it’s amazing how we just go about our day to day tasks without really spending the time necessary to reflect on our well being until it becomes impossible not to deal with some of the issues.
It astonishes me how cruel I can be towards myself. My mother was an alcoholic and my biological father abusive / sick. My true self is okay, however, I have yet to meet her. The water is murky and full of lies. I need to learn to love myself. They did not show me how. It feels sad.
I feel a lot of pain inside me, and I was crying during the whole Video. But looking at the fotos of the other people who suffers like me, I realized
thats not only me who suffers, and I felt compassion with them and me. Thank you
insightful, soothing, comforting and important words to incorporate into one’s psyche. might need to be listened to daily until they sink in. . .balance is maybe the key:loving oneself necessitates self forgiveness first and foremost. thank u Tara for sharing your hard fought wisdom.
I felt softer in my whole body but most of all it helped me to recognise a vulnerability and be ok with that and release the barriers to self- acceptance.
it feels like a gift you are giving me – us – the world. at the meditation, I became aware of the pain in my bellyvand I could be with it.
afterwards at the insight of how we [ I] judge and how acts are done by human beings like me, came a softening, tenderness and a little tears.
thank you [ and me] for doing this mindfulness.
greetz from the Netherlands
wolf
I felt very sad about my immediate situation. I am not well at the moment. I have been thinking that I brought this on myself. But when I bring compassion to my thoughts I can laugh a little through the tears.
As you let your attention go to the fact that we feel so incapable, I felt saddened and that leaden sensation that comes with my depression. I felt lost. When you asked what’s happening my feelings all tended toward my fear of extinction and erasure, death in other words. I wanted to surrender. When you prompted us to ask, can I be with this?, a that great leaden weight, like what I imagine kryptonite is to superman exerted malign gravity that made it hard to sit with.
I felt pressure on my chest and sadness. Then in the second step being with this with kindness I could feel how this pressure slowly transformed getting softer and my heart felt raw and more open. Thank you
Kristen Dahlstrom, Other, Ellicott City, MD, USAsays
I felt the tightness in my heart center and that critical voice was loud and clear.
I imagine myself comforting me, an arm around my shoulder. Then I only felt sadness.
I realized my heart was hurting physically from deep things and past events, and deep grief that I hate myself for; for the pain I experience from a narcissitic family member. I thought about trying to give care to my suffering, The thought came into my mind that I don’t deserve care, especially with all I should be doing but give up on from depression, anxiety, PTSD and more. I am “supposed” to take care of myself but my mind says I once deserved it, but no more. Yet I adore Tara Brach (and Jack Kornfield), and call them my teachers. I don’t practice mindfulness much anymore, yet Thich Nhat Hanh, Tara, and Jack know truth. I want to learn to care about me, if anyone can help me I believe Tara and Jack and listening to Thay can help me.
first, thank you. your dedication and generosity are deeply appreciated.
It’s so easy to forget to practice this “checking in” via the two wings.. I meditate, read Buddhist teachings near-daily and know to practice RAIN when the decades-old trance of unworthiness kicks in – which can be dozens of times daily.. and I can have days and even weeks of feeling so mindful, present, kind, connected, etc., but I also go thru periods where I kinda give up – i.e., “geeze – do I really need to do this RAIN thing again?” and feel like shit… then I amp up my vigilance and I’m back to where I want to be.. so, weather, right? some days golden, some stormy… and I guess I’ll close by saying, “It’s called a practice for a reason.” you gotta keep at it or it – at least for me – disintegrates.. looking forward to the next installment – again, thank you.
I felt calmer and more content and less anxious. Thanks for your work…I am making my way through the 40 day mindfulness tapes too!
David Brasted Russell Island Qld Australia
It’s hard when you start to bring those questions of yourself and acknowledge that we had constantly talk to ourselves passing judgment. Maybe, because we have internalized the criticisms felt from others or because we have been conditioned by our beliefs and culture to think and feel that way. Perceptions can be deceiving and sometimes they are right. Our internal self assigned ‘values’ are constantly questioning and judging us. I feel that I haven’t practiced self kindness. It feels scary, vulnerable, sad, lonely and depressing.
Bruce Schneider, Chiropractor, New Paltz, NY, USAsays
Thank you Tara. With the practice my body relaxed. I also felt some ease from the grip of a particular self-judgement. I felt sadness at the realization that I can’t fix a long-term relationship that has been supportive in ways and yet frequently distant and sometimes harshly judgmental.
Enrique G Romero Jr, Another Field, El Paso, TX, USAsays
Giving kindness to myself has always been hard for me. For years others have told me that I’m really hard on myself. But while listening to Tara I began to see just how hard I’ve been to my self. I got divorced 34 years ago and have always had a fear to start over. I can see now why. I need to treat myself the way I treat others, with warm hearted kindness.
I noticed feelings of hurt bordering on despair and when I allowed myself to feel these feelings with awareness & curiosity and then added kindness I felt a release and lightness.
I noticed a slight opening when I sat with myself, followed by some strong resistance. I feel disconnected from my body and inner voice. I don’t quite understand if compassion is separate from giving an open form on mindfulness to my body.
Tara’s video comes at a most important time. I’m in the midst of a very recent 13 year breakup and struggling with self blame; Having self compassion to allow myself to grieve is hard but necessary. Thank you for sharing your story.
Penni
I recognised i dont have to impress or rely on others for recognition or acceptance.As everyone is different with different likes, values and ways.
I just have to recognise please and accept myself based on my own likes,values and ways.
so its about accepting this in both myself and others without harsh judgement and having more kindness to both self and others for those differences.
sometimes I need to be stronger and trust my own values and ways rather than always bending to others to please others
It felt like I was touching on something essential inside me; getting at the very core of my suffering. When I asked myself to respond with kindness, I felt like I reacted with my gut rather than all the 101 over thinking ideas I usually came up with. It was something I didn’t want to hear initially but knew deep inside that it was the best way for my true self. I know the path I chose in that moment may give me uncomfortable feelings as I grow, but ultimately I feel unburdened that I am going to do what is good for me.
It felt easy/easier to ask for forgiveness and to forgive myself. I could turn towards myself lovingly and towards those I always had the best intentions for also lovingly and openly. Nothing was in the way and it felt freeing to be honest and understood.
I felt sadness, fear and grief because, like you, I’m harsh with myself. in offering myself kindness I felt relieved and supported 😌. There can be a sadness where I can just be there with this feeling without fear of aloneness and without self judgement. Breathe.
Felt really challenged to go to those feelings, as tho I might fall apart and cry if I faced my fears and self blame.
it’s amazing how we just go about our day to day tasks without really spending the time necessary to reflect on our well being until it becomes impossible not to deal with some of the issues.
Tears of sadness and relief.
Thank you.
It astonishes me how cruel I can be towards myself. My mother was an alcoholic and my biological father abusive / sick. My true self is okay, however, I have yet to meet her. The water is murky and full of lies. I need to learn to love myself. They did not show me how. It feels sad.
It tells me how I infrequently I really feel and define how I’m feeling. Especially defining the feeling, I do not do that.
A soften of pain and grip, acceptance!
I wept
I feel a lot of pain inside me, and I was crying during the whole Video. But looking at the fotos of the other people who suffers like me, I realized
thats not only me who suffers, and I felt compassion with them and me. Thank you
insightful, soothing, comforting and important words to incorporate into one’s psyche. might need to be listened to daily until they sink in. . .balance is maybe the key:loving oneself necessitates self forgiveness first and foremost. thank u Tara for sharing your hard fought wisdom.
I felt softer in my whole body but most of all it helped me to recognise a vulnerability and be ok with that and release the barriers to self- acceptance.
it feels like a gift you are giving me – us – the world. at the meditation, I became aware of the pain in my bellyvand I could be with it.
afterwards at the insight of how we [ I] judge and how acts are done by human beings like me, came a softening, tenderness and a little tears.
thank you [ and me] for doing this mindfulness.
greetz from the Netherlands
wolf
I felt very sad about my immediate situation. I am not well at the moment. I have been thinking that I brought this on myself. But when I bring compassion to my thoughts I can laugh a little through the tears.
i felt a softening but also a more clear sense of my sadness. like a giving into the sadness
Michael Andreen, Cornwall
As you let your attention go to the fact that we feel so incapable, I felt saddened and that leaden sensation that comes with my depression. I felt lost. When you asked what’s happening my feelings all tended toward my fear of extinction and erasure, death in other words. I wanted to surrender. When you prompted us to ask, can I be with this?, a that great leaden weight, like what I imagine kryptonite is to superman exerted malign gravity that made it hard to sit with.
Very lost
I went from knowing I felt scared and tearful to breathing more deeply and letting a few tears fall
These questions are very helpfull for me it brings me to my true self.
Its really fine to hear a talk from Tara it always reassures me
Thank you so very much for this. Very familiar and I look forward to learning about methods and actions I can take.
There’s no audio although it indicates there is sound.
My eyes started to water and I physically felt like I wanted to cry. There was less tension in my head/mind.
I felt pressure on my chest and sadness. Then in the second step being with this with kindness I could feel how this pressure slowly transformed getting softer and my heart felt raw and more open. Thank you
Thank you for your caring and sharing. I felt unworthy and think I have a lot to learn about self-compassion, a journey is beginning 🙂
I felt the tightness in my heart center and that critical voice was loud and clear.
I imagine myself comforting me, an arm around my shoulder. Then I only felt sadness.
Very sad today, but better after about 20 minutes.
I realized my heart was hurting physically from deep things and past events, and deep grief that I hate myself for; for the pain I experience from a narcissitic family member. I thought about trying to give care to my suffering, The thought came into my mind that I don’t deserve care, especially with all I should be doing but give up on from depression, anxiety, PTSD and more. I am “supposed” to take care of myself but my mind says I once deserved it, but no more. Yet I adore Tara Brach (and Jack Kornfield), and call them my teachers. I don’t practice mindfulness much anymore, yet Thich Nhat Hanh, Tara, and Jack know truth. I want to learn to care about me, if anyone can help me I believe Tara and Jack and listening to Thay can help me.
I felt the pain in my back, relaxing a little.
first, thank you. your dedication and generosity are deeply appreciated.
It’s so easy to forget to practice this “checking in” via the two wings.. I meditate, read Buddhist teachings near-daily and know to practice RAIN when the decades-old trance of unworthiness kicks in – which can be dozens of times daily.. and I can have days and even weeks of feeling so mindful, present, kind, connected, etc., but I also go thru periods where I kinda give up – i.e., “geeze – do I really need to do this RAIN thing again?” and feel like shit… then I amp up my vigilance and I’m back to where I want to be.. so, weather, right? some days golden, some stormy… and I guess I’ll close by saying, “It’s called a practice for a reason.” you gotta keep at it or it – at least for me – disintegrates.. looking forward to the next installment – again, thank you.
The little me felt warmth. Like a nurturing hug. ❤️ Trying to sit with myself & allow l to be. Thank you 😊
I felt a sense of relief when I tried to bring kindness.
Thank you so much! I’m a parts therapist and love finding new ways to help my clients (and myself too) tap into compassion.
I felt calmer and more content and less anxious. Thanks for your work…I am making my way through the 40 day mindfulness tapes too!
David Brasted Russell Island Qld Australia
It’s hard when you start to bring those questions of yourself and acknowledge that we had constantly talk to ourselves passing judgment. Maybe, because we have internalized the criticisms felt from others or because we have been conditioned by our beliefs and culture to think and feel that way. Perceptions can be deceiving and sometimes they are right. Our internal self assigned ‘values’ are constantly questioning and judging us. I feel that I haven’t practiced self kindness. It feels scary, vulnerable, sad, lonely and depressing.
I understand that Carmen and feel when we start these practices things will begin to change…small steps and no beating ourselves up!
Thank you Tara. With the practice my body relaxed. I also felt some ease from the grip of a particular self-judgement. I felt sadness at the realization that I can’t fix a long-term relationship that has been supportive in ways and yet frequently distant and sometimes harshly judgmental.
I felt a wave of relief…..and a sweet momentary acknowledgement of a deeper, loving self underneath all the distractions of life.
Giving kindness to myself has always been hard for me. For years others have told me that I’m really hard on myself. But while listening to Tara I began to see just how hard I’ve been to my self. I got divorced 34 years ago and have always had a fear to start over. I can see now why. I need to treat myself the way I treat others, with warm hearted kindness.
Everything softened…I saw my best and let it be.
I noticed feelings of hurt bordering on despair and when I allowed myself to feel these feelings with awareness & curiosity and then added kindness I felt a release and lightness.
I noticed a slight opening when I sat with myself, followed by some strong resistance. I feel disconnected from my body and inner voice. I don’t quite understand if compassion is separate from giving an open form on mindfulness to my body.
Understanding its an inside feeling! I feel overwhelmed with guilt
A feeling of calmness and warmth, lessening of negativity. Thank you 💜
Tara’s video comes at a most important time. I’m in the midst of a very recent 13 year breakup and struggling with self blame; Having self compassion to allow myself to grieve is hard but necessary. Thank you for sharing your story.
Penni
Butterflies and guilt
I felt more softness to myself and was able to forgive myself more when I relaxed into the tension I was holding
I recognised i dont have to impress or rely on others for recognition or acceptance.As everyone is different with different likes, values and ways.
I just have to recognise please and accept myself based on my own likes,values and ways.
so its about accepting this in both myself and others without harsh judgement and having more kindness to both self and others for those differences.
sometimes I need to be stronger and trust my own values and ways rather than always bending to others to please others
Thanks,Tara,for sharing her own experience.
Its so hard to find and change old patterns of ignoring myself.
Video was helpful to pay attention .
What happened was a feeling of flowing soft energy, life flowing in the body when meeting the experience with kindness. Rejuvenating experience
Thank you, it gives me a new kind of perspective in nursing my deeper hidden second layer of trauma. Feels like opening a prison door.
It felt like I was touching on something essential inside me; getting at the very core of my suffering. When I asked myself to respond with kindness, I felt like I reacted with my gut rather than all the 101 over thinking ideas I usually came up with. It was something I didn’t want to hear initially but knew deep inside that it was the best way for my true self. I know the path I chose in that moment may give me uncomfortable feelings as I grow, but ultimately I feel unburdened that I am going to do what is good for me.
It felt easy/easier to ask for forgiveness and to forgive myself. I could turn towards myself lovingly and towards those I always had the best intentions for also lovingly and openly. Nothing was in the way and it felt freeing to be honest and understood.
I felt sadness, fear and grief because, like you, I’m harsh with myself. in offering myself kindness I felt relieved and supported 😌. There can be a sadness where I can just be there with this feeling without fear of aloneness and without self judgement. Breathe.