Truly powerful sharing, gained a deeper sense of the U turn, and in my own experience, a sense of renewed response- ability to give time to heart nd honour what s happened/ happening; the allowing element not avoiding attending to feelings. I have more work to meeting feelings I fear overwhelm in.
conscious of really being able to see the wounding in others.
The dig nd leg in the trap great analogy … I hear be kind in struggle with feelings unwilling to feel and importance of leaning into resources for unconditional acceptance Karl Roger s invites in us. Thank you Tara ??
Deep Gratitude. If I let go of judgement and blame, my life can come to peace first for myself and then also in relationship with others. I feel a new quality inside that is bigger, more soft and very alive. I don’t feel threatened and in lack but rather in abundance held by the universe. I feel love I guess.
Thank You, Tara for your wishes and work. Compassion for myself and others, especially when it’s difficult is so important. It helps me to know you can start again, every moment.
Thank you for this wonderful reminder to focus on my own feelings instead of exernalizing them by judgment and blame. I felt really touched following this short path about self compassion. It feels like the right path to follow. Very helpful also the hint to find the right time to do this and not to be too early with it. In my work as a singing teacher and therapist I follow more and more the idea that we are perfectly ok the way we are right now and from there we can evolve and develop.
Thank you again!
I am really connecting and enjoying having access to these beautiful, free workshops that you are putting so much grace into.
I really loved the use of visual storytelling to help share the client’s story. This was amazing. It makes me me curious about how client’s might dramatize their own healing journeys to help other’s heal – through audio and video – wow. Thanks for the creative inspiration – I am going to continue to explore this idea for engaged psycho-education practices. I am passionate about therapy and education – and both your published work, and Ruth’s amazing learning programs, have supported me in my first two years of private practice here in Wales. I would love to learn more about the retreat format that you offer, and how it works, and how I could co-create some healing retreats here in the U.K.
I appreciate how you integrate the teachings of Buddha with personal healing journeys of contemporary therapy work.
The leg in trap is powerful metaphor. It helps me to appreciate how powerful finding the right metaphor can be. I love it when client’s find their own metaphors! I always write those down in session – as the precious uncoveries.
Thank you for your dedication to helping healers to heal in this times of disintegration, and for keeping the flame of hope burning. – Aniko Poet & Therapist ‘Humble Mouse Counselling for Change’
It’s myself I judge and chronically blame & others , not so much. I’ve been working on the u-turn with others. I found your practice helpful and enhanced by the image of the dog in the trap and placing my hand on my heart.
I am really connecting and enjoying having access to these beautiful, free workshops that you are putting so much grace into.
I really loved the use of visual storytelling to help share the client’s story. This was amazing. It makes me me curious about how client’s might dramatize their own healing journeys to help other’s heal – through audio and video – wow. Thanks for the creative inspiration – I am going to continue to explore this idea for engaged psycho-education practices. I am passionate about therapy and education – and both your published work, and Ruth’s amazing learning programs, have supported me in my first two years of private practice here in Wales. I would love to learn more about the retreat format that you offer, and how it works, and how I could co-create some healing retreats here in the U.K.
I appreciate how you integrate the teachings of Buddha with personal healing journeys of contemporary therapy work.
The leg in trap is powerful metaphor. It helps me to appreciate how powerful finding the right metaphor can be. I love it when client’s find their own metaphors! I always right those down in session – as the precious uncoveries.
Thank you for your dedication to helping healers to heal in this times of disintegration, and for keeping the flame of hope burning. – Aniko Poet & Therapist ‘Humble Mouse Counselling for Change’
Thank you so much Dr. Tara for such a informative, inspiring and enlightening workshop. I have never realised that my expectations to my little one can be harsh judgement and my blame on my ex. Having watched and followed your sessions, especially the last one, which guided me to a journey discovering the deep layer in my consciousness, my feelings of extreme pain and anxiety for not having control over my little one – his look, his gestures, his behaviours, his interests…..so much alike as his father. I blame my ex for many things. Now I recognise that I may just need to let it go, let go the blame, which hurt so much the mother-son relationship and, myself. Look forward to more of your workshops.
Loved these videos. The U turn really does work to get back into your higher-self and being compassionate for yourself and others. Would really like to do the full program and hope there will be scholarships for the program. Sending love to the world. Annie
Need to remind myself to use this U turn. Lately there is so much change in people I see who are so locked in fears, leftover instability due to the issues going on in the world that cause so much ongoing dysregulation among citizens.
Need to realize this daily almost twice a week when after long term work these issues are more frequent in our traumatized world today. The minute you mentioned the U turn, it became so subtle on what I need to do next week to help those not yet able to see their own issues without hurt feelings that I am not so used to seeing in my profession, except in certain personalities.
Have been lucky as I have worked with abuse victims in groups for decades and never had these types of personalities overwhelming themselves so profoundly with others in the group. Now I see it more often after all this decades. I was lucky as Rogerian work helped me stay regulated and congruent with their pain/. Acting out was at a minimum.
Now I am lucky as I cannot do groups due to the pandemic isolating most of us. I hope to maintain a culture to rise above these hurtful people, knowing they are not acting out toward me but angst toward the world and recent circumstances, foreign to so many in our society.
Love, Love the U turn. I can use it next week with at least two folks. Self compassion has been my new watch phrase with almost every client. This is so necessary for our work.
Thanks for the summary as I was already writing my comments that fit in with your view of what is going on today. Self compassion so needed as we use that U turn to help them and me to reframe where is the session going. Timing is so important nowadays. This U turn process will help to solve that. Clients are so fearful nowadays and enter many of possible ffff reactions. The faster they cycle the more the U turn can be used gracefully. Thanks, I needed the U turn two days ago.
You words give me hope that I am able to release myself from judgement around a painful divorce.
My husband and I each carried our own trap for decades.
It would be wonderful to be free of decades of chronic hurt and pain from chronic judgement and pain that runs so deep. Sometimes along with the grief that’s bound up in it, it’s unbearable. I listen to your talks and meditations a lot,they are so inspiring. However to break free from these crippling ties to find self compassion and to find a way let go would bring so much joy and freedom. To be able to forgive and accept and move on. Also how to create boundaries?
Thank you so much, I feel like being called by my name, especially by the last words in the third video. I have been frustrated in the last weeks, not knowing what to do that makes sense in these times while at the same time discovering deep layers of anxiousness of intimacy and self blame I didn’t know it was there.
What do you do when a female chiropractor you went for help, assaulted you instead targeting a severely injured part of your body? it resulted in me chocking for 5 months and needing therapy for a year! she skipped town and now is across the country and managed to avoid any accountability. I need to find a way to make sure she is not able to practice again, so she can’t hurt others, then I can let go of anger and resentment, so for me this is not very simple.
Once again a huge thank you. I am using this practice from you since over a year now and it helped me a lot already. I feel free and a light like a feather. I am trying to show this practice to my husband who would benefit from it here hugely. The day will come that he will try it out and get all the releasing energy from it
Thank YOU Tara. These three videos are true gems. I could feel a lot of sorrow building up and overflowing while doing the U-turn, and a sense of relief when I opened up to the sorrow and hurt that the other part might be feeling too. I believe I would be a much wiser and at peace person if I let go of judgement and chronic blame. By being compassionate I would find release and head towards a greater, fuller sense of happiness.
Thank you Tara – a reminder to be self compassionate to myself, compassionate to others when old patterns formed as a result of childhood abuse are triggered and how this needs to be practised regularly .
I would be free to be myself and not be scared to show my real self with its weakness and flows.
I can’t say though that it seems easy to embark on this path!
Dearest Tara this was so lovely to listen to.This is such a helpful way to bring us back to remembering we are all connected and all important to each other. This is part of my work and this ancient wisdom is what the world needs to hear more off now. Please keep giving as much help to the world as you can , I am at the beginning of my journey in this work ( even though I am actually old!) and hope to share the healing too.
Dear Tara. It was sooo revealing to simply experience what it is like to distance myself from the hurt of a dad who was unable to tell me in words how much he loved me and how I was judging him for that hurt. I saw some light, and am deeply grateful to you for that.
Thank you very much this teaching, Tara.
So true, so clear , so straight. The Metapher of the wounded dog shows in a touching way our common vulnerability we are used to hide instead of being with it…so that we could receive help to get out of our pain … it is a decision inside us we are asked to do. Again and again. Thank you for bringing this in consciousness. Thank you for your gift!
Response-ability is indeed only truly possible once we let go of self-judgement which otherwise sabotages attempts at reaching inner and outer peace. in full gratitude for all your noble teaching Tara.
So important to recognise what’s happening when we feel ourselves tensing and shrinking inside. I appreciated the pause to turn and offer compassion to yourself. And even more to pause and turn to sè the vulnerability in the other person. Melting does occur
I would be living with more lightness, less feelings of tension in my head and chest and more able to show kindness, love and assistance towards those around me, and myself!
I would be living with more lightness, less feelings of tension in my head and chest and more able to show kindness, love and assistance towards those around me, and myself!
Inga Andersone says
Thanks Tara, it resonates deeply with my own experience.
Inga
S E says
Thank you Tara, wonderful tools
Catherine Andrews says
Blame is indeed very destructive. Fine line between blame of others and self blame -,the latter generally lurking underneath
Gwen Walker says
Truly powerful sharing, gained a deeper sense of the U turn, and in my own experience, a sense of renewed response- ability to give time to heart nd honour what s happened/ happening; the allowing element not avoiding attending to feelings. I have more work to meeting feelings I fear overwhelm in.
conscious of really being able to see the wounding in others.
The dig nd leg in the trap great analogy … I hear be kind in struggle with feelings unwilling to feel and importance of leaning into resources for unconditional acceptance Karl Roger s invites in us. Thank you Tara ??
Agnieszka Sadowska says
I’d be a,calmer, grounded more compassionate person, and this would have a positive effect on those around me. Thank you Tara
Nina Cejnar says
Deep Gratitude. If I let go of judgement and blame, my life can come to peace first for myself and then also in relationship with others. I feel a new quality inside that is bigger, more soft and very alive. I don’t feel threatened and in lack but rather in abundance held by the universe. I feel love I guess.
Thelma Burgonio-Watson says
On point!
I’m there with you.
Thank you.
Nicoline Hoos says
Thank You, Tara for your wishes and work. Compassion for myself and others, especially when it’s difficult is so important. It helps me to know you can start again, every moment.
Thomas Mattern says
Thank you for this wonderful reminder to focus on my own feelings instead of exernalizing them by judgment and blame. I felt really touched following this short path about self compassion. It feels like the right path to follow. Very helpful also the hint to find the right time to do this and not to be too early with it. In my work as a singing teacher and therapist I follow more and more the idea that we are perfectly ok the way we are right now and from there we can evolve and develop.
Thank you again!
Aniko Lewis says
Hi Tara,
I am really connecting and enjoying having access to these beautiful, free workshops that you are putting so much grace into.
I really loved the use of visual storytelling to help share the client’s story. This was amazing. It makes me me curious about how client’s might dramatize their own healing journeys to help other’s heal – through audio and video – wow. Thanks for the creative inspiration – I am going to continue to explore this idea for engaged psycho-education practices. I am passionate about therapy and education – and both your published work, and Ruth’s amazing learning programs, have supported me in my first two years of private practice here in Wales. I would love to learn more about the retreat format that you offer, and how it works, and how I could co-create some healing retreats here in the U.K.
I appreciate how you integrate the teachings of Buddha with personal healing journeys of contemporary therapy work.
The leg in trap is powerful metaphor. It helps me to appreciate how powerful finding the right metaphor can be. I love it when client’s find their own metaphors! I always write those down in session – as the precious uncoveries.
Thank you for your dedication to helping healers to heal in this times of disintegration, and for keeping the flame of hope burning. – Aniko Poet & Therapist ‘Humble Mouse Counselling for Change’
Marie McQueen says
It’s myself I judge and chronically blame & others , not so much. I’ve been working on the u-turn with others. I found your practice helpful and enhanced by the image of the dog in the trap and placing my hand on my heart.
Aniko Lewis says
Hi Tara,
I am really connecting and enjoying having access to these beautiful, free workshops that you are putting so much grace into.
I really loved the use of visual storytelling to help share the client’s story. This was amazing. It makes me me curious about how client’s might dramatize their own healing journeys to help other’s heal – through audio and video – wow. Thanks for the creative inspiration – I am going to continue to explore this idea for engaged psycho-education practices. I am passionate about therapy and education – and both your published work, and Ruth’s amazing learning programs, have supported me in my first two years of private practice here in Wales. I would love to learn more about the retreat format that you offer, and how it works, and how I could co-create some healing retreats here in the U.K.
I appreciate how you integrate the teachings of Buddha with personal healing journeys of contemporary therapy work.
The leg in trap is powerful metaphor. It helps me to appreciate how powerful finding the right metaphor can be. I love it when client’s find their own metaphors! I always right those down in session – as the precious uncoveries.
Thank you for your dedication to helping healers to heal in this times of disintegration, and for keeping the flame of hope burning. – Aniko Poet & Therapist ‘Humble Mouse Counselling for Change’
Michelle Yang says
Thank you so much Dr. Tara for such a informative, inspiring and enlightening workshop. I have never realised that my expectations to my little one can be harsh judgement and my blame on my ex. Having watched and followed your sessions, especially the last one, which guided me to a journey discovering the deep layer in my consciousness, my feelings of extreme pain and anxiety for not having control over my little one – his look, his gestures, his behaviours, his interests…..so much alike as his father. I blame my ex for many things. Now I recognise that I may just need to let it go, let go the blame, which hurt so much the mother-son relationship and, myself. Look forward to more of your workshops.
Maysoon Rassam says
The meditation really worked.the u turn helped in transforming the hurt into compassion for self and the person who hurt me.
Thank you Tara
Maysoon
Lorraine Schaefers says
I found this mini course very interesting and learning to be more compassionate is something we all need more of in our lives. Thank you.
Annie Harmon says
Loved these videos. The U turn really does work to get back into your higher-self and being compassionate for yourself and others. Would really like to do the full program and hope there will be scholarships for the program. Sending love to the world. Annie
Anna Scotland says
This came at exactly the right moment for me. Thank you ??
Marcy says
Need to remind myself to use this U turn. Lately there is so much change in people I see who are so locked in fears, leftover instability due to the issues going on in the world that cause so much ongoing dysregulation among citizens.
Need to realize this daily almost twice a week when after long term work these issues are more frequent in our traumatized world today. The minute you mentioned the U turn, it became so subtle on what I need to do next week to help those not yet able to see their own issues without hurt feelings that I am not so used to seeing in my profession, except in certain personalities.
Have been lucky as I have worked with abuse victims in groups for decades and never had these types of personalities overwhelming themselves so profoundly with others in the group. Now I see it more often after all this decades. I was lucky as Rogerian work helped me stay regulated and congruent with their pain/. Acting out was at a minimum.
Now I am lucky as I cannot do groups due to the pandemic isolating most of us. I hope to maintain a culture to rise above these hurtful people, knowing they are not acting out toward me but angst toward the world and recent circumstances, foreign to so many in our society.
Love, Love the U turn. I can use it next week with at least two folks. Self compassion has been my new watch phrase with almost every client. This is so necessary for our work.
Thanks for the summary as I was already writing my comments that fit in with your view of what is going on today. Self compassion so needed as we use that U turn to help them and me to reframe where is the session going. Timing is so important nowadays. This U turn process will help to solve that. Clients are so fearful nowadays and enter many of possible ffff reactions. The faster they cycle the more the U turn can be used gracefully. Thanks, I needed the U turn two days ago.
Laura C says
Thank you for this mini course!
Anne says
You words give me hope that I am able to release myself from judgement around a painful divorce.
My husband and I each carried our own trap for decades.
Sarah says
It would be wonderful to be free of decades of chronic hurt and pain from chronic judgement and pain that runs so deep. Sometimes along with the grief that’s bound up in it, it’s unbearable. I listen to your talks and meditations a lot,they are so inspiring. However to break free from these crippling ties to find self compassion and to find a way let go would bring so much joy and freedom. To be able to forgive and accept and move on. Also how to create boundaries?
Denise Noel DeBique says
I would be more confident
Karin Grießbauer says
Thank you so much, I feel like being called by my name, especially by the last words in the third video. I have been frustrated in the last weeks, not knowing what to do that makes sense in these times while at the same time discovering deep layers of anxiousness of intimacy and self blame I didn’t know it was there.
Ger Ger says
Very vulnerable and exposed
Sylvia Vandenbussche says
Thank you, very helpful advice….
Varda Rose says
What do you do when a female chiropractor you went for help, assaulted you instead targeting a severely injured part of your body? it resulted in me chocking for 5 months and needing therapy for a year! she skipped town and now is across the country and managed to avoid any accountability. I need to find a way to make sure she is not able to practice again, so she can’t hurt others, then I can let go of anger and resentment, so for me this is not very simple.
Sabine Bossert Tomé says
Once again a huge thank you. I am using this practice from you since over a year now and it helped me a lot already. I feel free and a light like a feather. I am trying to show this practice to my husband who would benefit from it here hugely. The day will come that he will try it out and get all the releasing energy from it
Fran Hall says
Very helpful to be reminded of how to look at ourselves compassionately.
Elsa Murray says
Thank YOU Tara. These three videos are true gems. I could feel a lot of sorrow building up and overflowing while doing the U-turn, and a sense of relief when I opened up to the sorrow and hurt that the other part might be feeling too. I believe I would be a much wiser and at peace person if I let go of judgement and chronic blame. By being compassionate I would find release and head towards a greater, fuller sense of happiness.
Tanya Buck says
Thank you, this was beautiful, clear, helpful and moving. Keeping the image of the wounded animal in mind brings me closer to compassion.
Doreen Peri says
Thank you so much! ❤️
Susy Attewell says
Thank you Tara – a reminder to be self compassionate to myself, compassionate to others when old patterns formed as a result of childhood abuse are triggered and how this needs to be practised regularly .
celina tonkin says
nice and genlte
Ines Otto says
It hurts, but it feels more real and lively than any Story.
Deborah Bee says
I believe I would be a much happier person – one who wasn’t always comparing themselves to others or living with constant self-doubt.
Anne Simpson says
I would be free to be myself and not be scared to show my real self with its weakness and flows.
I can’t say though that it seems easy to embark on this path!
lesley provan says
Dearest Tara this was so lovely to listen to.This is such a helpful way to bring us back to remembering we are all connected and all important to each other. This is part of my work and this ancient wisdom is what the world needs to hear more off now. Please keep giving as much help to the world as you can , I am at the beginning of my journey in this work ( even though I am actually old!) and hope to share the healing too.
Anonymous says
It hurts, but it feels more real and lively than any Story.
Ryk Croukamp says
Dear Tara. It was sooo revealing to simply experience what it is like to distance myself from the hurt of a dad who was unable to tell me in words how much he loved me and how I was judging him for that hurt. I saw some light, and am deeply grateful to you for that.
Kate EH says
Thank you – this was really helpful
I found the imagery of looking at things with a new perspective- ie the person who is hurting us, being caught in a trap – really helpful
Joleen Breen says
I might be free.
Thank you for this.
Claudia U says
Thank you very much this teaching, Tara.
So true, so clear , so straight. The Metapher of the wounded dog shows in a touching way our common vulnerability we are used to hide instead of being with it…so that we could receive help to get out of our pain … it is a decision inside us we are asked to do. Again and again. Thank you for bringing this in consciousness. Thank you for your gift!
Ann Hendrickx says
Response-ability is indeed only truly possible once we let go of self-judgement which otherwise sabotages attempts at reaching inner and outer peace. in full gratitude for all your noble teaching Tara.
Irene Colefax says
Thank you for this wise and beautiful practice, given with such kindness and generosity
Michele Broad says
So important to recognise what’s happening when we feel ourselves tensing and shrinking inside. I appreciated the pause to turn and offer compassion to yourself. And even more to pause and turn to sè the vulnerability in the other person. Melting does occur
John Harrison says
The tears flowed and are flowing. I forgive my mother, grandmother and other family members for neglecting me when I was young.
Frank Angus says
Relaxed
Cheryl A. says
I would be living with more lightness, less feelings of tension in my head and chest and more able to show kindness, love and assistance towards those around me, and myself!
Fatiha Benao says
The image of the dog really helped me to shift and understand better the fear/see/understand/……shift .
It really does make sense.
Im caught up with the same self talk since 10 years with the same person and feeling unworthy and hurt.
Thank you Tara. This allow me to free myself
Cheryl Ashwin says
I would be living with more lightness, less feelings of tension in my head and chest and more able to show kindness, love and assistance towards those around me, and myself!