Thank you Tara your teachings very much resonate with me. It is so hopeful that it is never too late to learn how to love oneself and so open the door to loving others.
Dearest Tara ~
Sighing a million sighs of gratitude for you, your gift, your gentle guidance that has led me to me. The last thirty years I have lived with gas lighting and wasn’t aware until four years ago that I had become so eroded from my self with such despair of unworthiness, I nearly ended my life. Lucky for me I am Scottish/Irish descent and was both too stubborn to let that happen and I simply love life so very much, I knew there had to be a way back to the light. I began the practice of meditation through the Calm app. It was there I was introduced to you and your teachings of Radical Self Compassion. The awakening to presence and loving one self fully and unconditionally has added so much life to my life. The more I practice presence and being, the more the layers of the complexities of what I had been experiencing began to peel away. Recently, I felt an amazing softening and realized what I was feeling was forgiveness. Forgiveness towards myself and towards my partner. The freedom is immense. I suppose somewhere in there, from your teachings, I was already doing the u-turn. So much comes to light when we are still in our being, breathing into each breath of life. There is so much I would like to share, to say, to express how much of a difference your teachings have made in my life. I love me now and that allows me to love outwardly more than I could possibly ever imagine. Purely. I somehow know that you will accept that I truly love you and thank you, sincerely.
Blessings and warmth to you always …
Aeleen
xxo
Who would I be? Not sure. But I have a sense of how I’d feel—lighter, more open, curious, willing to engage. And if that’s true, I might find out who I really am when free of the constraints of endless self-criticism and blame. I don’t know that person yet, but I think she’d be happier, more compassionate to herself and others, less bent on protecting herself, on conforming to received notions of what she should be and do. She might even begin to learn what she really wants, who she was meant to be. Someone mentions “numbing behaviors” and that resonates so strongly with me. To be free of those mindless compulsions would be life changing. Thank you for this Tara. It’s so moving and helpful.
I’ve experienced a lot of emotional pain for years because a sister, who I deeply love and we used to be very close, has shut me out of her life. My focus has always been on how her actions are hurting me. Your practice has begun the shift I’ve been wanting — but didn’t know where to find. I now feel a greater heart opening as I allow in more self-compassion and let go of blaming my sister. I see the possibility of experiencing greater freedom inside for both of us.
Tara, Thank you for your teachings. What I found most helpful was a comment that you made a couple of times–reminding ourselves that “It’s OK to feel this.” It’s only when I can give myself that freedom, either by explicitly reminding myself or by doing it instinctively, that I really know what it feels like to forgive myself. And when I do, I feel much more able to deal with whatever I’m feeling. I’m able to muster more of my abilities and act in my own best interests, rather than resorting to blame or self-criticism.
Frances Michener, Another Field, San Rafael, CA, USAsays
Your question has touched me deeply. My first thought is that I would not be myself. But my second thought is that I would be larger, with a bigger heart. I want to explore this further.
joan Doherty, Marriage/Family Therapy, Bethlehem, PA, USAsays
I am feeling so blessed by the ideas of self-compassion and your guidance in how when I connect with my own vulnerability I can then make an effort to see the vulnerability in others and in this way, heal deep wounds.
Rebecca Rodriguez, Marriage/Family Therapy, Fullerton, CA, USAsays
Thank you for these 3 mini trainings. They have been so relevant and insightful. I have appreciated the simple interventions for deeper awareness and cultivating unconditional acceptance and compassion to ourselves and others. It was also helpful to have the guidance, for you to walk us through a personal experience of opening our heart space and making a shift from blame/resentment to compassion. You doing that shows that you are promoting in such an authentic way that we, as therapists, take care of ourselves and genuinely experience this deeper healing towards ourselves so that we can authentically offer it to our clients, and those around us. Thank you for these insights and tools!
Thank you Tara for offering such a refreshing option to deal with our suffering. I felt more compassionate towards the person I imagined in the exercise you offered. And I felt the benefit of that compassion for myself afterwards. Beautiful. Thank you again.
I was moved by the exercise i had a hard time finding compassion for my father because he was so harsh towards me. I can think about all he had to go through in his life but I would have thought that having a child will bring him closer to love rather than selfishness. Thank you for your wisdom and care
B.B. Berg, Another Field, Desert Hot Springs , CA, USAsays
Thank you.
In complete alignment with what I am already in the process of doing. I consider encountering this an answer to my prayer.
With gratitude
Yours
B.B.
I tried the U-turn and looking to see the vulnerability underneath my feelings regarding a small situation that occurred today– and then the likely vulnerability in other person. I thought it would help, but didn’t expect it to be as effective or moving as it turned out to be. Not only an increased ability to extend kindness and compassion toward myself and the other person– but also a feeling of spacious peacefulness. Learning to respond in that way much more regularly, would enable me to live more kindly in all sorts of daily life situations and varieties of relationships.
If i could achieve a state of less blame and judgment i can only imagine a continuation of softer moments leading to minutes and maybe hours or days in a better state of being.
Thank you Tara. I’m looking forward to hearing more about the course.
Namaste
I would be freer.
This was a very clear, well spoken mini training thank you so much! These were easy enough for me to recall quickly I loved your metaphors & simple solution steps.
Releasing myself from judgment & blame would make me a more relaxed, self-loving woman. I would no longer feel the need to hide behind perfectionism to feel ‘safe’ from being hurt by others. I would be happier, more self-confident & content with my life.
Lots of emotion, learning to accept the helplessness of a situation, free of resentment and fear of the loss of contact.
Truly, the world might totally transform if all beings learned this practice and actively used it. Love would abound. Barriers would start to unravel, under the influence…..
Is there any way to save the videos? I want to share them with my counselor, and watch them over and over. This series helped me see things from a brand new perspective. Thank you for posting them.
Thank you, Tara for your gentle but powerful teachings.
I have had many decades of a painful relationship w a sister 6 years younger( she could be physically abusive and very mean spirited)We both come from a very joyless and dysfunctional background . I chose early on to get into therapy ( which my whole family disdained and thought of as weak) After many years of healing , I graduated with an MSW and loved every bit of the work . I’ve been a practicing Buddhist for 8 years now , which has been richer and deeper and more healing on every level… every day.
I finally can hold my sister in deep compassion for what she may have experienced growing up, and compassion for her angry and highly critical persona . But she has chosen to live this way and
it is an energy I chose not to be around very often.
Perhaps , as you mentioned, due to much trauma , it is still best to take very small steps.
As I thought about who I would be without judgment and blame, I felt the chronic tightness in my left shoulder start to dissipate. I actually smiled to myself and thought how I could be my true self: funny, a kid at heart, kind and no longer scared all the time. I was amazed that in such a short amount of time, I felt this change in myself both physically and emotionally. Thank you for helping me start this journey. Sending love and hugs! ( ) (that is a hug)
while I’ve practiced looking for the “leg in the trap” of offending parties, I still struggle with the act of granting myself compassion
A better wife & partner
Thank you Tara your teachings very much resonate with me. It is so hopeful that it is never too late to learn how to love oneself and so open the door to loving others.
I felt relaxed and I believe that I would have a more freer life happier life.
Thank you
More carefree, compassionate and open-hearted.
Thank you, was able to access some hurt and actually sigh and release.
I’d be a happier, more giving person. I’d enjoy life more.
Dearest Tara ~
Sighing a million sighs of gratitude for you, your gift, your gentle guidance that has led me to me. The last thirty years I have lived with gas lighting and wasn’t aware until four years ago that I had become so eroded from my self with such despair of unworthiness, I nearly ended my life. Lucky for me I am Scottish/Irish descent and was both too stubborn to let that happen and I simply love life so very much, I knew there had to be a way back to the light. I began the practice of meditation through the Calm app. It was there I was introduced to you and your teachings of Radical Self Compassion. The awakening to presence and loving one self fully and unconditionally has added so much life to my life. The more I practice presence and being, the more the layers of the complexities of what I had been experiencing began to peel away. Recently, I felt an amazing softening and realized what I was feeling was forgiveness. Forgiveness towards myself and towards my partner. The freedom is immense. I suppose somewhere in there, from your teachings, I was already doing the u-turn. So much comes to light when we are still in our being, breathing into each breath of life. There is so much I would like to share, to say, to express how much of a difference your teachings have made in my life. I love me now and that allows me to love outwardly more than I could possibly ever imagine. Purely. I somehow know that you will accept that I truly love you and thank you, sincerely.
Blessings and warmth to you always …
Aeleen
xxo
I would be more open to myself and others.
More settled and grounded in my own being.
Who would I be? Not sure. But I have a sense of how I’d feel—lighter, more open, curious, willing to engage. And if that’s true, I might find out who I really am when free of the constraints of endless self-criticism and blame. I don’t know that person yet, but I think she’d be happier, more compassionate to herself and others, less bent on protecting herself, on conforming to received notions of what she should be and do. She might even begin to learn what she really wants, who she was meant to be. Someone mentions “numbing behaviors” and that resonates so strongly with me. To be free of those mindless compulsions would be life changing. Thank you for this Tara. It’s so moving and helpful.
This exercise was both simple and profound and has a lot of inner truth is it.
Thank you for your work on this.
So helpful . Thanks
FBW
It’s nice to reflect inwards
When I turned to my own pain/suffering and met it with compassion, it felt so incredibly tender, yet okay. No longer negative.
Thank you very much for sharing these videos…. I would feel so light taking off the heavy weight of self-judgment and blaming.
I’ve experienced a lot of emotional pain for years because a sister, who I deeply love and we used to be very close, has shut me out of her life. My focus has always been on how her actions are hurting me. Your practice has begun the shift I’ve been wanting — but didn’t know where to find. I now feel a greater heart opening as I allow in more self-compassion and let go of blaming my sister. I see the possibility of experiencing greater freedom inside for both of us.
Tara, Thank you for your teachings. What I found most helpful was a comment that you made a couple of times–reminding ourselves that “It’s OK to feel this.” It’s only when I can give myself that freedom, either by explicitly reminding myself or by doing it instinctively, that I really know what it feels like to forgive myself. And when I do, I feel much more able to deal with whatever I’m feeling. I’m able to muster more of my abilities and act in my own best interests, rather than resorting to blame or self-criticism.
Helpful, but oh so much work to do!
Who would I be? I would be a happier, friendlier, more accepting less anxious person. Thank you.
I would be my best self, able to experience others and life in all the richness that comes with an open heart and inner peace.
FREE
thank you
I need to understand my father to understand myself. Thank you
Your question has touched me deeply. My first thought is that I would not be myself. But my second thought is that I would be larger, with a bigger heart. I want to explore this further.
Thank you very much it came to me at the right time just in much need for a very closer friend!
I don’t know.
I am feeling so blessed by the ideas of self-compassion and your guidance in how when I connect with my own vulnerability I can then make an effort to see the vulnerability in others and in this way, heal deep wounds.
I long to finally meet me. Thank you so much for all you do. I look forward to learning more about the program. Many blessings!
Looking forward to learning more. Thank you Tara. I felt the compassion melting my heart space.
I would be free to be me. Thank you Tara for all you do, and all you offer so generously. Every time I listen, I feel clarity and spaciousness.
Free to be my true self.
Thank you for these 3 mini trainings. They have been so relevant and insightful. I have appreciated the simple interventions for deeper awareness and cultivating unconditional acceptance and compassion to ourselves and others. It was also helpful to have the guidance, for you to walk us through a personal experience of opening our heart space and making a shift from blame/resentment to compassion. You doing that shows that you are promoting in such an authentic way that we, as therapists, take care of ourselves and genuinely experience this deeper healing towards ourselves so that we can authentically offer it to our clients, and those around us. Thank you for these insights and tools!
Ed – these three concise videos are packed with concrete steps and guidance.
Thank you Tara for offering such a refreshing option to deal with our suffering. I felt more compassionate towards the person I imagined in the exercise you offered. And I felt the benefit of that compassion for myself afterwards. Beautiful. Thank you again.
I was moved by the exercise i had a hard time finding compassion for my father because he was so harsh towards me. I can think about all he had to go through in his life but I would have thought that having a child will bring him closer to love rather than selfishness. Thank you for your wisdom and care
These 3 videos are so very helpful to me and my clients.
I often seek out your wisdom.
Thank you Tara!
Thank you.
In complete alignment with what I am already in the process of doing. I consider encountering this an answer to my prayer.
With gratitude
Yours
B.B.
I tried the U-turn and looking to see the vulnerability underneath my feelings regarding a small situation that occurred today– and then the likely vulnerability in other person. I thought it would help, but didn’t expect it to be as effective or moving as it turned out to be. Not only an increased ability to extend kindness and compassion toward myself and the other person– but also a feeling of spacious peacefulness. Learning to respond in that way much more regularly, would enable me to live more kindly in all sorts of daily life situations and varieties of relationships.
If i could achieve a state of less blame and judgment i can only imagine a continuation of softer moments leading to minutes and maybe hours or days in a better state of being.
Thank you Tara. I’m looking forward to hearing more about the course.
Namaste
I would be freer.
This was a very clear, well spoken mini training thank you so much! These were easy enough for me to recall quickly I loved your metaphors & simple solution steps.
Releasing myself from judgment & blame would make me a more relaxed, self-loving woman. I would no longer feel the need to hide behind perfectionism to feel ‘safe’ from being hurt by others. I would be happier, more self-confident & content with my life.
Thank you for sharing these profound insights
Lots of emotion, learning to accept the helplessness of a situation, free of resentment and fear of the loss of contact.
Truly, the world might totally transform if all beings learned this practice and actively used it. Love would abound. Barriers would start to unravel, under the influence…..
couldn’t do it, too much hurt
Is there any way to save the videos? I want to share them with my counselor, and watch them over and over. This series helped me see things from a brand new perspective. Thank you for posting them.
Thank you, Tara for your gentle but powerful teachings.
I have had many decades of a painful relationship w a sister 6 years younger( she could be physically abusive and very mean spirited)We both come from a very joyless and dysfunctional background . I chose early on to get into therapy ( which my whole family disdained and thought of as weak) After many years of healing , I graduated with an MSW and loved every bit of the work . I’ve been a practicing Buddhist for 8 years now , which has been richer and deeper and more healing on every level… every day.
I finally can hold my sister in deep compassion for what she may have experienced growing up, and compassion for her angry and highly critical persona . But she has chosen to live this way and
it is an energy I chose not to be around very often.
Perhaps , as you mentioned, due to much trauma , it is still best to take very small steps.
As I thought about who I would be without judgment and blame, I felt the chronic tightness in my left shoulder start to dissipate. I actually smiled to myself and thought how I could be my true self: funny, a kid at heart, kind and no longer scared all the time. I was amazed that in such a short amount of time, I felt this change in myself both physically and emotionally. Thank you for helping me start this journey. Sending love and hugs! ( ) (that is a hug)
I would be kinder & less critical of others & myself
Thank you Tara, very clear and practical exercises for myself and my clients. All are liberating from suffering and open our heart.
i have used this idea in my own life as i forgave my sister after 10 years of silence by sending metta, and letting go. We are now best friends!