The way you described yourself feeling on the camping trip in your youth is how I still feel at the age of 70. Sometimes I wish for life to be over so I can stop feeling so much self hatred. I watch a lot of your videos and YouTubes and have read one of your books and I am extremely fond of you. You always give me hope and bring it to me in ways I can understand. Thank you.
I felt like I should go to bed and sleep even though it is mid morning. I know I have things to do. I have a chronic illness and when I have a good day I fill fulfilled. When I am bed bound I don’t want to be around anyone except my cat
When you see the people who are suffering from self-worth in the video, it is so easy to see them as beautiful and drives the point home to be curious about why we cant see ourselves that way. I have spent a life time trying to answer that question for myself. The answer was so slow to change for so long. Journey to self is the most important effort in my life and the only thing I remain passion about. It has required a true braveness to confront myself and ask “what happened to me” and am I truly unlovable and not enough. It sure has taken me a long time to see the answer go from yes’ish (because I know yes is the wrong answer) to “silly question that no longer serves me”. Years spent scrutinizing every perceived attack or threat that I thought the source of my issues, finally started to fall away to reveal patterns and behaviors I created to protect myself as a child and still use today. That has brought so much awareness and compassion, not only for me, but for the same way everyone else got to where they are. I believe it is why we are here…to know ourselves, and the life lessons have been provided to teach me that tough material. I loved your book radical acceptance so enjoy following what you are doing and saying. It is people like you that have given me the necessary tools to finallly understand what “surrender” is and to embrace my authentic self. Thank you.
I was deeply touched, tears ran down my cheeks
when I felt, that despite my practice in meditation and mindfulness over years self-love, self-compassion, self-kindness have been missing mostly.
It is so hard to turn the critical view of oneself in self-love
When I brought kindness to what I was experiencing, I was able to get a purer glimpse of my true self, what I was really feeling, and what my truth looked like. When I brought kindness to myself, I could really hear myself and what I wanted to be doing with my time/life, versus what I am currently doing.
I am taking small steps, or rather, the steps are taking me! I am more aware of various unsettling emotions as they arise. I am less likely to react outwardly or just be unaware and unhappy, more able to take a moment of “pause” as Tara teaches. I place my hand on my heart and just breathe for a moment. This is a great gift in my life.
Thanks Tara so much for these free most needed topics and your expertise on them. I have followed your work for many years and want to meet you. I hope I come to a conference where you are presenting or attend your workshops.
Thanks for showing me how to be compassionate/kind to myself!!
Take care,
Huma.
Joyce Wilde, Counseling, Menomonee Falls, WI, USAsays
I have been feeling a great deal of anger and self doubt. My anger has become an issue at work which is totally unacceptable. When I brought kindness to my situation, I felt a slight rush of the emotions dislodge from my body. I feel less anxious. I was in great need of this message coming to me today. Thank you!
I felt a sense of acceptance. Being present and feeling lighter. My story got paused for a moment & I was free to be me.
Thank you for that mindful exercise
Exactly the encouragement I needed today to continue to live true to myself.
Also, “never doing enough for my world“ rang true as my feeling these days. I feel invited to bring compassion to this place in me and explore the invitation to live true.
Thank you!
When I brought attention to the pain in body (due to a terrible cold), I felt a softening. Rather then feeling like I needed to get over it, jump out of bed, fix it, or make it go away, there was an opening to healing and being with rather then running away or even ridiculing myself for being in this state. Thank you ?
I am happy to say, I was/ am in a place of peace. As I looked in to how I was feeling this morning, it was comfort, ease, serenity and so I sent kindness to being present with that sense of comfort with myself and life today in this moment. I look forward to learning the three steps.
Your words got to me, especially when you told your own story; it moved me to tears because it sounded so much like me.
I’ve struggled with self-loathing for decades. Sometimes I think I have a handle on it with self-talk, telling my self that I am worth being kind to and I’m actually a good person. I continue to slip. Thank you for your video.
As it is early in day for me and a weekend (therefore not experiencing stress of work & reputation) I am not in a complicated particularly stressful state but my arthritis and some of my aches are there. I do not like them. Generally I am struggling with more limitations of my body and getting older. I fear and really hate it. I wasn’t even that “great” physically as a younger person but I hate these changes just as I had come to accept my imperfect physical self. When I meditate or do as you suggested, I felt the escape from my mind to dwell on these fears. And I love being free to have the time. AND No one pulling or asking me to do for them… which is the core of my business as a services oriented provider.
I felt a calmness and reflected on the people that I have tried to be friends with but found it exhausting as I am trying to fit into a group that I do not belong , I’ve definitely not been true to myself . my strengths and qualities, I have a challenging job working with people with mental health problems or learning disabilities, it drains me of everything and there are not many people I can share it with or relate to, but inside I feel I give my best but I need to give my best to myself
When I asked ‘What’s Happening’, I got a very strong feeling in my throat of unvoiced hurt. And when I asked if it could be dealt with, with kindness the strong feeling dissipated and my body relaxed, a little. Thank you for sharing this. Ann
I found that first I stopped seeing him in the picture which then left me seeing only me with this feeling which then left me feeling it belongs to me only and he isn’t to blame…. Then I realised it’s myself who can heal this feeling and that I didn’t need anything from him and he’s not responsible for how I feel I then started feeling free from him and more whole as me and my energy felt stronger as if I could fly away from him. I felt more empowered and comfortable with myself and with the way I’d chosen to take care of myself after the event had occurred between us…. which was when I’d decided to get up and leave him to be in a different space where I could close the doors and just be with myself …. during this time by myself I had felt lots of uncomfortable and conflicting feelings of whose to blame etc…. until he brought my mobile to me and I came across your post and did this exercise. Finally I felt a lot lighter and at one point even felt like laughing…
Overwhelming grief at constant habitual self criticism. The words ‘kindness’ and ‘care’ towards myself feel alien and yet some space is opening up for a new way of being. Thank you Tara with all my heart x x
Thank u tara…i am in the midst of a very tough physical illness and realized just minutes before i found your new videosi have been fighting my body and its deep yearning know to deeply rest so its now ill and i am finally slowly allowing myself to let go of my need to control it and my family and life itself… your meditation simply furthered this gentle awakening that fear never heals no matter what form it takes…i have also been having a yearning for years to study with u..i am grateful for this series and the powerful work and gifts your example gives me…i am a gifted writer and yoga teacher and spiritual teacher and proud mother and its time i finally take the necessary rest time my body is craving so that i may spread these gifts and the gift of 13 years of chronic pain and the many traumas and addictive behaviours and self-doubt along with perfectionism i have endured….as all my years of struggle and regrets are now allowing me to fully embrace all the pain and use that embrace to spread Light into myself and my familt and into the world…i now choose, as hard as it seems to be, to start by going within and softening into the beaty that has been there all along .thank u tara..namaste ???
Fabulous video. when I did the exercise the feeling of fear around my situation seemed to lighten or I had taken a step back from being in the middle of it. Thank you I now feel hope has been given to me.
I felt relaxed with accepting my sadness. The thought of being kind to myself and my emotions were relieving and my upper shoulder felt relaxed. I felt comfortable being in my Skin.
Everything you experienced or felt about yourself in the mountains with your friend is exactly what I’m experiencing and feeling. I’m deeply sad, depressed and feel like I don’t belong anywhere.
I struggle and suffer almost daily.
Your voice and meditation talks help me so much. I know I’m not alone. You give me hope. Thank you
Jheel Jonen, teacher trainer, Munich Germany
I am 76 years old …. after 45 years of cultivating to be my own best friend – the feelings of unworthiness and self judgment are still coming up. Listening to you Tara made me realise that the “Early Conditioning” is implanted and only presence and a big smile can …. and daily practice help out of the trance. Thank you for your Talks Tara… you are such a loving helping being.
Susan Gorman, Exercise Physiology, Washington, IL, USAsays
All I could do was smile when I brought kindness to a feeling. Just listening to your gentle voice helps me to feel kindness toward myself. I feel a new gentleness rather than self judgment.
I realized I don’t give myself the compassion and patience I would give others, time to achieve and get positive results. One small failure, and I give up on myself.
Without re-connection with elements (soil, flora, fauna, sun, wind, etc.), without a strong re-partnership with nature, the ealing will not operate for a long time. Pour la suite du monde, we have to return to the trees. We need an enlighted ecopsychotherapy…
The way you described yourself feeling on the camping trip in your youth is how I still feel at the age of 70. Sometimes I wish for life to be over so I can stop feeling so much self hatred. I watch a lot of your videos and YouTubes and have read one of your books and I am extremely fond of you. You always give me hope and bring it to me in ways I can understand. Thank you.
A feeling of sadness followed by a sense of warmth
I felt very sad but then a gentle easing for a moment.
I felt like I should go to bed and sleep even though it is mid morning. I know I have things to do. I have a chronic illness and when I have a good day I fill fulfilled. When I am bed bound I don’t want to be around anyone except my cat
When you see the people who are suffering from self-worth in the video, it is so easy to see them as beautiful and drives the point home to be curious about why we cant see ourselves that way. I have spent a life time trying to answer that question for myself. The answer was so slow to change for so long. Journey to self is the most important effort in my life and the only thing I remain passion about. It has required a true braveness to confront myself and ask “what happened to me” and am I truly unlovable and not enough. It sure has taken me a long time to see the answer go from yes’ish (because I know yes is the wrong answer) to “silly question that no longer serves me”. Years spent scrutinizing every perceived attack or threat that I thought the source of my issues, finally started to fall away to reveal patterns and behaviors I created to protect myself as a child and still use today. That has brought so much awareness and compassion, not only for me, but for the same way everyone else got to where they are. I believe it is why we are here…to know ourselves, and the life lessons have been provided to teach me that tough material. I loved your book radical acceptance so enjoy following what you are doing and saying. It is people like you that have given me the necessary tools to finallly understand what “surrender” is and to embrace my authentic self. Thank you.
I was deeply touched, tears ran down my cheeks
when I felt, that despite my practice in meditation and mindfulness over years self-love, self-compassion, self-kindness have been missing mostly.
It is so hard to turn the critical view of oneself in self-love
I felt an aversion, discomfort, and my mind wandered elsewhere, almost as if there was an opposite charged magnet.
I realized that I need more time like this one. Telling yourself that you deserve it, because your are a nice person!!!
When I brought kindness to what I was experiencing, I was able to get a purer glimpse of my true self, what I was really feeling, and what my truth looked like. When I brought kindness to myself, I could really hear myself and what I wanted to be doing with my time/life, versus what I am currently doing.
Thank you for this Tara ?? I felt more supportive of myself- like I had my own back.
I am taking small steps, or rather, the steps are taking me! I am more aware of various unsettling emotions as they arise. I am less likely to react outwardly or just be unaware and unhappy, more able to take a moment of “pause” as Tara teaches. I place my hand on my heart and just breathe for a moment. This is a great gift in my life.
I imagined myself giving myself a hug. A pat on the back, saying to myself, ‘it’s ok’
But to be honest it felt fake ?
Thanks Tara so much for these free most needed topics and your expertise on them. I have followed your work for many years and want to meet you. I hope I come to a conference where you are presenting or attend your workshops.
Thanks for showing me how to be compassionate/kind to myself!!
Take care,
Huma.
I have been feeling a great deal of anger and self doubt. My anger has become an issue at work which is totally unacceptable. When I brought kindness to my situation, I felt a slight rush of the emotions dislodge from my body. I feel less anxious. I was in great need of this message coming to me today. Thank you!
I felt a sense of acceptance. Being present and feeling lighter. My story got paused for a moment & I was free to be me.
Thank you for that mindful exercise
Exactly the encouragement I needed today to continue to live true to myself.
Also, “never doing enough for my world“ rang true as my feeling these days. I feel invited to bring compassion to this place in me and explore the invitation to live true.
Thank you!
I went from feeling anxiety and fear and frustration with my self then broke down in tears!
I feel lighter, it feels like I was carrying more weight than what I really have. I love your words of wisdom, love and compassion. Thank you Tara!
First it was overwhelming, hard to focus- tears came- then I felt a glimmer of – joy?
Hopeful
When I brought attention to the pain in body (due to a terrible cold), I felt a softening. Rather then feeling like I needed to get over it, jump out of bed, fix it, or make it go away, there was an opening to healing and being with rather then running away or even ridiculing myself for being in this state. Thank you ?
Some of information I could relate and drew me into wanting more knowledge.
I am happy to say, I was/ am in a place of peace. As I looked in to how I was feeling this morning, it was comfort, ease, serenity and so I sent kindness to being present with that sense of comfort with myself and life today in this moment. I look forward to learning the three steps.
Your words got to me, especially when you told your own story; it moved me to tears because it sounded so much like me.
I’ve struggled with self-loathing for decades. Sometimes I think I have a handle on it with self-talk, telling my self that I am worth being kind to and I’m actually a good person. I continue to slip. Thank you for your video.
As it is early in day for me and a weekend (therefore not experiencing stress of work & reputation) I am not in a complicated particularly stressful state but my arthritis and some of my aches are there. I do not like them. Generally I am struggling with more limitations of my body and getting older. I fear and really hate it. I wasn’t even that “great” physically as a younger person but I hate these changes just as I had come to accept my imperfect physical self. When I meditate or do as you suggested, I felt the escape from my mind to dwell on these fears. And I love being free to have the time. AND No one pulling or asking me to do for them… which is the core of my business as a services oriented provider.
I felt a calmness and reflected on the people that I have tried to be friends with but found it exhausting as I am trying to fit into a group that I do not belong , I’ve definitely not been true to myself . my strengths and qualities, I have a challenging job working with people with mental health problems or learning disabilities, it drains me of everything and there are not many people I can share it with or relate to, but inside I feel I give my best but I need to give my best to myself
it’s getting easier
Was i to bring kindness to myself? I cried
When I asked ‘What’s Happening’, I got a very strong feeling in my throat of unvoiced hurt. And when I asked if it could be dealt with, with kindness the strong feeling dissipated and my body relaxed, a little. Thank you for sharing this. Ann
I found that first I stopped seeing him in the picture which then left me seeing only me with this feeling which then left me feeling it belongs to me only and he isn’t to blame…. Then I realised it’s myself who can heal this feeling and that I didn’t need anything from him and he’s not responsible for how I feel I then started feeling free from him and more whole as me and my energy felt stronger as if I could fly away from him. I felt more empowered and comfortable with myself and with the way I’d chosen to take care of myself after the event had occurred between us…. which was when I’d decided to get up and leave him to be in a different space where I could close the doors and just be with myself …. during this time by myself I had felt lots of uncomfortable and conflicting feelings of whose to blame etc…. until he brought my mobile to me and I came across your post and did this exercise. Finally I felt a lot lighter and at one point even felt like laughing…
I relax in my mind and body. I feel more at peace and the meaning of life appears in the small moments of now’s.
Overwhelming grief at constant habitual self criticism. The words ‘kindness’ and ‘care’ towards myself feel alien and yet some space is opening up for a new way of being. Thank you Tara with all my heart x x
A feeling of hope
I felt lighter for a short time.
Thank u tara…i am in the midst of a very tough physical illness and realized just minutes before i found your new videosi have been fighting my body and its deep yearning know to deeply rest so its now ill and i am finally slowly allowing myself to let go of my need to control it and my family and life itself… your meditation simply furthered this gentle awakening that fear never heals no matter what form it takes…i have also been having a yearning for years to study with u..i am grateful for this series and the powerful work and gifts your example gives me…i am a gifted writer and yoga teacher and spiritual teacher and proud mother and its time i finally take the necessary rest time my body is craving so that i may spread these gifts and the gift of 13 years of chronic pain and the many traumas and addictive behaviours and self-doubt along with perfectionism i have endured….as all my years of struggle and regrets are now allowing me to fully embrace all the pain and use that embrace to spread Light into myself and my familt and into the world…i now choose, as hard as it seems to be, to start by going within and softening into the beaty that has been there all along .thank u tara..namaste ???
Where can I see the following video?
Good to help acknowledge that we have these feelings. Helps to make a start on road to recovery
Thank you for your guidance. Self care is often very difficult to access.
Fabulous video. when I did the exercise the feeling of fear around my situation seemed to lighten or I had taken a step back from being in the middle of it. Thank you I now feel hope has been given to me.
The video brought up lots of feelings and emotions for me. The most important thing is to treat everyone with kindness.
Especially ourselves.
A feeling of lightness and lifting
I felt relaxed with accepting my sadness. The thought of being kind to myself and my emotions were relieving and my upper shoulder felt relaxed. I felt comfortable being in my Skin.
Everything you experienced or felt about yourself in the mountains with your friend is exactly what I’m experiencing and feeling. I’m deeply sad, depressed and feel like I don’t belong anywhere.
I struggle and suffer almost daily.
Your voice and meditation talks help me so much. I know I’m not alone. You give me hope. Thank you
Jheel Jonen, teacher trainer, Munich Germany
I am 76 years old …. after 45 years of cultivating to be my own best friend – the feelings of unworthiness and self judgment are still coming up. Listening to you Tara made me realise that the “Early Conditioning” is implanted and only presence and a big smile can …. and daily practice help out of the trance. Thank you for your Talks Tara… you are such a loving helping being.
My breathing changed I became more relaxed accepting
All I could do was smile when I brought kindness to a feeling. Just listening to your gentle voice helps me to feel kindness toward myself. I feel a new gentleness rather than self judgment.
I realized I don’t give myself the compassion and patience I would give others, time to achieve and get positive results. One small failure, and I give up on myself.
I started to cry and my chest hurt where my heart is so I held it with my two hands offering myself compassion and encouragement – thank you
Without re-connection with elements (soil, flora, fauna, sun, wind, etc.), without a strong re-partnership with nature, the ealing will not operate for a long time. Pour la suite du monde, we have to return to the trees. We need an enlighted ecopsychotherapy…
My anger/irritation was defused and I became aware of another perspective.
I was really afraid.