I’ll admit it. I’ve been counting down the days until this year’s Winter Solstice.
As the sun sets around 4:20 each afternoon, and darkness envelops the windows of NICABM, I find myself longing for more hours of daylight.
Is it any wonder, then, that images of light and dark play such a prominent role in so many winter holiday celebrations?
The celebration of Hanukkah commemorates the miraculous supply of oil that kept lights burning for eight days following the rededication of the temple in Jerusalem. The Christian tradition celebrates light coming into the world in the form of a child.
Yet the genesis of each of these celebrations took place against the backdrop of unspeakable darkness.
Hanukkah celebrates the restoration of religious liberty after King Antiochus Epiphanes outlawed Jewish religious practice and desecrated the temple in Jerusalem.
Wise men followed a star to find a prophetic child after his parents fled to Egypt during King Herod’s Slaughter of the Innocents.
Whether or not you subscribe to either of these traditions, it’s hard to escape the reality that this year’s celebrations will also occur against the backdrop of nearly unspeakable darkness in this world.
My heart grows heavy as news continues to roll in about shattered truces and trapped refugees in the City of Aleppo.
What can be done?
Earlier this year, the NICABM team met with Cheryl Anderson from Save the Children to hear about their work in caring for refugees. Save the Children has staff on the ground in Syria, and around the world, providing food, shelter, and health services to overwhelming refugee populations.
As painful as it was to hear some of the stories, I still recall what Cheryl said:
I don’t have the answers, but I always have hope.
She told us a story about an old man who walked along a beach littered with starfish that had washed ashore. Because the sun was up and the tide was going out, the old man picked up starfish, one by one, and gently tossed them back into the sea.
Seeing this, a young man questioned why the old man bothered trying to save the starfish when there were so many, and he couldn’t possibly save them all. What difference could his efforts possibly make?
As the old man tossed another starfish into the ocean, he said, “It made a difference to that one.”
It can be easy to become overwhelmed by the magnitude of suffering in the world. But as Cheryl said, there is always hope.
Supporting the work of charitable organizations, including Save the Children, has always been a priority of NICABM. We value the opportunity to make a difference in the lives of refugees, or to build classrooms in places like Kenya, and in Pakistan, where educational opportunities are so limited.
I’ll have more to say about this soon. But in the meantime, I want to wish you the very best during this season of celebration, and in the year to come.
Now I’d like to hear from you. Where in the world would you like to see a brighter light shining? To call attention to the need, and invite others to join in making a difference?
Please leave a comment below.
My name is Holly Eckert, and I’m a woman living in Seattle and turning 50ty tomorrow. I greatly appreciated Ruth’s article, and being an intelligent, activist, artist living in Seattle, I deeply agree with her perspective that it is in the “intentional”, “actively cultivated” experience of hope that most all humans can find health and wellness. Being a choreographer and dancer who pushed too hard and didn’t have good healthcare, I did find myself facing the chronic illness of epilepsy in my mid-thirties. It was dark and I so needed the light of hope. I didn’t find this in popular culture or conventional, western medicine. However, over time, in strange place I did find it, and when I began to find this hope, I began to recover. I now live peacefully with my epilepsy. It “walks” with me, I don’t “fight” it as many doctors suggested I do. That shift in my relationship to my illness was one of the most healing experiences inside of it. I wrote a very good book about my experience which was published in 2013. It’s titled, “SEIZED – Searching for Health In the United States”. You can find it listed on amazon.com under my name and its title. I’m as good a writer as I am a dancer, also something I didn’t know until I “walked” with epilepsy. I urge you all who read this to continue to cultivate “light” in lives of darkness, always to remember that you can’t have light until there is darkness. As Plato taught us so long ago, we don’t know we’re in the cave until we come out of it. Be well and check out my story through my book.
Suffering is ubiquitous, this will be relieved only through a change in the minds and hearts of mankind. First, one must have compassion for oneself, for if you cannot have for yourself, you cannot have it for others. Then, one must examine pragmatically what can be done that will be most effective in the short run, then what are the long term options for making a lasting difference. This is one of the rules of complexity. Complexity is effective only if it is creating simplicity.
The many worldwide issues that perpetuate suffering will endure until mankind takes a very pragmatic look at the importance and need to alleviate the insanity that persists between cultures, nations, and individuals. I happen to believe that it is UP TO US AS INDIVIDUALS TO DO THIS. We cannot continue to wait for universal agreement on a solution as that will never happen….
I’d like to see more light shining in the lives of family caregivers who care for elderly and chronically ill loved ones without much, if any, help or support, much less respite. These courageous individuals are the backbone of our long-term care system. They give of themselves many times to the detriment of their own health, social relationships, work life, and quality of life. They receive little to no training to perform many of the same duties nurses do. They are many times overlooked by doctors who lack compassion and understanding about the pivotal role they play in the health and wellbeing of those for which they care. Caregiving doesn’t take a holiday! There are an estimated 44 million of them who cared yesterday and today and will do so again tomorrow. Feel free to post a message of support on FaceBook at Caregiver Connections. Thank you!
Tap into the light for myself first!! As a healer for troubled kids..need to fill up my lamp with oil!!! Wrote a child prayer for Christmas…sent to MP Charlie Angus for all the suicides of children not just adolescents in their communities!! Indigineous communities need hope…they are struggling..suicide rates up for teens across Canada…we have a crisis here! Xmas reflection is we need to bear witness to people’s struggling…to listen not judge…people are isolated and disconnected with human connection to feelings…by product of fb!!! Does save the Children work in Canada? I want to get my poem out…where do I send it? Is there one voice for kids rights? So many charities overwhelming trying to find connections myself? We all work in isolation and burning out…no one seems to care about the level of distress our kids are in!!
We stay in Rustenburg, North West Province, South Africa. Our Church is called, The Rock. We work hand in hand with Child Welfare and are currently building a house of safety for abused or neglected children, mainly because of drug or alcohol addiction
We are struggling because of lack of funding. We finished building, but now we must furnish the flats and find reputable house parents for these children.
Lenie Grant
Shalom! Shalom!!!
Ruth . Yes hope is our only hope.
Time changes things.
Solutions are for ever evolving.
Yet everything is still within the self.
Once you give good and shelter, this buys time for the individual
To exist physically, but the real healing is within our soul which is projected through the individuals understanding, needs and fears… for me it’s about trying to find the balance, as each soul responsible for it’s own chooses and decisions in how to think feel and act in each moment…
I have found some times the more you give the more they want,
Without taking responsibility for themself.
So where does it begin and end…
Do unto others as you would do unto yourself.
It’s in need of new strategies.
Thank you for your great work Ruth.
lovely way to put back hope into the equation
Canada accepted more than 35,000 Syrian refugees this yearend inspire of the worst ever fire that evacuated more than 90,000 people from the town ship of Fort McMurray Alberta ( without a single death).there appears to be a ray of hope after a year!
Merry christmas ,Happy Hanukkah and Happy holidays with hope of Joy in the new year
You know Ruth, what a loaded question you ask? I always appreciate your thoughtfulness and in this season where people are so pre-occupied. Our world is so much closer than it was ten years ago, and I believe there is no better time to care for oneself than now. We can become overwhelmed with a sense of hopelessness, but I challenge people to be more proactive; turn off the phone and tv, do something creative and fun for a couple days! The world will still be there tomorrow.
There are many places both in the US
and worldwide but the suffering in Syria
leaves me heart broken. I understand intellectually
why no one is able/willing to try to stop the destruction
going on there but the other part of me feels
like we have abandoned so many in need.
Syria is in the news but countries in Africa
are experiencing the same killing of innocents
and nothing is being done to stop this
carnage and suffering.
Thank you Ruth for your generous spirit.
Is it posible to adopt a child?
Be the change 🙂
Let’s have a little bright light shining in the moment and stop insisting that life be always seen through a recitation of dour events. This was a prime example……Does this imply that you are a more compassionate and righteous person? Lighten up !
Dear Ruth,
Many thanks to you for your continuous efforts to bring light into our lives and the lives of those we work with, live with and love.
May peace and hope walk with you and those you love at this special time of year and in the year ahead
Take care
Eileen
I have to say that following the anger displayed by those who voted for trump
was very frightening and discouraging,(“Jail her,jail her!”). I could not wrap my
mind around this bing the U.S. what a large population of uneducated, angry,
and terribly misinformed group…..I will continue to work in my community
and do all I can. I am still recovering from the shock of it all…….Myself and
all my friends can not even watch the news….the pictures in our living rooms
are beyond even what can be expected for anyone to handle emotionally.
year after year of war and homeless people in our country have no shelter and
my friend who is a special ed teacher buys supplies for her class room out of
her pocket…….
Nona
At the end of this year I wish to thank you for your tireless
job of instructing, supporting, instructing us about all that is
good in our lives, without minimizing the terrible tragedies
surrounding us!
I appreciate all you do!
You make a big difference!
Thank you,
Myriam
Same goes for me. Thank you!
Thank you for your good words! Merry Christmas to you and your family.
I have felt this darkness strongly since last June. The amount of anger and hatred all around the globe is overwhelming. I know I benefit from touching base deeply with my spiritual resources and address my psychologiical house cleaning challenges. Beyond that I am deeply moved and fascinated with Tom Friedman’s newest book, _Thank You for Being Late: An Optimist’s Guide to Thriving in the Age of Accelerations_ (2016), a well-researched book in which he outlines the the many and fast-moving changes in technology, globalization, and climate change that are putting a great deal of pressure on the ability of us humans to adapt at a rate faster now than humans have had to do in the past. I enjoy absorbing Friedman’s global view, because in the long run this may lead to solutions different than we now conceive. The problems are so huge, I am saddened and overwhelmed by how enormous they are. Bigger and bigger problems maybe need new, fresh innovative structures to address Maslow’s hierarchical needs for humankind.
Thank you Ruth, this is a lovely article and a reminder that there is so much calling our attention and our need to act. Believe it or not, because I’m a Canadian neighbour to the north, in my recent meditations I have been praying to have hope for the U.S. people – all my many friends and those I don’t know – praying that the next 4 years are not as horrible as they potentially may be. I keep sending light and love and trust all will be well in the end.
Thank you so much for realizing that we are not all angry and hate filled people and are dismayed to consider what may be coming in the next four years.
I’d be very interested in hearing people’s feelings about what I feel is the disgusting election of Donald Trump. For myself it calls me to take some political action to oppose what I consider dangerous and unethical moves, eg the end of obamacare, nomination of such people as Jeff Sessions, etc. at the same time it calls me to continue to be the best husband, father, father in law and grandfather I can be and the best therapist, family member and friend I can be and try to show more loving kindness. This way I can shine some light in what feels like powerful impending political darkness. It also helps for me to meditate more. Larry Ludwig, PhD
I am reflecting on the posts that have been prompted by Ruth’s reflections. Thanks to you Ruth, you have brought light to something very important. Though the world seems to be barely holding on to reason or compassion, I have hope because so many of you are lending light to the world through your acts of caring and thoughtful reflection. There are so many people who care and whose highest intentions are to bring justice, safety and healing to this world. May we all find starfish to remind us of our power in the world and may we all have saviours who will toss us back into a nourishing place when we feel parched. Blessings.
Thank you. Happy Holy Days to you and yours.
Frances
Thank you for this hopeful message !
Thank you for this. Systems in general that traumatize people, including some of our dysfunctional mental health systems, can make a person feel defeated. I love the starfish story. I know we can’t save the world but it is sometimes easy to forget that and become overwhelmed with the magnitude of the tasks and barriers we face daily in our work with other suffering humans. “There is always hope”. . . I love it. Thank you.
Hello Ruth
I would like to see the light of each of us shine a little brighter as we embrace the reality of what does seem a darker more divisive energy in the world. I challenge myself to focus on the good news in the world, things like Save the Children, the United Way and small acts of kindness as examples. I choose to find gratitude every day even when I feel overwhelmed by the pain of my clients, the world, myself. I read a wonderful quote a while ago (and unfortunately cannot remember the author) which i use as a reminder and way to ground myself. “Optimism is a conscious act of moral courage.”
Wishing the best of all Holiday traditions and a wish for all of us to choose peace.
Suzanne
I have almost ten years as a teacher is six of California’ State Prisons. I have worked in the mental health lock-up wards, on the death row, level four maximum security prisons (where stabbing happen weekly) and in the medical facility where old dying inmates bodies are carried out of the institution: sometimes six deaths a week. Prisons are dark, ugly corrupt places. The men and women working there have jobs that require them to lock others in cages. What do you think that does to a man after thirty years? I too have suffered from PTSD from witnessing violence and also nights of cognitive dissonance from making a living off of the terrible suffering of others. Inmates are sick, workers are sick and those administrators that make and administer policy are often full blow psychopaths and ego driven narcisists. Together the prison system is a hot pot filled with a deadly soup. We serve this poison up and call it justice and public safety. Meanwhile, it is simply a new version of slavery. It is time to begin to dismantle the prison system. It is time to begin to built a society and world that stops the origin of trauma that has caused all of this. It is time we start at the grassroots to love,care and raise our children in loving supportive and caring homes. It is time we put people before our lust for material possessions. It is time to dismantle the system that has created and perpetuates this sort of injustice. While I might be a shining light in a very dark place. I am getting tired and have lost hope.
Your first task now dear sister is how to get this starfish, you, to the ocean. You are running close to empty. You have to replenish!!
Thank you Debra, for speaking out about the prison-industrial complex we read about, from your personal experience, which must take some courage. I’m learning about the ‘foster-care to prison pipeline’, and there are a lot of people working to bring more awareness and real changes through public opinion, activism, and legal reforms. You have a real story to be told. Thanks, Stacy
Dear Debra, I write to you from half a world away in England. Thank you for being the hope so many times, to the hopeless. Please follow the advice modupe has given and get to the ocean, the world can’t afford to lose you.
An old man was walking in an unfamiliar hood. Accosted by youth. One of the youth persuaded his companions to let the old man pass safely. The old man rewarded the young savior with hope.
I feel grief stricken and so very helpless as the violence
grows and so grows the misery. Unfortunately they are scarred
for life. I fear they will face many serious mental and physical
illnesses later in life.
We will need more mental health workers in future
Your words are so true. In Jewish teaching – saving the life of one is as if you are saving the whole world. The times are dark indeed. May we each seek to be a source of light, and keep it glowing. Millions of candles will light up the darkness.
I get overwhelmed as well by all the suffering in our world. I try to remain grounded, I think globally and act less calmly. I keep doing my work helping one person at a time. Thank you for the work you do for Save the Children. You are so right. There’s always hope.
Ops. Think globally and act locally. I should proof read more crefully before submitting.
Bless you for helping the children. The refugees from all over Syria deserve a second chance at having a life if they were even able to escape the horror of the war.
I am so glad that I live in Canada where we welcome refugees after an extensive vetting process We do not discriminate our country is great because of its diversity and al the different people that make us one.
I enjoyed reading this article. It’s insightful, inspirational and timely. Thank you for sharing. May the light of this season bring hope and peace to all.
A timely email message for sure. My heart has been aching for the children of Aleppo. I’m glad to know about the foundation so I can contribute in some way. Thank you. The starfish story is wonderful. Blessings to you and have a happy holiday.
Thank you, Ruth, for putting words to my recent thoughts about the ongoing tragedies in the world. Your work is inspirational! From now on, instead of wishing I had so much more money to donate to each chosen cause, I will reframe my dollars as “starfish”! I am a clinician, a mindfulness and meditation practitioner and I enjoy every one of your classes.
Ruth, your question “where in the world would you like to see a brighter light shining” immediately gave me an image of tons of people each with a literal shiny light beaming out from their chests. This light has to be each our own energy, spirit, soul, whatever name can be applied. The change for all of us is like the concept of one person, one vote. It has to start with us, individually. One thing that social media does, besides allows for a whole lot of opinion but still with a relative state of anonymity, is it encourages us to become joiners of groups. While groups are good in some instances (ie. power in numbers,) it can also disallow thinking for one’s self and can allow for blind allegiances in the worse possible sense. The closed minded, hateful and malignant intent of posts I have read on Facebook this election season has at times, through fear and disgust, temporarily dimmed my own bright light. As pendulums swing, I can only hope for better evolvement of wisdom and intent of everyone, everywhere. But I do take solace in knowing that from my little corner of the world, it starts with ME.
The source of the lovely story about the man and the starfish is Loren Eiseley in his book, “The Star Thrower”. I highly recommend his writings.
While we all have limits which must t be recognized, and we can’t solve all the problems of the world, it helps to attempt to be a little bit kinder whenever possible. So many suffer in so many ways. Giving assistance to others is also a gift to ourselves. Very best wishes to all for the Holidays and New Year!
Thank you for the attribution, David, and for your kind comment.
And, thank you, Nancy, for your kind comment and for all that you are doing to assist so many others.
As an educational consultant, my deepest wish for light comes in the form of helping people see the tremendous importance of uncovering and understanding the patterns formed in the time of conception thru childhood…to the point where the individual goes out on his/her own. Particularly in addiction, these unconscious mindsets need to be painfully uncovered so new ways of being can emerge.
Being a middle-aged woman who came from an abusive, dysfunctional, poor family, I went on into my adult life thinking I could disengaged fully from that experience, carrying no residue of it inside me. I believed I could just “leave it behind” and take a different path of my own. Despite my talents and intelligence, I faced the impacts of those experiences on my health and wellness as I became older and older, surprised at how deeply that experience had impacted me. People do need more understanding of this phenomena in human life, and those who face it, need more help finding “light”. I wrote a book about my experience titled “SEIZED – Searching for Health In the United States”. You can find it on amazon.com. Be well, there are always ways even inside sickness.
Thank you Ruth, I think we often need to be reminded because generally perhaps we tend to take so much for granted and complain about so much! If only we all picked up star fish and tossed them back into the sea, but sadly, we don’t – instead – there is too much judgement, criticism, complaining, fear, prejudice…’stuff’ gets in the way. May 2017 bring with it more peace, acceptance, love and understanding and people committed to throwing starfish back into the sea.
Our children in this country suffering from abuse, neglect, and poverty…yes that’s is where I would like that light shine bright and to all the providers that continually find hope in healing…
and ampify that light to include our world.
The Radiance Sutras translated by Lorin Roche have provided grounding, peace and hope for me in this difficult time.
That is a beautiful story, thank you Ruth.
I think the children of Aleppo have to be my priority this year ……but thank you for the story of the old man and the starfish….its simplicity and obviousness brought tears to my eyes, and rescued me from the despair and hopelessness I can feel at times.
My small actions can make a difference to one person in one moment…that’s worth remembering. Thank you, Ruth.
Every day I cast the same request into the universal spirit, that all living creatures may be given each day what they need to cope with whatever they have to face, that they may experience as much peace and joy in their lives as possible. It’s my small way of sending a little positivity into the ether. A tiny drop in a huge ocean of pain, but the effects of which I hope will ripple out and become a wave of love to those who need it.
So beautiful. I will pray as wisely as you.
Africa is full of places waiting for hope.
Al the best and season greatings
Lydia
Dear Ruth,
Thank you so much for sharing these wise reflections. Indeed, the current world has many dark corners, and it also has many light spaces with radiant lives doing little big efforts for humanity and the planet, (like Cheryl) which are not broadcasted by the media.
Light?
May it shine within each of us, in every corner of the world, may it shine as faith, as hope, and all the positive brought by our basic goodness.
The best Holiday Greetings,
Sandra
Thank you for this reflection yes we must believe in hope
Thank you. As an advocate, pastoral couunselor, and ongoing student of behavioral medicine, hope is what drives me every day. I appreciate all that I receive from you and the resources you provide. It is inspiring to see your heart. Our work through Heart for the World Church International, Hope Centers, and Compassionate CARE is from a small community believing great things- all based in one word -Hope…Hope deferred makes the heart sick (Proverbs 13:12). Yes, there is always Hope.
Thank you, Ruth, for reaching out & shining your light. I am sure that for those trapped in Aleppo, hope is what helps them believe that a miracle will occur. I speak from experience as I too lived in a war in the Middle East. Even though we managed to flee 40 yrs ago, the memories are still vivid; as if it all happened yesterday. I must admit, that I have found healing & solace in the last few years of having listened to you & your learned guests. It is only then that I realized that the terrible memories had not been extinguished & just conveniently ‘tucked away’. I believe that if ‘everyone returned stranded starfish from their beaches, there would be more starfish in the water than on the beach.’ It is heartening to read all these uplifting comments by people who have big hearts. Thank you. Season’s greetings Ruth and best wishes for a happy and successful New Year.
Ten years ago I started a charity called Hearts for Lushoto Society. I just returned from a visit to the municipality of Lushoto in Tanzania. I am happy to say that we have made a positive difference in significantly reducing the rate of HIV infection in Lushoto by providing AIDS prevention education to all secondary students in 84 schools. I wish we could expand our program to other areas. h
We also provide small mico grants and medical insurance.
I saw two areas of great need during my visit. The materntiy ward at the hospital was full of women who had delivered babies and those waiting to deliver. There was only one birthing bed. They desperately need a new maternity ward.
In one of the secondary schools we visited the bathroom facilities consisted of Asian style toilets with no running water or toilet paper. About 700 students attend this school