A powerful experience, thank you. Letting go of judgement and blame would bring me closer to being freer, kinder (to myself and others), and closer to the person who I want and strive to be. A step closer to living the best life I can.
I feel the potential power of this work as I see my resistance to feel to much, it may take me out for good, and the insidious belief of I am a failure and my psychotherapist sisters words of you are a bully and an abuser because I asked to see a copy of my dad’s will…. I note your comments on embarking with care not too violent ensuring external safety and support and inner resilience which I have the first but not so much the latter thank you ? for your heart based work ?
Judging self as way to grow…there is truth about this in my reality. Going beyond blame through forgiveness…hard for me to stay with this process. I wonder if someone will develop infographics on these meditations.
Thank you so much Tara. I found your three videos to be extremely helpful and look forward to working through the steps you provided. However, I am wondering if it is appropriate to try moving from blame to compassion in a verbally & emotionally abusive relationship?
Paul Bosky, Stress Management, Oakland, CA, USAsays
Thank you for this wonderful teaching. These seem like really powerful tools to help with self-transformation. I am very appreciative for this work. I felt the warmth of some very strong emotions welling up inside me as I did the exercise in the recording.
I know that I never loved myself truly.And now I do.I am enough whatever happened in the past.Doing the U turn, I noticed that I let go of my need to loved and wanted only pure presence from friends, from people.And I turn away from just be the love out of needness.I forgive people,but at the moment I am not able to walk along with them.Actually it depends also on their will to talk about what happened, but when there is silence after asking,I don’t have the heart to take the whole responsability for the relationship to keep going, so I walk away.In my past I used to save all relationships out of my kindness, even though deep inside I wanted to scream and shout for the way I was treated,So know, I walk away.I can’t do more than this, even though I realize that the person that hurt me, propably feels the same:that he/she is not enough!
Cynthia Caspi, Counseling, Belle Harbor, NY, USAsays
Tara… I have been listening to your podcast for a few months now I was on vacation with my youngest son and after the first day we each experienced feeling hurt. I wasn’t able to fall asleep and listened to your podcast where you talked about the RAIN process. In the morning I shared the process with my son (19 ). After we both recognized, allowed, investigated and nurtured our feelings we were able to be compassionate and vulnerable…. we had the best vacation traveling throughput Italy and Egypt. A true game changer. This last podcast on the double arrow and blame is another example of your ability to help shift consciousness from obsessive thinking to compassion and love. Thank you for your dedication…,you are impacting the lives of generations of human beings.
Tara, I love listening to you. What you have said in these three videos is a complete shift of perspective. That shift that will make us much feerer and happier, let me say so!
The idea of the U-turn and that of looking at the vulnerability in others as well as in me, opens the field to forgiveness and self-compassion that is so difficult to reach at times.
A lifetime of self doubt and lack of confidence left me vulnerable to finding “worth” outside of myself and finding “love” outside of my marriage. Over the past 5 years I have discovered these steps, ever so slowly. I am currently working to revive my artistic career, and I have practiced letting go of the old stories of “I can’t,” I’m not good enough,” etc. and encouraging myself to just take one step at a time. Being kind to myself has been essential. Compassion enables me to love myself, my husband and my life. I am gaining confidence in my skills and abilities (which were always there–I just didn’t believe in them!) I am now on a journey of discovery–discovering who I am. I really appreciate your teachings, which inform my role as sponsor in my 12-step program.
I have been working through so much sadness and disappointment this past year. This last video allowed for some much needed healing tears. Being with myself as I had doped others would be with me.
Tina Murray, Another Field, Takoma Park, MD, USAsays
It’s amazing to me to be holding on to negative feelings about my relationship with my parents. Even though they have both been gone for over a decade, this still colors to the relationships I have with remaining family I have left. This suggests a way out. Thanks Tara.
Hi Tara. I think I would be the person I would like to be. Authentic and true, but with an open heart, fully embracing the dualities of life, and above all else, I would feel a deep sense of inner peace! I would have more energy too. Judgement and blame take a lot out of you. X
I would be connected to my true self and to the oneness of the universe, and it would be miraculous! There would be no separation, only love. Thanks Tara!
I sobbed as I listened to Stephan’s story because it mirrored my experience with my mother. Thank you for the liberating compassion practices you teach!
Jacksiep Chatlas, Social Work, Smyrna, DE, USAsays
I believe if I let go of my anger towards my exhusband, that my friends would enjoy my company more. Not only would I stop going over the old judgemental history, I would also,be mor pleasant to be with and have more exciting conversation to offer. I practiced turning the feeling around. I am very aware and ashamed of my own behavior in the relationanship. I also know how his “leg was caught in the trap.” It was just a habit to keep blaming. Him to keep me from exploring my own involvement that was shameful.
Thank you for these tools, I will definitely be using them. My answer to your question, If I let all my emotional pain go, I would be the person I have always wanted to be, happy! Humm, you have really given me a lot to ponder, thank you so much, this could be a turning point for me!
All 3 videos are amazing and Tara at her usual best. I found them very helpful and hope there is some way I can access them after tonight??
thank you!
sue
I would be more patient with myself and more accepting of myself and others. Seeing through different perspective of the u turn and seeing others vulnerability offers an emotion of opening up the heart space.
I feel emotional. I can release old pain and feel much lighter.
Thank you for this –I will be able to use these thoughts with confidence while working with my clients.
Thank you so much, Tara. I found the final meditative piece to be deeply moving and healing.
Thank you!! It was very right message for me to turn back to myself with loving kindness, look deeply, and be present for the wounded part of myself.
Thank you Tara. This is work in progress for me towards a more compassionate version of myself.
I would have more people in my life.
I love the analogy of the dog whose leg is in a trap-more powerful than ‘hurt people hurt people ‘
tearful!
A powerful experience, thank you. Letting go of judgement and blame would bring me closer to being freer, kinder (to myself and others), and closer to the person who I want and strive to be. A step closer to living the best life I can.
Thank you Tara, as always I feel I gain so much when I listen to you. I shall continue to use these practices.
I feel the potential power of this work as I see my resistance to feel to much, it may take me out for good, and the insidious belief of I am a failure and my psychotherapist sisters words of you are a bully and an abuser because I asked to see a copy of my dad’s will…. I note your comments on embarking with care not too violent ensuring external safety and support and inner resilience which I have the first but not so much the latter thank you ? for your heart based work ?
I will be a happy person and will interact with people. Now I’m and hermitage that’s always avoiding people so no one can an ask me how am I.
I would live much more in the present moment and enjoy life fully. Thank you for these videos and practices.
Judging self as way to grow…there is truth about this in my reality. Going beyond blame through forgiveness…hard for me to stay with this process. I wonder if someone will develop infographics on these meditations.
Thank you… very informative and helpful
Thanks Tara. I felt scared, lonely and sad.
A more loving and compassionate human towards myself and others.
Thank you so much Tara. I found your three videos to be extremely helpful and look forward to working through the steps you provided. However, I am wondering if it is appropriate to try moving from blame to compassion in a verbally & emotionally abusive relationship?
Thank you,
Jennifer
Yes, I did feel a softening – thank you
Thank you for this wonderful teaching. These seem like really powerful tools to help with self-transformation. I am very appreciative for this work. I felt the warmth of some very strong emotions welling up inside me as I did the exercise in the recording.
I know that I never loved myself truly.And now I do.I am enough whatever happened in the past.Doing the U turn, I noticed that I let go of my need to loved and wanted only pure presence from friends, from people.And I turn away from just be the love out of needness.I forgive people,but at the moment I am not able to walk along with them.Actually it depends also on their will to talk about what happened, but when there is silence after asking,I don’t have the heart to take the whole responsability for the relationship to keep going, so I walk away.In my past I used to save all relationships out of my kindness, even though deep inside I wanted to scream and shout for the way I was treated,So know, I walk away.I can’t do more than this, even though I realize that the person that hurt me, propably feels the same:that he/she is not enough!
Happy, joyous and free…
Thank you for these videos.
So helpful! Thank you!
Tara… I have been listening to your podcast for a few months now I was on vacation with my youngest son and after the first day we each experienced feeling hurt. I wasn’t able to fall asleep and listened to your podcast where you talked about the RAIN process. In the morning I shared the process with my son (19 ). After we both recognized, allowed, investigated and nurtured our feelings we were able to be compassionate and vulnerable…. we had the best vacation traveling throughput Italy and Egypt. A true game changer. This last podcast on the double arrow and blame is another example of your ability to help shift consciousness from obsessive thinking to compassion and love. Thank you for your dedication…,you are impacting the lives of generations of human beings.
Tara, I love listening to you. What you have said in these three videos is a complete shift of perspective. That shift that will make us much feerer and happier, let me say so!
The idea of the U-turn and that of looking at the vulnerability in others as well as in me, opens the field to forgiveness and self-compassion that is so difficult to reach at times.
I guess I would have more energy.
So very helpful, I shared it with my husband, and we had a lovely chat about it.
Tracy
A lifetime of self doubt and lack of confidence left me vulnerable to finding “worth” outside of myself and finding “love” outside of my marriage. Over the past 5 years I have discovered these steps, ever so slowly. I am currently working to revive my artistic career, and I have practiced letting go of the old stories of “I can’t,” I’m not good enough,” etc. and encouraging myself to just take one step at a time. Being kind to myself has been essential. Compassion enables me to love myself, my husband and my life. I am gaining confidence in my skills and abilities (which were always there–I just didn’t believe in them!) I am now on a journey of discovery–discovering who I am. I really appreciate your teachings, which inform my role as sponsor in my 12-step program.
I could be me … just me … not that mother, daughter or sister so misunderstood and written off.
Truly a much free-er, contented, happier, loving person. ?
Thank you for reminding me, that I can’t show the path of healing to others if I don’t follow this path myself.
I have been working through so much sadness and disappointment this past year. This last video allowed for some much needed healing tears. Being with myself as I had doped others would be with me.
It’s amazing to me to be holding on to negative feelings about my relationship with my parents. Even though they have both been gone for over a decade, this still colors to the relationships I have with remaining family I have left. This suggests a way out. Thanks Tara.
Thank you so much. It helps me see a path. I have some steps to still traverse, but I’m trying.
Having compassion for my own pain makes it much easier to have compassion for others who are also in blame and shame
Hi Tara. I think I would be the person I would like to be. Authentic and true, but with an open heart, fully embracing the dualities of life, and above all else, I would feel a deep sense of inner peace! I would have more energy too. Judgement and blame take a lot out of you. X
I would be free to be ME!! ?
A happy person
I would be connected to my true self and to the oneness of the universe, and it would be miraculous! There would be no separation, only love. Thanks Tara!
I would be freer and more open to connect with what’s triggered in me, and then heal my own pain.
I sobbed as I listened to Stephan’s story because it mirrored my experience with my mother. Thank you for the liberating compassion practices you teach!
Sincerely,
Mary Y
Open, soft, volnerable. More conected and relaxed
I believe if I let go of my anger towards my exhusband, that my friends would enjoy my company more. Not only would I stop going over the old judgemental history, I would also,be mor pleasant to be with and have more exciting conversation to offer. I practiced turning the feeling around. I am very aware and ashamed of my own behavior in the relationanship. I also know how his “leg was caught in the trap.” It was just a habit to keep blaming. Him to keep me from exploring my own involvement that was shameful.
Thank you for these tools, I will definitely be using them. My answer to your question, If I let all my emotional pain go, I would be the person I have always wanted to be, happy! Humm, you have really given me a lot to ponder, thank you so much, this could be a turning point for me!
All 3 videos are amazing and Tara at her usual best. I found them very helpful and hope there is some way I can access them after tonight??
thank you!
sue
I would be someone I have never known. Will I experience the same joy as I do when I make a new friend? Mary Ann Budin
My true authentic self
Powerful stuff.
Very peaceful within myself
I would be free to evolve in to whom I wish to see my Self be. My most fulfilled, “highest” Self.
I would be more patient with myself and more accepting of myself and others. Seeing through different perspective of the u turn and seeing others vulnerability offers an emotion of opening up the heart space.
I feel emotional. I can release old pain and feel much lighter.
Thank you for this –I will be able to use these thoughts with confidence while working with my clients.