has a way to go but not as far as yesterday. I like to remind myself of this.
NOOM has also helped me to lose weight, I’m not advertising just saying that it is helping me in my journey to mindful thinking for myself.
To breath, to observe my heart rate and respiration, how not inmediately reacting helps me to calm down myself and be able to think about what’s going on. That every thing is impermanente, so there is no reason to react so strongly. I do not want to suffer nor be causing any, so Maitri, Love is the best to calm down. Regular meditation helps me a lot to get focus in what really matters when anxiety arrives.
I can only relate how I handle fear sometimes by mentally going “outside of myself. Almost like I’m watching myself from a distance, then completing the action that has instilled fear in me. Speaking in a meeting, or in front of a group of people.
I’m a 75 year old worrier. I can see how my anxiety has contributed to my high blood pressure.Meditation helps but I will now begin the 3 Step Process – especially with hand on heart. The very idea gives me comfort. Now I’ll be an anti worry warrior!
I face fear when I look inside myself, during meditation or whole-body breathing.
But in these last months fear of the future (I’m 65), concerning my reality begins to trouble me as it has never been before. I think I can release the fear, but I’m not sleeping well and I’m having some trouble with my usual diet. Thanks for sharing.
What helps me face fear are the structure of a daily routine, the warmth and amusement of my animals( one dog, two cats), a laugh with a friend, a great book, or going outside under the sky and the trees to fill my bird feeders.
susan north
What helps me is that the fear I feel is due to a creation of my mind and that I can stop it by looking into it and recognise that it’s not real. Even though I might feel that fear in my body, I can control it and make it subside
When I was 18-19 years old, I had a good friend say to me, “Why do you always apologize for everything, even things not your fault.” I immediately responded, “Oh! I am so sorry!” The, we both laughed and talked about something else.
His words stuck with me, though. I thought long and hard about them and realized my insuriety had become a big, warm, and comfy blanket I wrapped myself in whenever afraid of being rejected or unloved. I realized that it was no longer serving me in attaining my dreams,. In fact, it was now smothering me. I decided to visualize this blanket wrapped tightly around me while a raging bonfire appearedof fear appeared before me. I threw off the blanket and walked through the fire, freedfrom the insecurity and fear.
Today, some 42 years later, when fear appears, I turn from my flight, fight, or freeze and face it, recognize it, and let it fall away. I like better your idea of locating it in the body, breathing into it, asking what it wants, and releasing it. I suspect and hope that this method will aid me in more quickly recognizing when fear has re-appeared by tightness in my body scan. Thank you ❣️
A lot of my clients face fears with the support of their spiritual practices. With my assistance they also practice the skill of mindfulness awareness to investigate the underlying thought that fuels the fear. Thank you for sharing your wisdom, Tara.
Thanks to Rick Hanson and his Foundations of Wellbeing course, of which you are a part, getting in touch with basic Safety, Satisfaction and Connection, here and now, experienced bodily and emotionally, helps me face fear.
Thank you for all you do,
Bev
Being fully present with them and whatever they are experiencing. Also helping them become aware of their primary emotions that have been suppressed, via various methods like Reiki and mindfulness.
Thank you. I have been practicing mindfulness for quite a awhile. A physical condition that causes pain brought up fear. Today I was able to welcome the fear some and gave it a little hug so to speak. I realized it needed to be felt.
Also what I am learning from books by Shinzen Young on pain and mindfulness have helped.
Body scanning allows me the time and space to recognise when fear wants to take control. And feeling that tension in my body is the first step to befriending fear!
thank you, as many americans: talk to much, do not come to the point, console them with the basics, never tell them something important and sell it not before the next video, text, chapter … lol
Thinking of my dearly loved and departed grandmother when I feel anxious because I know that no matter what is going on, she was and is my greatest fan and hold unconditional love for me.
Breathing deeply and fully to the count of four (or more) and exhaling to the same count as the exhalation… but not forcing it.
When I do this at least six times, I feel less fearful…. and then I repeat the breathing until I feel the fear subside.
I have had some success using the a mindfulness practice like what you described. It helped a lot to also remind myself of my belief that I am immutably beloved by my higher power. But i am not always able to do either when the fear is still “in control,” as you say.
What helps me face fear is breathing and checking in. What am I feeling? Why am I feeling this way? What is the real reason I am having this reaction. Then acceptance. Telling myself it’s OK . Trying to recognize reality and not the story I am telling myself. I can’t control the first thought of fear, but I try to control my reactions afterwards.
Thank you for the video! I enjoyed hearing your perspective. What helps me face fear is to focus on the outcome/goal and the process of achieving to the outcome/goal.
The wisdom I have learned from Buddhist practices helps soften the edge of fear although it doesn’t entirely leave. Groundlessness is difficult and that’s where an odd type of “faith” in the uncertainty may happen. Intellectually I know this but physically making it happen within my mind and body is the practice. Not enlightened yet…
hi Tara, i have found that taking clients back in time in meditation or hypnotherapy to a safe happy recollection and asking them to re-experience this with all their senses is a great starting point. Then I give them a “key” to attach to the feelings of that time. Then allow the images to fade but hold the positive feelings and bring them forward in time to the present. They can use the key any time to access the feelings saying at the same time “I am safe here”.
Facing my fears includes being able to identify my fear(s) and emotions. I do my best to know myself- the good , the bad, and the ugly- and to grow from experiences. taking problems on 1 at a time – and honoring my growth each time has made me stronger… thereby able to take on the next task/problem. I also find it helps to give me strength to find the best in situations (also to count my blessings each morning before I get out of bed).
Prioritising others’ wellbeing and needs. It’s a sneaky thing as well as a kind thing as it gives me the moral high ground, it’s easier to have successes and I’m likely to have st least one other person on my side! But it works better than just trying to force myself to be bold.
Going for a run.
Thank you for this video. I have known for just a little while that to overcome fear, I have to embrace it. In fact, my coach and I have talked about fear being a way to close myself off from possibilities of who I truly am. Yet, knowing this and embracing fear are two different things. Along the way I have learned that allowing fear to control me means that I give up my power. I’m taking my power back. Your video reminded me the need to focus. Thank you.
Engaging with and in truth. Search for and explore truth. Being honest. Years ago, a soul friend asked me, What was the basis of my spirituality? “Being honest,” I answered.
I find it helpful to becomes conscious of my breath. To visualize my energy locking in with the (visualized) center of the earth. Also to take a deep breath before starting the task at hand and allow myself to be where I am.
When I’ve been in fearful situations, outside my comfort zone, I step back and imagine I am surrounded by white light. I remember that I am protected by angels and my spiritual guides. I stay calm and practice faith instead of fear. I don’t put energy into it. FEAR, false evidence appearing real.
Sitting with a client & creating a space of safety,trust & breath. Practicing breathing techniques when there are moments of calm, so these techniques can be brought to use in times of raised emotion
I have an operation coming up in a few days, and I’ve been feeling a lot of fear about it. One thing that’s helped me a lot with managing the fear are some yoga exercises I got out of a wonderful book called The Yoga CBT Workbook for Anxiety. All of the Kundalini yoga exercises in this book can be done sitting down, by people like me who are totally out of shape. I call it Couchalini yoga. Spending 20 minutes doing these exercises puts me in a far more centered and peaceful state of mind.
Trusting and relying on natural ways of healing. A shamanic practice and a life steeped in ceremony, working with allies from the animal, plant, and mineral realms, as well as Ancestral allyship.
Thank you for sharing your insight into fears, so many are grieving and suffering at this time.
Love…
Initially I notice that I hold my breath after a quick surprised inhale. Then I tell myself to breathe. This has been a learning process.
Eating
I spent years living a relatively fearless life. A few years ago, I experienced a series of traumatic events that devastated much of the life I had worked so hard to achieved. Now – with difficulty – I prepare carefully. I have a ritual around doing things that make me afraid. I always have a Plan B. Working this way hasn’t solved my fear, but it helps when I have a detailed plan for my activities – and a Plan B for contingencies. And if I’m stuck in a scary situation I can’t control, I do breathing exercises.
Thanks Tara,
I’m still trying to figure out how to face my terrible fear of reducing my anxiety meds that help me sleep. I have a huge fear of not sleeping. I’ve been dealing with this for a year and a half now. I’m really scared and have a very hard time feeling centered and calm. I go to my therapist once a week and am trying to practice meditation and positive affirmations, but I still have this huge huge fear, so don’t know how to face it yet.
I’ve walked through many fears during my lifetime so far, but this one has taken the cake. Still searching and trying every day to walk through this but just can’t seem to. I’m 62 and have GAD, just so you know.
Raising my hands with my palms facing up.
The way i work with fear is to try to be very brave and not run away. If I run away the fear becomes overwhelming and continues to haunt my mind.
Mindfulness practice and RAIN practice
Talking about the situation or problem helps me to face fear.
Mindfulness also helps me. I’m learning this skill now and I feel a better person because of it.
One of the mindful things I do is to unwind properly before sleeping. This entails a routine good for me, checking out of electronic stuff (fb, etc), relaxing by taking a few deep breaths, putting my tv onto sleep mode (background noise) and turning the volume down so I can just hear it, close my eyes during the ads and often in 5 minutes I am asleep.
This routine works for me so that I dont start thinking of the 1M+ things that I could and shouldn’t think of at bed time.
It’s also helping me to be more relaxed during the day. The PTSD I have has a way to go but not as far as yesterday. I like to remind myself of this.
NOOM has also helped me to lose weight, I’m not advertising just saying that it is helping me in my journey to mindful thinking for myself.
To breath, to observe my heart rate and respiration, how not inmediately reacting helps me to calm down myself and be able to think about what’s going on. That every thing is impermanente, so there is no reason to react so strongly. I do not want to suffer nor be causing any, so Maitri, Love is the best to calm down. Regular meditation helps me a lot to get focus in what really matters when anxiety arrives.
I can only relate how I handle fear sometimes by mentally going “outside of myself. Almost like I’m watching myself from a distance, then completing the action that has instilled fear in me. Speaking in a meeting, or in front of a group of people.
I’m a 75 year old worrier. I can see how my anxiety has contributed to my high blood pressure.Meditation helps but I will now begin the 3 Step Process – especially with hand on heart. The very idea gives me comfort. Now I’ll be an anti worry warrior!
There are 4 not 3 fear based responses.
Fight
Flight
Freeze
Fawn (placating the perpetrator)
I face fear when I look inside myself, during meditation or whole-body breathing.
But in these last months fear of the future (I’m 65), concerning my reality begins to trouble me as it has never been before. I think I can release the fear, but I’m not sleeping well and I’m having some trouble with my usual diet. Thanks for sharing.
What helps me face fear are the structure of a daily routine, the warmth and amusement of my animals( one dog, two cats), a laugh with a friend, a great book, or going outside under the sky and the trees to fill my bird feeders.
susan north
Slow breaths relaxing my chest while mentally or even physically feeling my feet by walking.
Meditation, talking with friends, mindfulness, exercise
What helps me is that the fear I feel is due to a creation of my mind and that I can stop it by looking into it and recognise that it’s not real. Even though I might feel that fear in my body, I can control it and make it subside
When I was 18-19 years old, I had a good friend say to me, “Why do you always apologize for everything, even things not your fault.” I immediately responded, “Oh! I am so sorry!” The, we both laughed and talked about something else.
His words stuck with me, though. I thought long and hard about them and realized my insuriety had become a big, warm, and comfy blanket I wrapped myself in whenever afraid of being rejected or unloved. I realized that it was no longer serving me in attaining my dreams,. In fact, it was now smothering me. I decided to visualize this blanket wrapped tightly around me while a raging bonfire appearedof fear appeared before me. I threw off the blanket and walked through the fire, freedfrom the insecurity and fear.
Today, some 42 years later, when fear appears, I turn from my flight, fight, or freeze and face it, recognize it, and let it fall away. I like better your idea of locating it in the body, breathing into it, asking what it wants, and releasing it. I suspect and hope that this method will aid me in more quickly recognizing when fear has re-appeared by tightness in my body scan. Thank you ❣️
A lot of my clients face fears with the support of their spiritual practices. With my assistance they also practice the skill of mindfulness awareness to investigate the underlying thought that fuels the fear. Thank you for sharing your wisdom, Tara.
Thanks to Rick Hanson and his Foundations of Wellbeing course, of which you are a part, getting in touch with basic Safety, Satisfaction and Connection, here and now, experienced bodily and emotionally, helps me face fear.
Thank you for all you do,
Bev
Being fully present with them and whatever they are experiencing. Also helping them become aware of their primary emotions that have been suppressed, via various methods like Reiki and mindfulness.
Thank you. I have been practicing mindfulness for quite a awhile. A physical condition that causes pain brought up fear. Today I was able to welcome the fear some and gave it a little hug so to speak. I realized it needed to be felt.
Also what I am learning from books by Shinzen Young on pain and mindfulness have helped.
Body scanning allows me the time and space to recognise when fear wants to take control. And feeling that tension in my body is the first step to befriending fear!
thank you, as many americans: talk to much, do not come to the point, console them with the basics, never tell them something important and sell it not before the next video, text, chapter … lol
Admitting and accepting my vulnerability.
How funny that I forgot the thing that is most close to me — when I face fear, I have no choice but to lean hard on my mantra.
Feeling fear yet facing it
Thinking of my dearly loved and departed grandmother when I feel anxious because I know that no matter what is going on, she was and is my greatest fan and hold unconditional love for me.
Tara Brach’s meditations help a lot too!
Breathing deeply and fully to the count of four (or more) and exhaling to the same count as the exhalation… but not forcing it.
When I do this at least six times, I feel less fearful…. and then I repeat the breathing until I feel the fear subside.
I have had some success using the a mindfulness practice like what you described. It helped a lot to also remind myself of my belief that I am immutably beloved by my higher power. But i am not always able to do either when the fear is still “in control,” as you say.
video wouldn’t play
What helps me face fear is breathing and checking in. What am I feeling? Why am I feeling this way? What is the real reason I am having this reaction. Then acceptance. Telling myself it’s OK . Trying to recognize reality and not the story I am telling myself. I can’t control the first thought of fear, but I try to control my reactions afterwards.
Experience
Really looking forward to hearing what Tara has to say.
For now What helps me face fear ?
In a word Support
Thank you for the video! I enjoyed hearing your perspective. What helps me face fear is to focus on the outcome/goal and the process of achieving to the outcome/goal.
The wisdom I have learned from Buddhist practices helps soften the edge of fear although it doesn’t entirely leave. Groundlessness is difficult and that’s where an odd type of “faith” in the uncertainty may happen. Intellectually I know this but physically making it happen within my mind and body is the practice. Not enlightened yet…
hi Tara, i have found that taking clients back in time in meditation or hypnotherapy to a safe happy recollection and asking them to re-experience this with all their senses is a great starting point. Then I give them a “key” to attach to the feelings of that time. Then allow the images to fade but hold the positive feelings and bring them forward in time to the present. They can use the key any time to access the feelings saying at the same time “I am safe here”.
Facing my fears includes being able to identify my fear(s) and emotions. I do my best to know myself- the good , the bad, and the ugly- and to grow from experiences. taking problems on 1 at a time – and honoring my growth each time has made me stronger… thereby able to take on the next task/problem. I also find it helps to give me strength to find the best in situations (also to count my blessings each morning before I get out of bed).
Prioritising others’ wellbeing and needs. It’s a sneaky thing as well as a kind thing as it gives me the moral high ground, it’s easier to have successes and I’m likely to have st least one other person on my side! But it works better than just trying to force myself to be bold.
Going for a run.
Thank you for this video. I have known for just a little while that to overcome fear, I have to embrace it. In fact, my coach and I have talked about fear being a way to close myself off from possibilities of who I truly am. Yet, knowing this and embracing fear are two different things. Along the way I have learned that allowing fear to control me means that I give up my power. I’m taking my power back. Your video reminded me the need to focus. Thank you.
Engaging with and in truth. Search for and explore truth. Being honest. Years ago, a soul friend asked me, What was the basis of my spirituality? “Being honest,” I answered.
I find it helpful to becomes conscious of my breath. To visualize my energy locking in with the (visualized) center of the earth. Also to take a deep breath before starting the task at hand and allow myself to be where I am.
When I’ve been in fearful situations, outside my comfort zone, I step back and imagine I am surrounded by white light. I remember that I am protected by angels and my spiritual guides. I stay calm and practice faith instead of fear. I don’t put energy into it. FEAR, false evidence appearing real.
My mantra is “just do the next best thing” to stay in the present moment.
Peace, quiet, and time to think through the reason(s) for my fear. It is not an automatic process.
Sitting with a client & creating a space of safety,trust & breath. Practicing breathing techniques when there are moments of calm, so these techniques can be brought to use in times of raised emotion
Spending time with my horses.
I have an operation coming up in a few days, and I’ve been feeling a lot of fear about it. One thing that’s helped me a lot with managing the fear are some yoga exercises I got out of a wonderful book called The Yoga CBT Workbook for Anxiety. All of the Kundalini yoga exercises in this book can be done sitting down, by people like me who are totally out of shape. I call it Couchalini yoga. Spending 20 minutes doing these exercises puts me in a far more centered and peaceful state of mind.
Trusting and relying on natural ways of healing. A shamanic practice and a life steeped in ceremony, working with allies from the animal, plant, and mineral realms, as well as Ancestral allyship.
Thank you for sharing your insight into fears, so many are grieving and suffering at this time.
Love…
Remember to remember. You have taught me so much. Can’t wait to meet you in June <3