Natalia Nebel, Another Field, Chicago, IL, USAsays
I’d have more positive energy and be less afraid of many things, since I’d transfer the energy that I spend shoring myself up from harsh self judgement to self compassion, and open up to others and the world.
I recognized I felt the feeling I was feeling and held a belief I should not have this feeling. I guess I was blowing it off and then mad at the other for making me feel it!
Thanks so much Tara. These 3 videos were wonderful. I don’t have much time as a grandmother to a 2 year old and her twin sisters recently home from the NICU. Your videos were concise, personally relevant, and offered concrete steps to take.
Perhaps I can release the self criticism, self doubt, and judgement.
I thought of my teenage son who hurt his little brother pretty badly. I was so angry, returning tired from work, to that. i did the practice and now i want to go give him a hug and tell him what I’m afraid of about his love for us lately. Hes 14 and has been pretty retreated and cold. I just want to sit with him and let him feel my love and acceptance. Thank you!
Dorothy Stern-kucha, Social Work, Depoe Bay, OR, USAsays
I would be more available for closer connections and deeper appreciation for what we all carry with us and how it can prevent us from compassion and understanding. My heart would be open and able to love with less fear.
I appreciate you so very much, Tara! I have freed myself through your teachings and example. Namaste and thank you!
I will most certainly be signing up for the full course on unworthiness, self-judgement and shifting out of blame. Tara’s work recently came into my radar and the timing is perfect as I navigate feelings in all of the above in my personal therapy. And when the work is done here, my aspiration is to share your wealth of knowlege with my clients. Thank you for sharing your gift of knowing with us all.
To answer this question honestly? I don’t know. But I am really eager to find out as my chronic blame and anxiousness has kept me back from experiencing the full intimacy I always longed for.
V interesting how strong feelings can shift so quickly,we’re all like frightened vulnerable children with no clue … thanks for your guidance Tara the world (&me) needs you!
Thank you for the reminder that we need to think of things from the other person’s perspective and put ourselves in their shoes, but also for the statement you made that this is not an appropriate tool to use when you are in the middle of a bad situation.
This was a hard one, the hardest of the 3, to grab on to and stay with in my thoughts. I need to move those things out of the way so that I may be more compassionate to others in serving at this time.
It was so powerful to use my name when offering myself compassion. I also noticed that there would be more space and time to really connect with others if energy was not being used in judgment or blame.
Had me in tears thinking about hurt caused to me and about the individuals own trap. I now feel more compassionate towards them and others in general. You never know what others are dealing with.
Lori Jo Jamieson, Other, Phillipsburg, NJ, USAsays
Re: U-Turn Practice…Several situations and people came to mind. I switched to the second one, again, involving my mom. Backing up from the “story” of what happened and u-turning to how I felt was a first for me! Such a simple thing to do, why didn’t I do it before? I have often thought about why my mom acted the way she did, only this time I offered both of us compassion and kindness. Thank you.
Thank you. It was very insightful. I will use the techniques for myself and offer it to my clients. I think the U-turn is a great way to give yourself an opportunity to forgive and heal. Sharing your wisdom is greatly appreciated. Thank you.
Miranda Wang, Counseling, Philadelphia, PA, USAsays
I really like the metaphor of the dog’s leg being trapped in the forest. It helped me to shift perspective to see the other person’s vulnerabilities and also facilitate compassion for myself!
Wow, the amount of energy that would be freed up for compassion, creativity and love when chronic blame is radically transformed into beauty towards the human race, of whom I am one with. Having left a profession after betrayal and being used for others’ benefits, this is such a welcome place to U-turn and find tenderness for myself in the midst of that betrayal. Compassion for the Betrayer was not new for me as I had previously seen her “trapped leg.” Interesting however, forgiveness alone did not allow for me to be okay with me inadequacy to stop the betrayal in the first place! This process is a beginning for opening that space within my heart.
I think I would feel free and then better. Iwoulg free myself from my inner prison and that would feel grand!!!
Thank you so much Tara for this series of videos, I have loved it❤️
I would be at peace. I would be able to let go of this deep resentment.
I love that you mentioned how these two practices might not be appropriate for certain people, like those that are facing larger, systemic oppression. I thought that was so important to point out. Thank you for sharing this with us, Tara.
Thank you Tara for your wise and kind teachings. Makes so much sense .
really appreciate the practice and reminder to open my heart, soften and see with fresh eyes. Great story! I am more calm after listening to you.
Thank you so much. The deep wisdom and simplicity of these practices is so compassionate! all three of these videos have given me so much, for myself and for my clients. If I could let go of judgement and chronic blame (I’m slowly getting there!) I would be a vehicle through which vitality, humour, wisdom and generosity to share my essential gifts can flow; and for my clients – well they would continue to be deepening their flow of being their beautiful rich alive selves. I am committed to sharing these tools. A deep bow of gratitude to you all for bringing these to us.
Who would I be without self blame?
I’d be kinder, towards myself and others. I would be able to grieve the loss of people I loved but let down, and find forgiveness in my heart. I would be a happier, freer person.
I am In Tara’s Mindfulness daily practice and I have also taken several sangha with her and with Jack.
I signed up for this 3 part series to have more opportunities to meditate with Tara and hopefully be able to share with others who however as they are new to mindfulness might not be willing to put their name and address onto the public domain
I’m just not there. I can’t let go of the rage. When my mom was dying 16 years ago, I turned off the rage against her to care for her. She told me and my three sisters that she loved us. This was some thing I had never heard from her lips, nor had my oldest sister who was 12 years older than I. I’m still living with abuse today. I did work to being kind to myself, but that’s as far as I get. I keep coming back to realizing I never really forgive myself.
Very powerful and concisely presented. I love calling it the U turn and turning the attention toward comforting self, I believe that is where alot of the healing happens from shame and trauma.
Love the U turn metaphor to bring ourselves out of blaming the other and coming back to ourselves for compassion about what we are experiencing in that situation. Thank you Tara. As always, your wisdom and clarity is much appreciated.
If I could learn to let go, I would be limitless, and stop holding myself back from taking pleasure in living again. I have carried so much for so long that every day is a struggle
I would be me! Thank you. Always knew I was a compassionate person, but I didn’t know how much I don’t apply that to myself. It’s ok to feel my feelings. Thank you again. ?
Very powerful. What I find interesting is the amount of armor built up over the years with respect to certain situations and that when doing the u-turn it’s not just my own thoughts, feelings and memories it’s also remembering what others have shared with me about their thoughts on these situations. Thank-you!
I’d have more positive energy and be less afraid of many things, since I’d transfer the energy that I spend shoring myself up from harsh self judgement to self compassion, and open up to others and the world.
I recognized I felt the feeling I was feeling and held a belief I should not have this feeling. I guess I was blowing it off and then mad at the other for making me feel it!
Thanks so much Tara. These 3 videos were wonderful. I don’t have much time as a grandmother to a 2 year old and her twin sisters recently home from the NICU. Your videos were concise, personally relevant, and offered concrete steps to take.
Perhaps I can release the self criticism, self doubt, and judgement.
I thought of my teenage son who hurt his little brother pretty badly. I was so angry, returning tired from work, to that. i did the practice and now i want to go give him a hug and tell him what I’m afraid of about his love for us lately. Hes 14 and has been pretty retreated and cold. I just want to sit with him and let him feel my love and acceptance. Thank you!
I would be more available for closer connections and deeper appreciation for what we all carry with us and how it can prevent us from compassion and understanding. My heart would be open and able to love with less fear.
I appreciate you so very much, Tara! I have freed myself through your teachings and example. Namaste and thank you!
I will most certainly be signing up for the full course on unworthiness, self-judgement and shifting out of blame. Tara’s work recently came into my radar and the timing is perfect as I navigate feelings in all of the above in my personal therapy. And when the work is done here, my aspiration is to share your wealth of knowlege with my clients. Thank you for sharing your gift of knowing with us all.
To answer this question honestly? I don’t know. But I am really eager to find out as my chronic blame and anxiousness has kept me back from experiencing the full intimacy I always longed for.
Thank you for this and found the U turn way of thinking helpful. Much appreciated.
Calmer, kinder, and connected
I would be who I want to be.
At peace.Have more energy to use positively.
V interesting how strong feelings can shift so quickly,we’re all like frightened vulnerable children with no clue … thanks for your guidance Tara the world (&me) needs you!
Healing through the process……. I closed my eyes & pictured the ‘ U’ turn …
I liked the feeling of acceptance experienced after making the u-turn.
Very helpful
Thank you for the reminder that we need to think of things from the other person’s perspective and put ourselves in their shoes, but also for the statement you made that this is not an appropriate tool to use when you are in the middle of a bad situation.
Thank you so much for this mini-course.
This was a hard one, the hardest of the 3, to grab on to and stay with in my thoughts. I need to move those things out of the way so that I may be more compassionate to others in serving at this time.
It was so powerful to use my name when offering myself compassion. I also noticed that there would be more space and time to really connect with others if energy was not being used in judgment or blame.
Had me in tears thinking about hurt caused to me and about the individuals own trap. I now feel more compassionate towards them and others in general. You never know what others are dealing with.
I love the leg in a trap metaphor? Very helpful!
Living not existing. Accepting self and others with compassion. Accepting what is. Becoming more open to what can be:-)
Re: U-Turn Practice…Several situations and people came to mind. I switched to the second one, again, involving my mom. Backing up from the “story” of what happened and u-turning to how I felt was a first for me! Such a simple thing to do, why didn’t I do it before? I have often thought about why my mom acted the way she did, only this time I offered both of us compassion and kindness. Thank you.
Thank you. It was very insightful. I will use the techniques for myself and offer it to my clients. I think the U-turn is a great way to give yourself an opportunity to forgive and heal. Sharing your wisdom is greatly appreciated. Thank you.
I really like the metaphor of the dog’s leg being trapped in the forest. It helped me to shift perspective to see the other person’s vulnerabilities and also facilitate compassion for myself!
Wow, the amount of energy that would be freed up for compassion, creativity and love when chronic blame is radically transformed into beauty towards the human race, of whom I am one with. Having left a profession after betrayal and being used for others’ benefits, this is such a welcome place to U-turn and find tenderness for myself in the midst of that betrayal. Compassion for the Betrayer was not new for me as I had previously seen her “trapped leg.” Interesting however, forgiveness alone did not allow for me to be okay with me inadequacy to stop the betrayal in the first place! This process is a beginning for opening that space within my heart.
I think I would feel free and then better. Iwoulg free myself from my inner prison and that would feel grand!!!
Thank you so much Tara for this series of videos, I have loved it❤️
I would be at peace. I would be able to let go of this deep resentment.
I love that you mentioned how these two practices might not be appropriate for certain people, like those that are facing larger, systemic oppression. I thought that was so important to point out. Thank you for sharing this with us, Tara.
These are such words of wisdom and love.
Thank you, Tara.
As a therapist, this process can help clients to feel themselves and soften towards self compassion and compassion towards others.
As a human, it is the same for me. It is part of my journey and also my responsibility to my global community to connect and support compassion
Thank you so much for this awesome series! I look forward to using these techniques with my clients.
Thank you Tara for your wise and kind teachings. Makes so much sense .
really appreciate the practice and reminder to open my heart, soften and see with fresh eyes. Great story! I am more calm after listening to you.
The 3 video’s were very interesting and helpful to start practicing (again) to stop blaming myself and having more compassion.
Thank you.
Thank you so much. The deep wisdom and simplicity of these practices is so compassionate! all three of these videos have given me so much, for myself and for my clients. If I could let go of judgement and chronic blame (I’m slowly getting there!) I would be a vehicle through which vitality, humour, wisdom and generosity to share my essential gifts can flow; and for my clients – well they would continue to be deepening their flow of being their beautiful rich alive selves. I am committed to sharing these tools. A deep bow of gratitude to you all for bringing these to us.
Good stuff, especially the “leg in a trap” metaphor
Who would I be without self blame?
I’d be kinder, towards myself and others. I would be able to grieve the loss of people I loved but let down, and find forgiveness in my heart. I would be a happier, freer person.
I am In Tara’s Mindfulness daily practice and I have also taken several sangha with her and with Jack.
I signed up for this 3 part series to have more opportunities to meditate with Tara and hopefully be able to share with others who however as they are new to mindfulness might not be willing to put their name and address onto the public domain
I’m just not there. I can’t let go of the rage. When my mom was dying 16 years ago, I turned off the rage against her to care for her. She told me and my three sisters that she loved us. This was some thing I had never heard from her lips, nor had my oldest sister who was 12 years older than I. I’m still living with abuse today. I did work to being kind to myself, but that’s as far as I get. I keep coming back to realizing I never really forgive myself.
This was the best one. I am one to not face that vulnerability…to actively turn from it. I am learning. Thank you.
Very powerful and concisely presented. I love calling it the U turn and turning the attention toward comforting self, I believe that is where alot of the healing happens from shame and trauma.
Love the U turn metaphor to bring ourselves out of blaming the other and coming back to ourselves for compassion about what we are experiencing in that situation. Thank you Tara. As always, your wisdom and clarity is much appreciated.
I would be happier
I feel free, at peace, empowered and happy.
I would feel more compassion to free my own sense of unworthiness & shame
Thank you so much Tara. Your good heart is shining through and healing. I would love to be able to listen again and again to your videos.
I could be free.
I would feel more confident.
If I could learn to let go, I would be limitless, and stop holding myself back from taking pleasure in living again. I have carried so much for so long that every day is a struggle
I would be me! Thank you. Always knew I was a compassionate person, but I didn’t know how much I don’t apply that to myself. It’s ok to feel my feelings. Thank you again. ?
Very powerful. What I find interesting is the amount of armor built up over the years with respect to certain situations and that when doing the u-turn it’s not just my own thoughts, feelings and memories it’s also remembering what others have shared with me about their thoughts on these situations. Thank-you!
practising the u-turn gives a glimpse into a vast expanse of possibility