I was wondering if I am truly living the life I want to live or trying to (very successfully) live up to others expectations and impress them. I am more and more accepting everything about my being and ready to embrace the negative thoughts, feelings and sensations that come up every now and then. Yesterday I was truly grateful to be able to release and weep about some recent challenges in child’s pose feeling very refreshed and cleansed after.
Also reading radical acceptance right now. Listening to her and Jack for years now <3
Have been practicing RAIN for some time and when I acknowledge what is happening, accept without judgment and with kindness, it is a relief. There is peace. Thanks Tara
Nancy Jacobsen, Another Field, Grass Valley , CA, USAsays
Thank you Tara for sharing about yourself & your journey. I am struggling with my aging body, the aches & pains of ordinary arthritis. I have tried to accept my limitations without judgment. I value listening to your voice so much. You know what’s weird, I connect with your teaching much easier than I do with other “wise men” of our age. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
Nancy
First, I’ve been doing your meditations longer ones almost or about 20 min daily. It is making a shift. But I still struggle with anxiety, self doubt, worry and fear and not enjoying the beautiful life I have. This is generational and baked into my DNA. Today when i brought kindness i was able to say to myself, it’s OK sweetheart if you don’t accomplish a lot today, and let yourself feel sad on this rainy day surrounded by your dogs. I’m going to meditate now as I haven’t yet today and that also helps me make this shift. I think the meditation on it in this video wasn’t enough of the medicine. Lovely talk. Kind of a nice short version of what I’m hearing in your meditations and talks on your podcast. Thanks so much. You have really changed my life and the life of my husband.
I felt warmth and love. But in this moment it was easy because I was generally in a good mood. But usually bringing kindness to my experiences almost always goes hand in hand with a sense of relief and homecoming.
Thank you for the video and the questions Tara. I have been feeling angry a lot lately, and am trying to understand why. During the video, I brought kindness to my feelings as I would an angry patient (I’m a nurse) and looked at myself through my nursing eyes. I felt wounded, I saw an angry, pouting little girl. I’m going to try to understand her more and be more patient with her. It was a feeling of “I’m going to take better care of her.”
A very good friend of mine has been struggling with herself for years and still is because she cannot forgive herself that she cannot love her elder sisters. She always remembers them not having treated her as they should. They were already adult when she was born and she did not feel enough respect from them. And, worst, they did not respect her rights when their parents died, so that she feels cheated by them re. the family heritage. – But her problem, as she put it is that she feels guilty of not loving them as she should do as a good sister and as she feels that this would be normal. This lady is 47 now and not married. And she thinks that her toxic relationship to her sisters – who live far away in another European country and whom she does not meet – prevented her to have a husband and a family of her own so far. She feels blocked by her own feeling guilty of not loving them as she thinks should be normal. She had psychotherapy and she told me her story several times – so far I could not find the right tender words for her. She does not want to hear anything like MSC, she thinks that does not go deep enough for her feeling of guilt and shame. So, dear Tara, please help. Thank you for all your loving advice, Edit from Austria
Wes McIntyre, Health Education, Pasco, WA, USAsays
I found that in general and in most, though not all specifics, I like myself. But I know I can be defensive when criticized and it has a reactive quality to it. I would really like an alternative to that defensive reactivity that doesn’t leave me open to being victimized, manipulated, and taken advantage of. I don’t want to live guarded.
Amy Pitt, Psychotherapy, Walnut Creek, CA, USAsays
I engaged an image of “the Goddess” (as I sometimes do when I meditate) allowing her to put her arms around me and hold me in her lap, caressing my face. I received her warmth, feeling safe and loved — and therefore lovable.
Dear Tara, I am so grateful for the opportunity to learn from your teachings. Especially this sharing touched me deeply. However, trying to bring kindness for experiencing “being alone in this world”, “not having achieved anything”; “being useless and not knowing why I am here anyway” – well, I can think and say this to myself but my heart does not respond, thus I become very sad.
My whole life I tried to find IT, the inner peace, the heart-energy which would embrace me to celebrate life. I love all human beings, the earth and the universe – but can’t find it for myself.
Yet, I will go on to complete this task. With Daily Mindfulness and these courses with you as well.
Love, Angelika
Challenge is. There’s an outside that confirms my my shortcomings. I might amplify or delude myself. But clearly evidence is there, By anyone’s standards Not a good person. People that know me, say at times I am are great person to be around Why don’t you be that person I see sometimes. I never hold this state and they distance themselves from me. Then I think screw you, I can get by being alone:
I felt fear for my fathers wellbeing. I tried to bring kindness by putting my hand on my heart and suddenly I felt how tired I was. So I think I was at least more present…
My feelings of hurt a disappointment by my husband of his dismissive attitude my anger didn’t leave me. But I did offer them up to the universe a d G- d. Asking to replace them w love acceptance and self compassion. It’s been tough suffering w these issues and feelings way before Covid but they’ve became much more intense sad and painful. All I can do is work and focus on me because he’s checked out after 31 years. Today is our anniversary. Sweet. Still hurts like hell but I’ve got to figure out how to move the hell on.
I’m taking your beginners mindfulness meditation right now and this practice is really helpful. It is difficult to get with being okay with what’s going on. But, I have experienced success and that gives me hope. Thank you so much!
Thank you for this message. I wish there was a way to broadcast it to the entire world.
I felt overwhelming joy. Joy for the path to bring peace to myself and in doing so, helps spread peace to others. This message is something I’ve been working on the last few years, and now I am just beginning to really understand the whole picture, thus the pure, sweet joy feeling. Thank you. Amy
I felt anxiety. Could I do this? What is something really strong came up, like someone who has hurt me so deeply? I don’t feel able to be kind to this experience.
I only felt I wasn’t deserving of any kindness. My actions have brought me to this place of struggles and lack of self-esteem. It was my choices that have lead me to have to work so hard a providing my basic needs. I deserve to struggle, this is what I get for acting and living in the way that I have. Again, I deserve NO kindness or love. Suffer the consequences, expect no understanding from others or help. It is my mess to clean up and I am on my own.
Such a harsh stance and I still speak to myself like this.
The feelings that arose were feelings of inadequacy and failure. Bringing kindness into the mix was freeing. Usually my response to those feelings is marshaling evidence to reinforce the feelings. This time, bringing kindness was a whole new sensation. What a difference!
Placing kindness changed the tone for me. I’m struggling with a friend of 25 yrs. we haven’t been able to resolve our issues. She called me awful names and said she felt justified in it. A very deep hurt. Placing kindness and compassion allowed me to feel the hurt in my heart and not my stomach.
finding and working with the sense of being part of something beautiful: divine presence. Inside and outside of my body, nature, life’s mysteries…both negative and positive.
I had much the same response as you shared in your camping story. I felt sad that I did not have that relationship as a “best friend” with myself. When I was able to do the exercise and find those soft and vulnerable places and treat my own pain with kindness and compassion there was almost a shift inside of , “oh…it is going to be ok.” I am not alone – I have myself and that is good.
Thank you, Tara. Just yesterday during meditation with Jack Kornfield, he asked what do we have within us to give to the world. I realized right away that my answer was Kindness. I also realize that I needed to direct some of that Kindness toward myself.
I felt like something is caught in my throat. I realize I need to speak my truth with love and kindness. I fear I would speak from a defensive stance and that would make it difficult to hear. Gratitude and peace!
I was wondering if I am truly living the life I want to live or trying to (very successfully) live up to others expectations and impress them. I am more and more accepting everything about my being and ready to embrace the negative thoughts, feelings and sensations that come up every now and then. Yesterday I was truly grateful to be able to release and weep about some recent challenges in child’s pose feeling very refreshed and cleansed after.
Also reading radical acceptance right now. Listening to her and Jack for years now <3
Feeling at ease, after all the confusion during my younger years, I recognize I needed to grow up trusting myself more
I felt calmer and the happy – it felt nice to pause and be kind to myself. Like I was really listening to myself.
Have been practicing RAIN for some time and when I acknowledge what is happening, accept without judgment and with kindness, it is a relief. There is peace. Thanks Tara
Felt strong sense of sadness and emotion deep inside
Thank you Tara for sharing about yourself & your journey. I am struggling with my aging body, the aches & pains of ordinary arthritis. I have tried to accept my limitations without judgment. I value listening to your voice so much. You know what’s weird, I connect with your teaching much easier than I do with other “wise men” of our age. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
Nancy
First, I’ve been doing your meditations longer ones almost or about 20 min daily. It is making a shift. But I still struggle with anxiety, self doubt, worry and fear and not enjoying the beautiful life I have. This is generational and baked into my DNA. Today when i brought kindness i was able to say to myself, it’s OK sweetheart if you don’t accomplish a lot today, and let yourself feel sad on this rainy day surrounded by your dogs. I’m going to meditate now as I haven’t yet today and that also helps me make this shift. I think the meditation on it in this video wasn’t enough of the medicine. Lovely talk. Kind of a nice short version of what I’m hearing in your meditations and talks on your podcast. Thanks so much. You have really changed my life and the life of my husband.
I felt warmth and love. But in this moment it was easy because I was generally in a good mood. But usually bringing kindness to my experiences almost always goes hand in hand with a sense of relief and homecoming.
Thank you for the video and the questions Tara. I have been feeling angry a lot lately, and am trying to understand why. During the video, I brought kindness to my feelings as I would an angry patient (I’m a nurse) and looked at myself through my nursing eyes. I felt wounded, I saw an angry, pouting little girl. I’m going to try to understand her more and be more patient with her. It was a feeling of “I’m going to take better care of her.”
Softness and relief
Softens my attitude, feels a lot better, allows me to tend and befriend, I become softer to people who are causing me stress
Love your soft voice. Feeling a sense of softening when caring for myself and the inner child.
It softened straight away. I felt some sense of space and relief ?
A feeling of warmth despite all my self doubts. Thank you for your teachings. I practice with RAIN on your audiobook every other day.
I like how easy the 2 steps were. They had a very calming effect on me.
I love a much younger lady and I had no trouble bringing kindness to what I was experiencing. My only fear is that she wont reciprocate the feeling.
A very good friend of mine has been struggling with herself for years and still is because she cannot forgive herself that she cannot love her elder sisters. She always remembers them not having treated her as they should. They were already adult when she was born and she did not feel enough respect from them. And, worst, they did not respect her rights when their parents died, so that she feels cheated by them re. the family heritage. – But her problem, as she put it is that she feels guilty of not loving them as she should do as a good sister and as she feels that this would be normal. This lady is 47 now and not married. And she thinks that her toxic relationship to her sisters – who live far away in another European country and whom she does not meet – prevented her to have a husband and a family of her own so far. She feels blocked by her own feeling guilty of not loving them as she thinks should be normal. She had psychotherapy and she told me her story several times – so far I could not find the right tender words for her. She does not want to hear anything like MSC, she thinks that does not go deep enough for her feeling of guilt and shame. So, dear Tara, please help. Thank you for all your loving advice, Edit from Austria
There was some ambivalence-can accept kindness but ?-Though a softening too.
Thank you ,Tara
I found that in general and in most, though not all specifics, I like myself. But I know I can be defensive when criticized and it has a reactive quality to it. I would really like an alternative to that defensive reactivity that doesn’t leave me open to being victimized, manipulated, and taken advantage of. I don’t want to live guarded.
When I tried t bring kidness to the feeling I was experiencing I felt relief.
I engaged an image of “the Goddess” (as I sometimes do when I meditate) allowing her to put her arms around me and hold me in her lap, caressing my face. I received her warmth, feeling safe and loved — and therefore lovable.
Dear Tara, I am so grateful for the opportunity to learn from your teachings. Especially this sharing touched me deeply. However, trying to bring kindness for experiencing “being alone in this world”, “not having achieved anything”; “being useless and not knowing why I am here anyway” – well, I can think and say this to myself but my heart does not respond, thus I become very sad.
My whole life I tried to find IT, the inner peace, the heart-energy which would embrace me to celebrate life. I love all human beings, the earth and the universe – but can’t find it for myself.
Yet, I will go on to complete this task. With Daily Mindfulness and these courses with you as well.
Love, Angelika
Challenge is. There’s an outside that confirms my my shortcomings. I might amplify or delude myself. But clearly evidence is there, By anyone’s standards Not a good person. People that know me, say at times I am are great person to be around Why don’t you be that person I see sometimes. I never hold this state and they distance themselves from me. Then I think screw you, I can get by being alone:
what’s happening: I am going through divorce and I felt grief and I felt rejected
Can I live with this with compassion: I felt quite quickly relieved
I feel more connected in a loving way to myself, I feel like at the end everything will be ok. ??
I felt fear for my fathers wellbeing. I tried to bring kindness by putting my hand on my heart and suddenly I felt how tired I was. So I think I was at least more present…
However hard I tried, there was always the inner dialogue that was evidencing me not being a good person.
Kindness seemed to banish the scary feelings. It was easier to live with those feeling when I brought kindness to them. Thank you!
My feelings of hurt a disappointment by my husband of his dismissive attitude my anger didn’t leave me. But I did offer them up to the universe a d G- d. Asking to replace them w love acceptance and self compassion. It’s been tough suffering w these issues and feelings way before Covid but they’ve became much more intense sad and painful. All I can do is work and focus on me because he’s checked out after 31 years. Today is our anniversary. Sweet. Still hurts like hell but I’ve got to figure out how to move the hell on.
Very hopeful and interesting and always Tara is calming. Thank-you
I’m taking your beginners mindfulness meditation right now and this practice is really helpful. It is difficult to get with being okay with what’s going on. But, I have experienced success and that gives me hope. Thank you so much!
Be aware of kindness to others and to yourself. I really enjoyed the video.
I softened myself.
Thank you for this message. I wish there was a way to broadcast it to the entire world.
I felt overwhelming joy. Joy for the path to bring peace to myself and in doing so, helps spread peace to others. This message is something I’ve been working on the last few years, and now I am just beginning to really understand the whole picture, thus the pure, sweet joy feeling. Thank you. Amy
I felt anxiety. Could I do this? What is something really strong came up, like someone who has hurt me so deeply? I don’t feel able to be kind to this experience.
I only felt I wasn’t deserving of any kindness. My actions have brought me to this place of struggles and lack of self-esteem. It was my choices that have lead me to have to work so hard a providing my basic needs. I deserve to struggle, this is what I get for acting and living in the way that I have. Again, I deserve NO kindness or love. Suffer the consequences, expect no understanding from others or help. It is my mess to clean up and I am on my own.
Such a harsh stance and I still speak to myself like this.
The feelings that arose were feelings of inadequacy and failure. Bringing kindness into the mix was freeing. Usually my response to those feelings is marshaling evidence to reinforce the feelings. This time, bringing kindness was a whole new sensation. What a difference!
Placing kindness changed the tone for me. I’m struggling with a friend of 25 yrs. we haven’t been able to resolve our issues. She called me awful names and said she felt justified in it. A very deep hurt. Placing kindness and compassion allowed me to feel the hurt in my heart and not my stomach.
Thank you?
I feel a grate sense of peace. Thank you.
A quiet softening, awareness of my physical response with kinder & compassionate attention.
Soft tears welled up in my eyes. Thank you.
I softened internally. Felt a bit lighter. Namaste and Thank you.
I was reminded that self-compassion and self-kindness don’t necessarily come easily for me, but they are my “birthright”, as for all of us . . .
Wonderful.
Relief. Lightening of my spirit. Tara, thank you.
finding and working with the sense of being part of something beautiful: divine presence. Inside and outside of my body, nature, life’s mysteries…both negative and positive.
I work as a movement artist and teacher
I had much the same response as you shared in your camping story. I felt sad that I did not have that relationship as a “best friend” with myself. When I was able to do the exercise and find those soft and vulnerable places and treat my own pain with kindness and compassion there was almost a shift inside of , “oh…it is going to be ok.” I am not alone – I have myself and that is good.
Thank you, Tara. Just yesterday during meditation with Jack Kornfield, he asked what do we have within us to give to the world. I realized right away that my answer was Kindness. I also realize that I needed to direct some of that Kindness toward myself.
When I brought self compassion and kindness to this place where I feel self deficiency, I felt acceptance, an uplifting of energy, hopefulness.
I felt like something is caught in my throat. I realize I need to speak my truth with love and kindness. I fear I would speak from a defensive stance and that would make it difficult to hear. Gratitude and peace!