Really appreciated your sharing here. Helps me remember my own journey to self understanding and self caring in order to be more available to others. Just starting out with facilitating Mindfulness small group.
I’ve recently undergone such a transformation. I was married to someone who abused me both physically and emotionally for twenty years. It had taken me 18 years to forgive him. I’m even
learning to forgive myself. This was very helpful with some things I’m experiencing in my current marriage. It helped to see that he has been wounded as well. Thank you!
I find it so easy to get ‘stuck’ in my story, that I really need to make the u-turn a part of my daily habits. My bitterness and resentment can feel so warranted, but by asking myself what I’m REALLY feeling underneath the anger can help me move past it better. Thank-you.
Thanks, I have accepted the responsibility of understanding myself. The part that was most difficult for me was realizing and accepting the hurt I experienced at the hands of my father. Experiencing the feelings I had buried, uncovering my intricate survival mechanisms and disabling them, has allowed me to enjoy life in unexpected ways.
Simmie Davis, Social Work, CLEVELAND Heights , OH, USAsays
This one by far was the most difficult I was able to make the U-turn I was able to make the connection but when it came To let it GoI had to really think about How to support myself and to have compassion for myself then I could go back and have good Passion for this person
Possibly more attention to the dangers of re traumatizing, unleashing overwhelming emotion, and becoming incapacitated , without prior development of resilience For me it has been a slow cautious journey , but I am finding self acceptance, and compassion are the healing balm of recovery
I find your videos helpful, giving structure and guidance to my raw attempts to heal. After doing the u-turn and then allowing compassion back, I find myself saying, “but you still shouldn’t have done that to me”. I seem to understand the other person’s woundedness, but feel their spreading it around unacceptable in my life. Your analogies are always spot on & helpful.
Thank you for opening the door and inviting me into the a room full of self-love and self-compassion that awaits my acceptance. These gifts will provide me with the strength and ability to live in tune with the song that lies unwritten and unsung in my heart. My voice will be now be sweeten by the compassion, forgiveness and love of which we are each so deserving.
Sara ?
Unfortunately I couldn’t do this one. I find it difficult to think of small things when there’s been so much trauma in my life. Everything seems to be in one melting pot and differentiating is vitually impoosible.
Sally Clement, Psychotherapy, Ann Arbor, MI, USAsays
This content was very helpful to me as a psychiatric nurse practitioner to guide my work with patients who have complex trauma history. I consistently educate and use MM with patients, and refer patients to Tara Brach’s web page to use guided audio MM practices. My husband and I also use these and enjoy Tara’s weekly talks at her center in DC. Thank you for continuing to provide these very important tools and resources which aid clinicians and clients.
Sally
What an incredibly valuable lesson. I adore the allegory and the easy access to strategies for compassion and self-compassion. Thank you so much I found the U-Turn and the Dog leg-trap visuals deeply impactful. I find myself mirroring that Tara Brach smile that flashes everyone now and then during these presentations. That smile has a shine full of love and kindness, thank you!
I found that i still have very raw hurt after 15 years. the incident involved my husbands family and i find i still feel a huge amount of resentment towards them. It allows me (wrongly) to take the upper hand. This way i protect myself from them. Patricia
It makes me wonder if compassion is in our genes or is it a learned element of interaction. My entire family (including myself) seems to be short of compassion for others and especially ourselves. Thank you for this wonderful enlightenment.. It does not come by nature but I will certainly focus on it.
margaret, (marnie) aeschlimann, Another Field, CAsays
Gradually and painfully i have come to understand the behavior/abuse of my parents etc in an historical context; the passing down of patterns from one generation to the next. I have come to actually know them as products of all sorts of circumstances including poverty, religion and war. So i have by extension, learned to regard people in my life now as having a leg of their own in a trap of their own. It colours everything. I can get supremely angry at the institutions at the bottom of all this suffering. I grieve deeply for humanity and the suffering we cause.
I would not be the mean girl who talks to me like she does. I I know I can be more open to compassion. I was an RN for a long time. I blame the corporate world taking me away from my beloved career. I think I closed up after trying to protect myself from all of the bad shit that was going on as well as my abusive childhood. I am sometimes so lost. My daughter has been supportive but she also has wounds that she I think, blames me for. And I feel worse then. Because I want to be the mom I think I wanted to be. There again, I was a good mom but my self expectations are that I am not good enough. I really heard what you said Tara and I thank you for this series
I had plenty of experiences to bring to this exercise; a very familiar one that came up just a few days ago. I immediately felt the softening of my heart for myself with the reminder that it was ok to feel the feelings of not being heard and respected (previously I would more likely lash out), and then opened my bowl of compassion in the U-turn ex, and put both of us in that inner bowl of compassion. Thank you. The timing of this video was synchronis as I had recently put out the intention to be ‘curious’ about this person, rather than being ‘right’. I added the ‘bond of Love’ that is the perfection we are called to in scripture. Lovely!
I’d be a much nicer person…more relaxed. Judging & blaming take a lot of energy that I could use much more productively. While I’m not a professional, I try to help other people as I’ve been helped over the years. Judging is a waste of my time, and of theirs.
Well I’m still drying my eyes. I’m not ready to be compassionate to he who hurt me because it means I go back to blaming myself for causing him to do what he did. And then it all starts over again.
But I’m really tired of feeling like crap.
It makes me feel in touch with the deep sadness I have about being so alone in a world where nothing seems to work like it should, where everything is unequal and exploitive and rejecting and immoral. But I feel lighter and the pain in my gut feels lessened when I try to feel peace.
I found that I could see that her ‘leg was in a trap, but she has bitten me so many times that although I understood her pain I was fed up with her giving it to me! This is someone in my family that I have loved dearly, supported as much as I was able and I have decided I don’t want her to bite me anymore, It hurts too much.
Your courses, related books and focused videos, provide excellent materials with which to build a strong, safe “nest.”
My more mindful interleaving and layering
of insights, have enabled deeper feelings
of connectedness to the world within and outside of myself. This video enables ways
to balance universal, yet personal, feelings
of inadequacy with competency and to balance feelings of doubt, blame and shame with forgiveness. By exercising my wings of awareness and compassion, I have begun to fly further from my “nest”, with confidence and to return, with humility. Namaste!
If I let go of judgment and chronic blame I would be feeling more. Right now I feel so blah, weighed down, it’s like I feel nothing but anger, frustration, anxiety, depression. Even when I try to feel something else I can’t seem to get there. It’s been really frustrating. Even meditation and yoga practice isn’t helping. But today I felt something positive, it was just a little, but it was enough to make me feel lighter.
I would have more self compassion and more awarness and compassionate of others sufferings, I could move one step forward in treating my GAD. Thank you for sharing!
Thx, Tara! I was just stuck in some resentment towards a client who was demanding far too much time and attention (compared to the assignment) and at the same time forgetting an appointment, being quite rude etc. Now i feel free again. Not that i agree with the client’s actions, but at least i feel at home with myself again and “free” of these negative feelings that were tumbling on inside me. Offering self compassion proved to be the bridge to transform these feelings and to opening up / waking up to the moment.
I would be more at peace. Finding reason doesn’t always eliminate the issues in life. It could lead to more issues! I do no need to justify my existence. Thanks for sharing you insights and techniques.
Really appreciated your sharing here. Helps me remember my own journey to self understanding and self caring in order to be more available to others. Just starting out with facilitating Mindfulness small group.
I would be kinder and more compassionate to myself and others.
I would be more caring of myself and therefore capable of experiencing the care I feel for others and to be able to not need to hide that caring.
I would have more space in my mind and heart to love and judge favorably.
Very helpful
Thank you Tara. There are a lot of trapped dogs out there! Myself included! Thank you for helping me remember that. Blessings.
I’ve recently undergone such a transformation. I was married to someone who abused me both physically and emotionally for twenty years. It had taken me 18 years to forgive him. I’m even
learning to forgive myself. This was very helpful with some things I’m experiencing in my current marriage. It helped to see that he has been wounded as well. Thank you!
Thank you for this insightful work and its practical application kindest regards Angela
Hi Tara! I would be free to love and live fully!! XO, Gabriela
this sounds very similar to non violent communication created by marshall rosenberg. it is always helpful to hear it in a different way
I find it so easy to get ‘stuck’ in my story, that I really need to make the u-turn a part of my daily habits. My bitterness and resentment can feel so warranted, but by asking myself what I’m REALLY feeling underneath the anger can help me move past it better. Thank-you.
Thanks, I have accepted the responsibility of understanding myself. The part that was most difficult for me was realizing and accepting the hurt I experienced at the hands of my father. Experiencing the feelings I had buried, uncovering my intricate survival mechanisms and disabling them, has allowed me to enjoy life in unexpected ways.
Deeply grateful.
Feels like the key. Appreciate the warning of the danger of going to quickly to compassion for the other.
This one by far was the most difficult I was able to make the U-turn I was able to make the connection but when it came To let it GoI had to really think about How to support myself and to have compassion for myself then I could go back and have good Passion for this person
Possibly more attention to the dangers of re traumatizing, unleashing overwhelming emotion, and becoming incapacitated , without prior development of resilience For me it has been a slow cautious journey , but I am finding self acceptance, and compassion are the healing balm of recovery
I would be more at peace and more compassionate- with myself and the world. My heart would be lighter.
I find your videos helpful, giving structure and guidance to my raw attempts to heal. After doing the u-turn and then allowing compassion back, I find myself saying, “but you still shouldn’t have done that to me”. I seem to understand the other person’s woundedness, but feel their spreading it around unacceptable in my life. Your analogies are always spot on & helpful.
I would be safe for others, loving towards mysemf and others, identifyi g with the ocean.
This approach is helpful. Thanks for the insights.
Thank you for opening the door and inviting me into the a room full of self-love and self-compassion that awaits my acceptance. These gifts will provide me with the strength and ability to live in tune with the song that lies unwritten and unsung in my heart. My voice will be now be sweeten by the compassion, forgiveness and love of which we are each so deserving.
Sara ?
Unfortunately I couldn’t do this one. I find it difficult to think of small things when there’s been so much trauma in my life. Everything seems to be in one melting pot and differentiating is vitually impoosible.
This content was very helpful to me as a psychiatric nurse practitioner to guide my work with patients who have complex trauma history. I consistently educate and use MM with patients, and refer patients to Tara Brach’s web page to use guided audio MM practices. My husband and I also use these and enjoy Tara’s weekly talks at her center in DC. Thank you for continuing to provide these very important tools and resources which aid clinicians and clients.
Sally
What an incredibly valuable lesson. I adore the allegory and the easy access to strategies for compassion and self-compassion. Thank you so much I found the U-Turn and the Dog leg-trap visuals deeply impactful. I find myself mirroring that Tara Brach smile that flashes everyone now and then during these presentations. That smile has a shine full of love and kindness, thank you!
I found that i still have very raw hurt after 15 years. the incident involved my husbands family and i find i still feel a huge amount of resentment towards them. It allows me (wrongly) to take the upper hand. This way i protect myself from them. Patricia
It makes me wonder if compassion is in our genes or is it a learned element of interaction. My entire family (including myself) seems to be short of compassion for others and especially ourselves. Thank you for this wonderful enlightenment.. It does not come by nature but I will certainly focus on it.
Thank you. This was very helpful.
I want so much to practise these techniques but there is resistance
Gradually and painfully i have come to understand the behavior/abuse of my parents etc in an historical context; the passing down of patterns from one generation to the next. I have come to actually know them as products of all sorts of circumstances including poverty, religion and war. So i have by extension, learned to regard people in my life now as having a leg of their own in a trap of their own. It colours everything. I can get supremely angry at the institutions at the bottom of all this suffering. I grieve deeply for humanity and the suffering we cause.
I would not be the mean girl who talks to me like she does. I I know I can be more open to compassion. I was an RN for a long time. I blame the corporate world taking me away from my beloved career. I think I closed up after trying to protect myself from all of the bad shit that was going on as well as my abusive childhood. I am sometimes so lost. My daughter has been supportive but she also has wounds that she I think, blames me for. And I feel worse then. Because I want to be the mom I think I wanted to be. There again, I was a good mom but my self expectations are that I am not good enough. I really heard what you said Tara and I thank you for this series
Perhaps I would me me again
I would be more open, less guarded, and much more generous.
Thank you Tara. Please tell me more.
I would be able to focus more on my mission.
I had plenty of experiences to bring to this exercise; a very familiar one that came up just a few days ago. I immediately felt the softening of my heart for myself with the reminder that it was ok to feel the feelings of not being heard and respected (previously I would more likely lash out), and then opened my bowl of compassion in the U-turn ex, and put both of us in that inner bowl of compassion. Thank you. The timing of this video was synchronis as I had recently put out the intention to be ‘curious’ about this person, rather than being ‘right’. I added the ‘bond of Love’ that is the perfection we are called to in scripture. Lovely!
I would be able to be myself. Like a weight was lifted. Amazing and powerful exercise.
I’d be a much nicer person…more relaxed. Judging & blaming take a lot of energy that I could use much more productively. While I’m not a professional, I try to help other people as I’ve been helped over the years. Judging is a waste of my time, and of theirs.
I felt at peace with myself
I felt at peace
Thank you. Some optimism experienced as my heart opened to a shift internally in a behavior pattern that has been difficult to change externally.
Well I’m still drying my eyes. I’m not ready to be compassionate to he who hurt me because it means I go back to blaming myself for causing him to do what he did. And then it all starts over again.
But I’m really tired of feeling like crap.
It makes me feel in touch with the deep sadness I have about being so alone in a world where nothing seems to work like it should, where everything is unequal and exploitive and rejecting and immoral. But I feel lighter and the pain in my gut feels lessened when I try to feel peace.
I would be more at peace.
I found that I could see that her ‘leg was in a trap, but she has bitten me so many times that although I understood her pain I was fed up with her giving it to me! This is someone in my family that I have loved dearly, supported as much as I was able and I have decided I don’t want her to bite me anymore, It hurts too much.
If I let go of judgement and chronic blame, I would be free to walk away, whether or not i choose to.
Your courses, related books and focused videos, provide excellent materials with which to build a strong, safe “nest.”
My more mindful interleaving and layering
of insights, have enabled deeper feelings
of connectedness to the world within and outside of myself. This video enables ways
to balance universal, yet personal, feelings
of inadequacy with competency and to balance feelings of doubt, blame and shame with forgiveness. By exercising my wings of awareness and compassion, I have begun to fly further from my “nest”, with confidence and to return, with humility. Namaste!
This is just another valuable part of my healing into Being a WHOLE person. Thank you
If I let go of judgment and chronic blame I would be feeling more. Right now I feel so blah, weighed down, it’s like I feel nothing but anger, frustration, anxiety, depression. Even when I try to feel something else I can’t seem to get there. It’s been really frustrating. Even meditation and yoga practice isn’t helping. But today I felt something positive, it was just a little, but it was enough to make me feel lighter.
Helped me to return to making the healthier choice of forgiveness again; great reminder/refresher!
I would have more self compassion and more awarness and compassionate of others sufferings, I could move one step forward in treating my GAD. Thank you for sharing!
Thx, Tara! I was just stuck in some resentment towards a client who was demanding far too much time and attention (compared to the assignment) and at the same time forgetting an appointment, being quite rude etc. Now i feel free again. Not that i agree with the client’s actions, but at least i feel at home with myself again and “free” of these negative feelings that were tumbling on inside me. Offering self compassion proved to be the bridge to transform these feelings and to opening up / waking up to the moment.
I would be more at peace. Finding reason doesn’t always eliminate the issues in life. It could lead to more issues! I do no need to justify my existence. Thanks for sharing you insights and techniques.