For many clients, racism can be a deeply emotional topic.
The experience of racism (and the scenes of racial injustice that occur far too often) can trigger a wave of painful emotions that threaten to shift clients into a state of reactivity and overwhelm.
Shelly Harrell, PhD worked with a client who found herself in that very situation. In the video below, Shelly shares how she first addressed her client’s racial wounds – and then equipped her with strategies to ease her emotional reactivity.
Have a look.
And so, we initially just started talking through her experience, she was very critical of herself for her reactivity, but also knew that there were things that had not been explored around the issues of race in her life. She found herself very sensitive to racism in the media, at all levels of analysis. So from kind of larger sociopolitical issues to issues that she witnessed, and then not just in the media, but in her own experience.
Now, of course we know with the social media, if a video goes viral, we potentially get exposed to it over and over and over again because it shows up everywhere. So incidents of racial violence, she would watch stories and just was continuously being triggered by these things. But really where it came to a head were her children came of school age and she enrolled them in a predominantly white private school and her world then was surrounded by predominantly white, very privileged communities and she initially was feeling some commonality, but over time, her sense was that there were some ways of interacting with her that were devaluing, that were expecting her to be more stereotypical, and then her children were having some not so positive experiences that she was reacting to.
. . .
So she initially was aware she was being triggered; someone could say something, and she would feel a surge of anger or resentment. But she hadn’t explored this stuff before. This is sort of a different presentation of emotional triggers, but it was just as intense for her that it interfered with her relationships. It interfered with her sense of safety and well-being in the world.
And so part of the work with dealing with emotional triggers is giving some validity to where they come from: real things happen that wound us. If we don’t care for the wound, it can become infected or it can stay open and unhealed. She had never really cared for the wounds that racism had imposed in her life. She hadn’t attended to those. They had gotten uncared for, so it was a process of recognizing some of the roots of her woundedness at those multiple levels of analysis.
[We] looked at her familial and interpersonal [experiences], the death of her father, and those sorts of things. Also [we looked] at experiences in society including some of the ways she felt wounded by stereotypes, prejudice, and racism, all of which had not been processed.Really, again, accepting that this reactivity was there for a reason and it didn’t come from nowhere; she wasn’t just a crazy woman. These reactions had a basis in her life experience personally and in the collective experience as a person of color or as a biracial African American Korean woman.
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What started to be really important, in addition to these awareness processes of exploring where her reactivity was coming from and some of the origins of it both personally and societally, was beginning to encourage her to speak about this more. Also [to encourage] her to join conversation and community with others who had similar experiences and wounds who could say, “Yeah, that happened to me. Yeah, that triggers me, also.”
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She didn’t want to just make it her individual issue. Part of what was healing for her was seeing it as a collective issue and becoming more involved in groups and organizations where she could bond with people and get affirmed. This is part of the caring for the wound so that it begins to heal when we feel a sense of connection and commonality and shared experience with others. She became less reactive to issues of racism and more in a place of being responsive. It affirmed that there was a reason for her reactivity. We didn’t want to just dismiss it like it’s just a personal problem. There were layers to that reactivity.
[We] gave her some agency of, “If I see this as a problem, as unfairness, as ignorance,” however the ways she considered it, “How can I respond to this rather than react to it?” Again, [we were] increasing a sense of agency by bringing in that awareness, the allies, and the action piece of, what can I do then? What are some of the choices I can [make] to engage in the world around this trigger? Both attending to the wound and caring for the wound and attending to the conditions that created the wound so that one can be more active and feel that sense of agency. And both of those things helped to reduce the reactivity.”If you found this helpful, here are a few more resources for working with racial stress and trauma in a session:
What We Might Be Missing – Listening for Racial Stress in a Session
When Internalized Stereotypes Impact Depression
Working with the Trauma of Racism
And if you would like to learn more from Shelly and other top experts (like Peter Levine, PhD; Pat Ogden, PhD; Stephen Porges, PhD; Dan Siegel, MD; Richard Schwartz, PhD; and more) about how to help clients shift away from reactivity and build powerful self-regulation skills, click here.
Now we’d like to hear from you. Do you have clients who might benefit from the strategies that Shelly described? What are some other ways that you might work with a client’s emotional triggers? Please let us know in the comments below.
Thank you, Shelley, I deeply appreciate your insights around racism. This content is exceptionally helpful for finding ways to maneuver thru racially turbulent situations that have affected not just yourself, it also impacted your ancestors, and can be even more difficult to deal with when it is your descendants; your children and your grandchildren. Finding ways to self regulate as we navigate can often be extremely disruptive when we have been deeply triggered and are forced to revisit the traumas from past experiences. Therefore, greatly value the perspectives I receive thru you and other NICABM experts that help us as Wayne Dyer said about nobility. ‘Nobility is not being better than others it is being better than we were yesterday!”
Thank you. NICABM needs a LOT more conversations and webinars that integrate racism, classism, sexism, etc. and more diversity in presenters!
Hi Jeanne,
I understand and respect your perspective, but can I please offer some unsolicited education. When people of color talk about racism, can we please just leave the conversation at racism?
When addressing racism, it is essential to recognize that each form of discrimination (racism, sexism, classism, etc.) has its own distinct history, context, and effects on individuals and communities. Overly simplistic discussions of race and racism can shut down constructive conversations about systemic inequalities and hinder progress toward dismantling oppressive structures, because it place us in an oppression Olympic. Acknowledging this complexity allows for a more nuanced understanding of the challenges faced by specific groups.
People of color experiences and perspectives are invaluable in discussions about racism, and it is crucial to center the conversation on racism when addressing issues that primarily affect the black or other ethnic community. When discussions of race and racism become oversimplified, some individuals may hear blame or feel guilty or become defensive, overlooking deeply rooted in societal structures and historical contexts operates at both individual and systemic levels. This can lead to resistance in engaging in meaningful dialogue and action on understanding and addressing systemic oppression.
Recognizing and understanding these unique experiences is vital for fostering empathy, awareness, and positive change. Individual people change the culture, and only by changing the culture can we influence change to the structure.
I appreciate your presentation Shelly–thank you!!!! Yes, to validating and supporting avenues of self- compassionate agency, response and action for BIPOC folks! I’m loving that true compassion serves everyone. Yes to people with racial privilege who want to practice bystanding and allyship with clients.
This work requires so much continuous awareness and digestion of history, current experiences, and embodiment, in addition to all the trauma recovery skills. It requires attunement to frameworks and what is centered, moment to moment — anti-racism is an everyday practice, internal and external, that then shows up in our work, not as an add on, but as substantive and foundational.
I’m glad you’re present here Shelly!
–there are many of us BIPOC Folks in this professional community who are unseen, but our labor is the backbone of this work, and it is work that is done day in and day out. Though I’m appreciative of the wisdom all the trainers bring through in general; in the future I’d like to request, if you have another ‘anti-racism in the profession course,’ please headline and feature more or all BIPOC Folks, again acknowledging Shelly here–thank you for your efforts, as it’s our labor that brought this issue to the foreground and we are the ones who can speak to the continued challenges and burdens of imperialism in it’s various forms firsthand, both personally, and as we support clients of various walks of life.
On a separate note, I know there is a relatively newer request in the field that we use the term “activation” instead of “triggering” in this work. I know “triggering” has been a standardized word used in trauma work. In the future, it may be helpful to amend titles of trainings to reflect this.
Otherwise, I do appreciate your willingness to bring forth this long overdue topic.
I’d like to update and correct my response to appreciate and acknowledge Dr. Shelly Harrell, PhD by full name and title. My apologies for not doing so and any impact therein from my prior response.
I am a therapist in Minneapolis, very close to the first up rising and now 20 min. north of another shooting by police. I am deeply engaged with a Buddhist BIPOC group within my Sangha community. This was an wonderful example of a person of color being guided into her collective trauma, yet it is very rare. Most Black, Brown, and Asian folks know a great deal about racism and how it has affected them, their families, and this nation. I would also say, due to generational trauma, it will be a long time before individuals will come to individual therapy. The other critical piece is that as Therapists, we too are triggered by generation injustice. I would highly recommend everyone read the book
MY GRAMA’S HANDS by Resmaa Menakem Msw, Licsw
Peace, K. Avila
Thank you for sharing. I took a page of notes! Lots of good information along with a powerful example.
I’m a white woman and I live in Baltimore and I’m watching and listening to my black friends as they share their exhaustion and depression and how they are being affected by these continuous stories of assault on black bodies in this country. I’m going to share this with them so thank you.
Thank you Shelly.
This is very very helpful and insightful.