I would not have to repeat my fathers abusive behaviors toward myself or others. I would have compassion for my inner child. In this crazy division of beliefs that is upon us at this moment in USA frightens me because of the intense feelings the other side triggers in me. Where did my country go? Why so angry at the SUPREME COURT, THEY LIED TO US. Extinction event for animals,6.5 million people have left earth. It’s hard to be hopeful, loving and compassionate. I imagine I would be more at peace, maybe not if we can’t turn our earth back to health.
Listening to your healing ❤️🩹 tool of “ making a U-turn, really touched me deeply today. And BTW, this is not the first time I have heard this from you. As I was preparing to talk to a dear friend tomorrow with feelings of wounded-ness and insecurities and noticing that I would (as gently as possible) be placing “blame “. Once I was able to shift with the U-turn, my heart ❤️ softened deeply realizing I could make better use of our conversation if I became vulnerable, revealing my needs, and asking/inquiring what if any of my needs would be comfortable/ doable in our friendship? And accepting her answer.
I’m hearing a loving invitation to free myself of the self-blaming thoughts that hold me back. I’d like to be open to try. I don’t know if I’m up to it. Of course it’s hard.
Hopefully, I would be free of The Person that I now am! Free from the daily internal conflict which manifests in a problematic personal relationship with The Woman I love, but who I hurt so much. This, in turn, hurt’s me!
I have tried hard to Work with this and whilst there has been some improvement, I still find myself, sliding back into the vicious cycle of Anger & Regret!
It would be so good, to be a different Person!?
Dear Tara
The burden of not being able to forgive more readily would be eased enormously if ‘blame and judgement’ were not the first responders. If I could let go of ‘reacting out of my wound’, an expanded perception would in turn expand the heart’s flow. Anxiousness about one’s connections/sense of belonging, would greatly lessened.
Thank you for the U-turn exercise and the Seeing Vulnerability exercise: their designed purpose provides the way forward to grow muscles and deepen in the area of self compassion: “Doing” is so different to “intellectualising.
I need to forgive my parents. the U-tune has really helped me let go of the blame as well as the stories I’ve been ruminating over the past few years 😳. Thank you so much Tara.
Recall Freud’s Defense Mechanisms. There are hidden pockets of judgement and blame in all of us. I hope to further learn how to be a better human being.
If I could let go of blame and self-judgment, I may be able to sleep better, have improved health, and have peaceful relationships. It would be a blessing.
I’d be free to be happy all day… I’m very aware when blame or judgement pops up in my mind heart thoughts…I understand it and don’t act on it ..Being able to just not go there tho..not feel the conditioned responses would be great.
I have been practicing self-compassion for years, and it continues to help me process and grow. But being a human being I continue to get caught up in my “wounds” and will get stuck with blaming. I always enjoy the compassionate and gentle reminders to perform a U-turn.
I’m realizing these days how much of the time my mind is judging everything around me, people, situations, weather, this or that, as good or bad. If its the latter my mind can give me an almost palpable feeling of “bad” and that can really taint my experience. |As I become more mindful of these thoughts/feelings, I don’t get caught up in them–so I’m a lot more free and available to be present…I’m also more at ease and relaxed since I’m not caught in the web of the negativity. I believe that the more I practice mindfulness, the more relaxed and present I am becoming, and the more I am able to be my true self in the world.
Dear Tara, thanks so much for your continuous loving teaching and presence . You are such a courageous woman and you inspire me!
Free from self-blame, from the belief that somehow I have to suffer & punish myself from failing to become the person I want to be (serene, detached, wise)
I would be a person who could freely connect with people who have diverse political views. I would be someone who is more open and lighthearted. I have been a peaceful person for most of my life… not now. I entangled myself in the political divide… especially on the topic of vaccine mandates and anger over suppression of discourse and access to treatments throughout the pandemic. I’m stuck in the blame game. Blame will never bring back the person that I lost or the family member that is harmed from the vaccine. Thank you so much for offering a way out of this! For the first time, listening to you, I had hope that I can somehow work through this.
Laura Vicars, Counseling, IE says
I’d spend my life connecting with more truth
Susan eggerz, Alexandria, VA, USA says
I would feel relieved of the burden of anger, but I might also feel vulnerable and unable to stand up for myself.
Dee W, Teacher, NH, USA says
I see how helpful it is to recognize when I begin chronic blame and then quickly make the u-turn. Thank you, I find your methods very helpful.
Who would I be?
I’d feel much more free.
I could help others.
Nora Taylor, Psychotherapy, Los Angeles , CA, USA says
Thank you, this was really helpful.
Zonia Canas, Other, Houston, TX, USA says
A joyful person
Margrit Wong, Coach, Takoma Park, MD, USA says
I would be a loving free person who would feel that I have enough and that I am enough and that I want everyone else have enough.
Megan Gray Paterson-Brown, Psychotherapy, CH says
A lot lighter and happier
Mira R, USA says
Your voice was very calming . … letting go of anger and forgiving the other works best for ourselves . Thanks
Deborah J Din, Nursing, Fremont , CA, USA says
I would not have to repeat my fathers abusive behaviors toward myself or others. I would have compassion for my inner child. In this crazy division of beliefs that is upon us at this moment in USA frightens me because of the intense feelings the other side triggers in me. Where did my country go? Why so angry at the SUPREME COURT, THEY LIED TO US. Extinction event for animals,6.5 million people have left earth. It’s hard to be hopeful, loving and compassionate. I imagine I would be more at peace, maybe not if we can’t turn our earth back to health.
ming leong, Other, sugar land, TX, USA says
I would be feeling lighter, more centered and grounded in the present moment.
Karen Ward, Another Field, GB says
Still me but lighter. More me and less bound by stories I’ve picked up along the way.
LOUISE SCOTT, Other, Novato , CA, USA says
Listening to your healing ❤️🩹 tool of “ making a U-turn, really touched me deeply today. And BTW, this is not the first time I have heard this from you. As I was preparing to talk to a dear friend tomorrow with feelings of wounded-ness and insecurities and noticing that I would (as gently as possible) be placing “blame “. Once I was able to shift with the U-turn, my heart ❤️ softened deeply realizing I could make better use of our conversation if I became vulnerable, revealing my needs, and asking/inquiring what if any of my needs would be comfortable/ doable in our friendship? And accepting her answer.
Frances Colahan, Nursing, AU says
This is such a gentle and respectful peaceful practice. Thank you.
Anonymous says
I’m hearing a loving invitation to free myself of the self-blaming thoughts that hold me back. I’d like to be open to try. I don’t know if I’m up to it. Of course it’s hard.
Ruth McMillan, Dallas, TX, USA says
I would learn to love myself and accept who I am.
Kelly Collins, Nursing, Bellingham Wa, WA, USA says
I would be my authentic self, someone with an open heart who would receive and give love freely.
Richard Terry, AU says
Hopefully, I would be free of The Person that I now am! Free from the daily internal conflict which manifests in a problematic personal relationship with The Woman I love, but who I hurt so much. This, in turn, hurt’s me!
I have tried hard to Work with this and whilst there has been some improvement, I still find myself, sliding back into the vicious cycle of Anger & Regret!
It would be so good, to be a different Person!?
Natalie Sok, Teacher, Baltimore , MD, USA says
A much happier person I would be less harsh on myself and especially people I love.
Lindy Peters, Another Field, NZ says
Dear Tara
The burden of not being able to forgive more readily would be eased enormously if ‘blame and judgement’ were not the first responders. If I could let go of ‘reacting out of my wound’, an expanded perception would in turn expand the heart’s flow. Anxiousness about one’s connections/sense of belonging, would greatly lessened.
Thank you for the U-turn exercise and the Seeing Vulnerability exercise: their designed purpose provides the way forward to grow muscles and deepen in the area of self compassion: “Doing” is so different to “intellectualising.
Kindest regards and appreciation
Lindy
Annie Harmon, Coach, Wilmington, DE, USA says
I need to forgive my parents. the U-tune has really helped me let go of the blame as well as the stories I’ve been ruminating over the past few years 😳. Thank you so much Tara.
Patricia Simpson, Counseling, Lee, MA, USA says
Recall Freud’s Defense Mechanisms. There are hidden pockets of judgement and blame in all of us. I hope to further learn how to be a better human being.
Amy Goldbeck, Psychotherapy, IL, USA says
A wise example. Happier myself, and Free of the pattern.
Bonnie Sanchez, Other, Bellevue, NE, USA says
If I could let go of blame and self-judgment, I may be able to sleep better, have improved health, and have peaceful relationships. It would be a blessing.
Fran Swaine, Nutrition, Evanston , IL, USA says
I’d be free to be happy all day… I’m very aware when blame or judgement pops up in my mind heart thoughts…I understand it and don’t act on it ..Being able to just not go there tho..not feel the conditioned responses would be great.
Justin Hersom, Psychotherapy, Austin, TX, USA says
I have been practicing self-compassion for years, and it continues to help me process and grow. But being a human being I continue to get caught up in my “wounds” and will get stuck with blaming. I always enjoy the compassionate and gentle reminders to perform a U-turn.
Stephanie, Nursing, USA says
I’m realizing these days how much of the time my mind is judging everything around me, people, situations, weather, this or that, as good or bad. If its the latter my mind can give me an almost palpable feeling of “bad” and that can really taint my experience. |As I become more mindful of these thoughts/feelings, I don’t get caught up in them–so I’m a lot more free and available to be present…I’m also more at ease and relaxed since I’m not caught in the web of the negativity. I believe that the more I practice mindfulness, the more relaxed and present I am becoming, and the more I am able to be my true self in the world.
Dear Tara, thanks so much for your continuous loving teaching and presence . You are such a courageous woman and you inspire me!
Rosie Barley, GB says
A more relaxed person, more at ease with myself and the world.
NANCY RUSSELL, Other, NEW HOPE, PA, USA says
IT WAS VERY HELPFUL AND TRUE. EASY TO FEEL COMPASSION FOR OTHERS BUT NOT FOR MYSELF
Lana Strukova, Another Field, Houston , TX, USA says
A kinder compassionate person with freedom and more love to myself and others
Robin Correll, Nursing, GARBERVILLE, CA, USA says
more open hearted, not taking everything so seriously, not always getting hooked into the storylines
Candidat Stille Humphreys, Counseling, MC says
Free to live and love
Stacey Branom, Other, Seattle, WA, USA says
I wouldn’t be hurting myself each time I have these thoughts.
Victoria K L Palmer, Another Field, GB says
I’d be more easy going, a calmer Mummy and less reactive.
Zahra Lalani, Occupational Therapy, CA says
I would be at peace with who I am. I would also not be as triggered by what others do. This was a beautiful practice. Thank you
Noemie Wassel, AU says
Free from self-blame, from the belief that somehow I have to suffer & punish myself from failing to become the person I want to be (serene, detached, wise)
James Sullivan, Another Field, USA says
A more comfortable person to be around, and probably a happier person.
R, Other, AU says
Thanks very much- this has been a very helpful – accepting myself as I am is difficult but I can see that its necessary ❤️🙏
Andreas Weigel, Medicine, DE says
A very friendly Person.
Virginie Vandaele, Coach, BE says
I’d feel more free and joyful
Cynthia Wheeler, Clergy, MD, USA says
I’d be immersed in community and love that I am also willing to return.
Des, 55987, MN, USA says
I would be a person who could freely connect with people who have diverse political views. I would be someone who is more open and lighthearted. I have been a peaceful person for most of my life… not now. I entangled myself in the political divide… especially on the topic of vaccine mandates and anger over suppression of discourse and access to treatments throughout the pandemic. I’m stuck in the blame game. Blame will never bring back the person that I lost or the family member that is harmed from the vaccine. Thank you so much for offering a way out of this! For the first time, listening to you, I had hope that I can somehow work through this.
Karen Smith, Teacher, IE says
Free of myself and others
Kapua Tyler, Social Work, kihei, HI, USA says
This method to approach anger is gentle and kind promoting compassion and healing
Thank you
Kapus Tyler, Social Work, kihei, HI, USA says
This method to approach anger is gentle and kind promoting compassion and healing
Thank you
roni mukamal, Medicine, BR says
i felt conected with my dady, it was a great experience to me.
Jocelyn, Nursing, CA says
A happier version of myself
Maria Cleary, Counseling, GB says
Less easy to anger
Barbara Favret Mitchell, Other, Pasadena, CA, USA says
I started crying. I so want to get past the blame and judgement.
Lenka Lemura, Other, CZ says
joyful
Ca, Nursing, GB says
A more peaceful soul